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Woman Pissed After Discovering Boyfriend Using Her Expensive Hair Dryer To Dry His ‘Nards’

Arun Sharma/Unsplash

Let’s face it, as much as we hated hearing it as kids, it’s true that money doesn’t grow on trees.

Because we generally have to work for what we have, we tend to be as responsible with them as possible, pointed out the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.

Redditor Kitchen-Vegetable734 had asked his wife’s new, expensive hairdryer, which she of course said yes to.

But when she was angry after she found out how he was using it, the Original Poster (OP) wondered if he was in the wrong.

He asked the sub:

“AITA for using my wife’s $400 hairdryer on my ‘nards’?” 

The OP was curious about his wife’s new hairdryer. 

“35 Male here. My wife (32 Female) bought herself this awesome hairdryer from Dys*n last month, and she paid over $400 for it.”

“This is easily the coolest hair dryer I’ve ever seen. It’s silver/purple and has this really cool design. Reminds me of the Plasma Rifle from Halo.”

“Super quiet as well! You can dry your hair in stealth mode.”

“I was so impressed by this dryer that I asked my wife if I could use it too.”

“She said I could use it whenever I wanted, and it was good that I use it to better get our money’s worth.”

The OP soon worked out a routine that worked for him.

“I started using it every morning after my shower to dry my hair instead of just towel and air drying like I used to. I have short hair, so it only took like a minute to dry.”

“I still felt like I wasn’t getting much use out of it, so I started experimenting.”

“I tried drying my armpits (makes applying deodorant much nicer), and I started drying down below. Side note: 100% do recommend. Without going into much detail, it just feels a lot more hygienic throughout the day.”

But his wife didn’t appreciate the routine when she found out about it.

“This morning, my wife walked into the bathroom after my shower and saw something perhaps she wasn’t meant to see.”

“For the record, I did not intend for her to come in, but I didn’t have the door locked.”

“I had one foot on the floor, one foot on the counter. Hairdryer in hand pointed towards Venus and Earth. I may have also been humming the Halo theme.”

“My wife had a bit of a freakout and was like, ‘What are you doing?!'”

“I stopped and reminded her that she said I could use the dryer whenever I wanted.”

“She countered with saying that she didn’t say I could use it ‘that’ way.”

“So I’m not sure if my wife has a point here. I definitely did not explicitly state how I was going to use the dryer, but there was no conversation of limitations beforehand.”

“AITA?”

Fellow Redditors weighed in:

  • NTA: Not the A**hole
  • YTA: You’re the A**hole
  • ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
  • NAH: No A**holes Here

Some didn’t see a problem, since the hairdryer wouldn’t be touching him.

“But you understand hair dryers blow away, right? It’s not a vacuum? He could literally put it right up against his a**hole and it would be blowing everything like, away from the hairdryer.”

“He’s definitely not touching it to his skin, he’s literally holding it in the air, after literally coming out of a shower, so like, what’s actually gross about it???” – Peninsulaman713

“The person that you cuddle with, kiss, have sex with, and give and receive oral sex from are not going to somehow give you some magic gross disease by using your hairdryer. If they had one, you’ve already gotten it.”

“I’m reminded of that garbage ‘Winnie the Pooh’ post from a few weeks ago where literally all the comments thought the guy was being unsanitary by being naked on a couch, but being naked in bed is somehow fine.”

“How are these people intimate if they can’t handle coming within 2 inches of hot air with the other partner’s genitals? Just bizarre.” – critical_thinker13

“But… OP is just coming out of the shower. He’s as clean as it gets. His ball skin at that point in the day is not really any different from his scalp.”

“They’re married. The amount of actual genital-to-face contact they have is likely non-zero anyway, so the idea of people being mad about a hairdryer being near their spouse’s freshly washed junk is totally foreign to me.”

“I would definitely laugh my a** off if I walked in on my husband using my hairdryer on his undercarriage, but I don’t see being mad about it.” – Flower_of_Telperion

“Do other women not do this? I don’t like putting on my undies wet, and I don’t like sitting around naked after a shower. So I dry off with a hairdryer in winter, or stand in front of the bedroom fan for a couple of minutes in summer.”

“The only part I don’t do this with is my hair, which is only allowed to air dry.” – merrycat

“Using the dryer under boobs works soooooo much better than using a towel to try to dry the area. Ditto for where the pelvis meets the thighs, and other spots in that general region. Not leaving those areas moist keeps them healthier, and less prone to yeast infections.”

“I also use the hairdryer to dry the spaces between my toes.” – MontanaPurpleMntns

“NGL (not gonna lie), our hair dryer is currently plugged into the nursery wall. Its primary function is now to gentle ensure baby-junk is dry before re-diapering. No more rashes!”

“I think OP is NTA. I assume my husband has dried every part of himself with that thing.” – the_saradoodle

“Not at all NTA. I’ve ‘caught’ my partner in a compromising (and intimate?) session with the hairdryer. I just excused myself and closed the door right back up, lol (laughing out loud).” – WithoutDennisNedry

But others felt the OP should have at least talked to his wife about it first.

“I do the same thing with my girlfriend’s hairdryer, and she doesn’t know, but I figured it’d be no big deal since she’s the one who told me it was good to completely dry my scalp after getting out of the shower. Figured that applied to the rest of my body as well.”

“You’re definitely NTA, I don’t know why anyone (especially your significant other) would view it as unhygienic or gross. Makes me wonder if she thought you were pleasuring yourself with it somehow… Anyway, off to tell my girlfriend what I’ve been doing with her hairdryer, lol (laughing out loud).” – A1sauc3d

“Bro, come on. All jokes aside, you ought to groom a bit so you shouldn’t have to use a blow-dryer on your pubes. I’m a male so I get it, we have a lot of hair but still, be reasonable.”

“It’s 400 dollars, she uses it on her hair, and you use it on your balls. That’s just disrespectful.” – RepresentativeBet401

“You’re assuming he’s actually given his balls and taint a decent scrub. There’s a lot of guys who think just by standing in running water, they are clean and don’t need to soap and scrub.” – courpsey

“Eh, I’d be pretty pissed if I found out that someone was using my expensive hairdryer, the thing I use pretty close to my face, 2 inches from their genitals. F**king gross.” – AlexGarrido

“NAH.” 

“It’s understandable that your wife was upset that you used her new, specialty hairdryer in an… let’s say unconventional way. At the end of the day, it’s her dryer and you should respect her rules of use for it.”

“If you continue to dry your nethers with it after she asked you not to, YWBTA (you would be the a**hole).” – BananicattheDisco

“I was going to mention walking in on my sisters doing it growing up. I think it’s kind of a universal thing because it’s easy and it works.”

“Unless you’re, like, touching your junk to the hairdryer. I’d say NTA, although if the item was hers (as in, she paid for it herself without any help from someone else), it’s probably best to ask permission to use it in any way, nards or not.” – DiscoAgent13

“It’s going to burn out the motor faster. Hairdryers don’t actually last forever, not even the expensive ones. She was expecting him to add the usage to it from drying just his hair, she wasn’t expecting him to start drying his whole body with it.”

“It kind of like if you ask your husband if you can use his hammer and he (rightfully) assumes you just mean to do normal hammer-tasks so he says you can use it whenever you want, not thinking (once again, rightfully) that you’ll be using it for more than what you’d normally use a hammer for.”

“Then he finds out you’ve been ‘experimenting’ to see how else you can use it and you end up using the nail-remover side to dig up weeds. He would have a right to be upset because you’re adding more wear-and-tear than he reasonably thought you would be.”

“Or if your sister says you can use her jacket whenever you want(assuming that like a normal person you’re going to wear it to go outside), but you start using it as PJs every night.”

“Or if you ask your parents if you can use the car to go shopping and they say to use it whenever you need, but then you start going on joyrides around the whole city just for fun.”

“I don’t have a better example off the top of my head, but… In video games, items usually have a visual ‘durability’ bar that shows you every use of a tool depletes its overall ‘durability.’ While we don’t have that visual bar in real life, the concept actually does remain true.”

“Every man-made object only has so many uses in it before it needs to be repaired/replaced. If it’s not actually yours and someone is letting you use it, you need to be considerate of the ‘durability’ you’re using up.” – SnakesInYerPants

The subReddit was pretty divided on this one, going back and forth between communication being the key to success and the air being blown from a hairdryer being no more intimate than other acts in a marriage.

At the very least, the OP had something to think about, and he certainly caused a few laughs.

Written by McKenzie Lynn Tozan

McKenzie Lynn Tozan has been a part of the George Takei family since 2019 when she wrote some of her favorite early pieces: Sesame Street introducing its first character who lived in foster care and Bruce Willis delivering a not-so-Die-Hard opening pitch at a Phillies game. She's gone on to write nearly 3,000 viral and trending stories for George Takei, Comic Sands, Percolately, and ĂœberFacts. With an unstoppable love for the written word, she's also an avid reader, poet, and indie novelist.