They happen to about half the worlds population and are as natural as we are.
There is no reason to shame people for normal bodily functions.
Redditor throwRAperiodx found herself in a hurtful situation with her boyfriend every time she was on her period. Wondering if she was overreacting she turned to the subReddit “Am I the Asshole” (AITA) to see if her actions were justified.
“AITA: My boyfriend places sheets on all of the furniture when I’m on my period?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“So, my (24F) boyfriend (28M) is really protective over his furniture, I assume it’s because they’re white. This really shows when I’m on my period.”
”My boyfriend does humiliating things like placing sheets on all of the chairs and lounges (I feel like if I were to leak, I’d just leak through the sheets anyway) and makes me sleep in the guest bedroom on the first two days of my period (my heaviest days) and then he even asks me about when was the last time I changed my tampon.”
”I’m a grown woman who has had her period since the age of 12, I don’t need somebody to remind me to change a tampon.”
“When he does this I just feel embarrassed and it gives me the vibe that he cares more about materialistic objects than me. I’m not even allowed to cuddle him during my period. He acts like I’m just gushing like a waterfall or something.”
”I started my period yesterday and as I expected – the sheets come out. I decide to put my foot down and I take off all of the sheets off the furniture, which got my boyfriend irritated to which I told him that he needs to stop treating me like a leaking juicebox.”
”He’s saying that I have no right to prevent him from keeping his expensive furniture clean and that I’M the one acting like a ‘jerk.’ I need to know, AITA?”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Not only was it agreed the OP was NTA, Redditors had some strong thoughts on the boyfriend’s behavior judging him to be a big AH.
“NTA. I know accidents can happen, like if you get your period unexpectedly, but most people in their 20s can reliably prevent leakage. He’s treating you like a dog who can’t be trusted not to track mud onto the furniture. There’s especially no excuse for this if, as it sounds, you’ve never even actually bled on any of his stuff.”
”The part where he won’t even cuddle you just crosses the line into him being a giant baby. I would be annoyed as h*ll if a guy acted this way with me. How about he just minds his own business, and lets you, the person who actually has periods, handle it yourself.”
“And I’m inclined to agree with you – unless those are some THICK a** sheets, they’re just sheets, and if you bled onto them it would go right through anyway. So this is extra dumb. If anything, put down a towel.”~e-elegia
“NTA he is controlling and deflecting. I could maybe understand the sheet thing if it was something you both worried about and he did it to ease your worries about the furniture, but that doesn’t sound anything like what’s going on here. He asks you when you changed your tampon and he makes you sleep in the guest room???”
”Why are you going along with this? You are going to be dealing with your periods for maybe another 20 years of your life, is this the kind of thing you want to have to either put up with or teach him to do better with? Come on.”~AcrossTheMilkySeas
“Where do women find these guys? Last post was about a guy not being able to not make a mess on the floor in the bathroom.”
“I have never done anything like that to my gf. I mean, I’ll check around for a heating pad and blankets (not to go under her)”
”He’s an a**”
“Good god. Run, girl. You don’t des to be treated like this. NTA of course, we don’t choose to have our periods and this guy is shaming you for it.”
”Maybe he’d be better off with a Barbie toy. Get yourself someone who cares and brings you ice cream and chocolate, not someone who worries about their furniture.”~nahareeli
“NTA. How long have you two been together? If this is a new-ish relationship (less than a year) I’d probably leave because this is disgusting behavior that leads me to other conclusions about him: he’s immature, materialistic, and he’s literally treating you like an that animal he’s worried about messing up his furniture.”
”The fact that he won’t even cuddle you or let you sleep in the bedroom shows he probably thinks less of you just for having a period. Like you’re dirty and should be ashamed and it’s all your fault you have a period.”
”The tampon thing leads me to believe he kind of thinks you are dumb and just a mess waiting to happen. It’s also bordering on controlling, like he doesn’t believe you’re capable of doing basic things on your own.”
“I may be reading a lot into it, but if my boyfriend treated me like this I’d feel awful and incredibly disrespected and not want anything to do with him even when I’m not on my period if his affection is conditional on something I can’t even control.“~ Et-selec
”I’ve been getting my period for 24 years now, and the majority of those years I’ve had to deal with very heavy flows, sometimes with limited access to very cheap products. I’ve had my share of leaks.”
”I’ve stained exactly zero pieces of furniture. I’m not saying that it can’t happen, sure it could, but this day dude is out of his G*dd*mn mind and has no business enjoying the company of women. When I read the bit about him asking her about when she last changed her tampon it felt like someone poured cold water down the back of my shirt. So f*cking sleevy.”
“NTA. OP please show him this thread so he knows how fucking crazy he is.”~fokkoooff
It is never ok to shame a person for menstruation. Hopefully the boyfriend learns a lesson in respecting other people’s bodies soon.