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Guy ‘Embarrassed’ After Partner Laughs At Him For Getting Pink Eye From A Strip Club

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The ability to laugh at ourselves is, in my opinion, integral to the human experience.

We can look at our own silliness, our own misfortune, and find the humor in it even when we’re suffering.

The trouble, of course, is that not everyone may find the joke funny.

What happens when misfortune befalls someone you love and you can’t help but find the result funny?

That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) ArtichokeDry2315 when she came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.

She asked,

“AITA for laughing at my fiance when he got pinkeye at the strippers?”

OP began with some relevant background.

“I was raised by a couple of sex-positive Gen Xers who taught me to enjoy life as long as I wasn’t hurting anyone.”

“My fiance was raised by Mormons.”

“Nothing wrong with Mormons.”

“His family didn’t cut him off when he left the church but they are still distant from him.”

“They think I’m the devil 😈.”

Then she explained the situation.

“So one of his friends from work is getting married and my boyfriend went to his bachelor’s party in Montreal.”

“I’m not against sex work so long as it isn’t exploitative.”

“I told him to go have fun and have him $100 in singles because I know Canadians use coins and I have no idea what the stripper games are like there.”

Then the problem created by that situation.

“So he came home with conjunctivitis. Pink eye.”

“From getting too close to a stripper’s butt I imagine.”

“As soon as I saw him I knew what happened and I laughed.”

“I mean who gets pinkeye at 28? Once again I trust my fiance. He loves me. I love him.”

“I know he was just having fun with his friends.”

“So I got him the drops and made sure there were lots of clean towels and face cloths for him.”

“I also put a plastic bag besides the dirty clothes hamper for anything that went near his eye to be separated so we could wash it in hot water.”

“He is embarrassed and says I made him feel like an idiot for laughing at him. I feel bad but I think it was funny.”

OP was left to wonder,


Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment.

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided: NTA

Many pointed to OP’s attitude as exemplary.


“You were supportive of his trip, even gave him the singles, and laughed at his bad luck instead of getting mad at him for being careless.”

“He just needs to chill a bit. Keep working on him, maybe one day he’ll learn to laugh about these things too; it’s better for his mental health!” ~ cdifl


“I think his pride took a hit and that’s why he doesn’t like the laughing.”

“But you are more than kind about it. It’s ok to also see humor.”

“The saying ‘if I don’t laugh I’ll cry’ comes to mind.” ~ No-Map672

“NTA, the humour you found in it isn’t mean-spirited and it doesn’t sound he was particularly insulted by your words.”

“Sounds like something you two can look back on and both laugh at in a couple of years!” ~ TapFlashy7135

Others pointed out that no one really misbehaved here.

“Shouldn’t this be NAH?”

“Guy just is embarrassed and as the post, only expressed discomfort over OP laughing, which is as fair as the laughing itself. If he starts berating or acting out then yeah, he would be an AH, but just complaining once doesn’t make him (Or anyone else in this post) an AH.” ~ SparkAxolotl


“He shouldn’t be such a baby but I blame it on residual LDS guilt. I’m glad he had fun.”

“And, honestly, I bet he got pink eye from a bunch of dirty boys who didn’t wash their hands enough, not from stripper butt.” ~ JohnSnowsPump

Though not everyone seemed to be on OP’s side.

“I’m wondering why ‘sex-positive’ OP thinks that strippers are more likely to spread diseases than other people.” ~ thecatinthemask

“Yes she certainly does and sounds like she thinks she’s some kind of devilish goddess trophy wife for encouraging her fiancé to do questionable things – like sticking his face in a stripper’s a**hole.”

“Pink eye can come from absolutely anywhere and is as simple as touching your eye briefly when your hand has come in contact with the bacteria.”

“It can also come from a viral infection like a sinus infection or a cold.” ~ JAS233116

OP is in the wrong for assuming this pinkeye is in any way related to the strippers, frankly.”

“The stack of hundred dollar bills she handed him is a far more likely vector – cash is covered in bacteria. As is basically any surface he was near while traveling.”

“Choosing to insist with any reason (and she really has no reason) that this is a result of him going to a strip club is a really mean-spirited take for her fiance who clearly has a lifetime of programmed guilt and shame about these sorts of things.”

“It’s crazy how many people are just… assuming OP is right in her assumption that is not grounded in any rational assessment of Pink-Eye.”

“A disease that is extremely contagious, lives on surfaces for weeks and is extremely common at all ages and consistently spread via mass transit, hotels, and the like.”

“The want to reflexively blame a stripper for it is gross.”

“It’s an order of magnitude more likely he picked it up touching a surface of the plane, or the airport, or a hotel.”

“Unless he was at that strip club most of his time in Montreal, it’s probably not where he got it.” ~ Mantisfactory

There were also Pink-Eye related anecdotes.

“When I was an optician, we had many adults come in who got diagnosed with pink eye.”

“I doubt they got it from their children because they were often completely clueless as to what they had.”

“And frequently the doctor would come running out of the office to let us know so we could sanitize all the frames the person had inevitable tried on while they were waiting for their appointment…”~ everdishevelled

“I’ve worked with kids for the last 10+ years and have 3 of my own.”

“I get pinkeye like once every other year or so even though I obsessively wash my hands all day long.”

“But that doesn’t stop a toddler from sticking a booger finger directly in my eye (like happened today).” ~ Fu*k_Desantis

“I got pink eye for the first time age 40. It’s ridiculously contagious.”

“He could have gotten it on the plane, at his friend’s house, anywhere.”

“Maybe OP needs to back off just a bit from the teasing.”

“OP is still NTA, but to assume it was due to stripper-eye contact, and that age has anything to do with it, is a bit much.”

“Not to mention, conjunctivitis makes you feel pretty awful, on top of the eye irritation.” ~ Zhoenish

Though, some suggested there might be deeper issues involved.

“NTA – BUT a lot of people with his background have hang-ups from their religion for the rest of their lives.”

“You know him better than us but I would check in just to make sure it’s about him feeling dumb and your laughter rubbed it in and not maybe triggering something that made him feel uncomfortable or less safe.” ~ APAG

“I’m an ExMo too and I second this.”

“You’re definitely NTA and you sound amazing, but I would have a conversation with him about it.”

“He might be feeling shame for many reasons.”

“He might even feel grief because as a 28-year-old this shouldn’t have happened to him (like you said), but because he was not allowed to have a young-adulthood he didn’t know it would happen (I didn’t know this was a thing lol).”

“Again, NTA, but I can see how this could be a very touchy subject (pun intended?) and personally I have found therapy to be incredibly helpful for similar things!”

“There is an unholy amount to unpack.” ~ throwaway836463838

“I think NTA, but this post does give cool girl monologue from Gone Girl “

“‘She does protest too much’ vibes.”

“I hope you know you can be uncomfortable and not ok with your boyfriend traveling abroad to visit a strip club.”

“It doesn’t make you not sex positive or unsupportive of sex workers or a bad gf unsympathetic to his mormon past.”

“I’m not saying you aren’t ok with this. I’m just saying if any part of you wasn’t ok, I hope you know it’s valid to express that and ask for boundaries.”

“That wouldn’t make you a prude & anti sex work.” ~ excel_pager_420


“He likely just has a lot of hang-ups and guilt still hanging over them, so it’s possible the pink eye issue is more of a sore spot than you might have realized.”

“He’s embarrassed, and he might also be dealing with serious feelings of shame.”

“You weren’t being mean-spirited, so you’re N T A, but I can empathize with why he might have slightly overreacted to you laughing.”

“Maybe just check in with him and see how he’s feeling.”

“If there is a lot of guilt, therapy may be a good step for him to look into (assuming he isn’t already in therapy). Religious trauma is no joke, and the indoctrination can go deep.” ~ p_iynx

We are all fools at one point or another.

We fall on slick pavement or we bump into things we didn’t notice.

We catch cold the night before our big presentation.

Not taking ourselves too seriously helps us to navigate the random ridiculousness of our lives with joy more often than terror, but sometimes it’s okay not to laugh.

Written by Frank Geier

Frank Geier (pronouns he/him) is a nerd and father of three who recently moved to Alabama. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human.