Service animals are an essential part of survival for many.
They’re normally very well-behaved and are always on point with their duties.
It’s the general population that can be problematic when it comes to these animals; especially regarding service dogs.
So many people want to pet them and touch them.
But some have the opposite reaction…
Redditor ariane0485 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
They asked:
“AITA for refusing to take my daughter’s service dog back home?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I have a 12-year-old daughter (let’s call her Reese) who has a service dog for her diabetes.”
“The dog is by her side about 22 hours a day. “
“Recently, we were going to visit some newer relatives, so I double-checked with the host to make sure that nobody had allergies and she said it was fine.”
“So we show up to this family function and one of the cousins (let’s call her May) is immediately concerned and says we can’t bring the dog in because her 4-year-old is deathly afraid of dogs.”
“I explained the situation and that the dog wouldn’t go near her child, and May still insisted that her daughter wouldn’t be comfortable and asked me if I could ‘put the dog away’ or take it back home.”
“I didn’t budge, so she ended up sitting as far away from the dog as she could possibly get, telling her upset daughter ‘I won’t let the dog hurt you’ which made Reese feel like she was causing trouble, and stressed the kid out.”
“My S[ister]-I[n]-L[aw] says that I could have prevented the drama by just taking the dog home for its rest time and monitored Reese myself.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“AITA for refusing to take my daughter’s service dog home?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“You’re NTA. Service Dog trumps fear of dogs, even if it’s a small child who ‘fears’ the dog.”
“She ended up sitting as far away from the dog as she could possibly get, telling her upset daughter ‘I won’t let the dog hurt you.'”
“Jeez, May, I wonder why your kid is scared of dogs.”
“Maybe because she acts like a (presumably well-behaved and minding his own business) service dog is the boogeyman.” ~ Dittoheadforever
“Sounds like Cousin May is afraid or hates dogs and wants to make sure her child feels the same.
“NTA. Please tell Reese that she did absolutely nothing wrong and if someone should feel ashamed for causing trouble those are SIL and May.”
“Also explain to her (better if in front of SIL) that sometimes adults are rude and ignorant about service dogs, and SIL is not a safe adult for her as her behavior wasn’t okay.” ~ Commercial-Loan-929
“I’ve seen adults make their kids scared of dogs.”
“As soon as the parent was out of the house (it was at a 4-h club), the leader showed the kids how to give commands to the well-trained dogs.”
“Kids were amazed when dogs did what they told the dogs to do. Kids relaxed.”
“Mom came to pick them up, kids tried to show off new skills, as mom made the kids nervous, again.”
“Luckily, the leader was more skilled at teaching than the incompetent parent was at intimidating her kids, and the kids steadily improved.”
“Even mom improved.”
“But it was entirely asinine and unnecessary.”
“The mother was scaring her kids.”
“It was only because the leader was really good at both kids and dogs that the kids learned to deal with dogs.” ~ Neenknits
“I grew up on the water, and being Aussie, it’s a huge part of our lives.”
“Motherhood has ruined me to the point that I am terrified of my kids drowning at the beach or in the pool.”
“Luckily, I had the self-awareness to realize that wasn’t good for my kids, so from their first time in the pool, I stepped back and let my husband, his mates (my kid’s honorary Uncles), and my dad all handle water safety.”
“My eldest and youngest are ‘water babies,’ but my middle is scared of it (has improved a lot since Christmas and now will go deeper than his knees as long as he can still touch the bottom easily).”
“I am scared to think of how scared he would be if I had been around him with my nerves.”
“It’s our job as parents to protect our kids, and sometimes, what they need protecting from is us.”
“May needs to step back and let her kid make their own assessment of dogs.”
“OP’s daughter’s dog would have been the perfect time to teach her child that not all dogs are scary.”
“And that when dogs like OP’s daughter’s dog are working they are too busy to notice anyone who isn’t their job and as long as you leave them alone, they will usually leave you alone too if you aren’t part of their job.” ~ Environmental_Art591
“You could not ask for a better, calmer dog to be around a scared child.”
“Great opportunity for mom to tell the kid, ‘See, nothing to worry about. This is a nice dog.'”
“You’re NTA.”
“Not sure why she thinks her kid is more important than yours.” ~ RebaKitt3n
“NTA. You did nothing wrong.”
“In fact that parent missed a massive learning exercise for their own kid to address their fear of dogs.”
“Some people are just jerks, turns out there’s some in every family.” ~ Tal_Tos_72
“NTA, but sounds like you need to handle this with May/the new family members because the likelihood is this is not the first nor will it be the last time you will have a situation like this.”
“Tell may she either teaches her daughter to not be so afraid of dogs or she can choose to not come to future family functions as the dog will be at every single one regardless.” ~ Internal-Test-8015
“The only time I have ever seen a service dog jump on a stranger was when the stranger was about to have a seizure.”
“It was absolutely amazing, the owner was apologizing to the stranger for the dog’s odd behavior and then the gent’s seizure started, this dog sat with him like it was his owner until it subsided.”
“Service dogs do amazing work.” ~ justtired2022
“OMG! Would you ask someone who had an oxygen tank to leave it at home because a child is afraid of masks?”
“Or ask an amputee to stay home because metal legs freaked out the kid? Totally NTA.”
“The parents had a great opportunity to help their child get past her fears by letting her see a good dog and the mother just reinforced the phobia.” ~ curkington
OMG some people. What a teaching moment that could be for the kid. Hey, I know you’re afraid of dogs, but your (cousin, whatever) has a medical condition and she needs the dog. You don’t have to get near it, but I’ll stand near you until you know the dog won’t come near you.
Sometimes people just suck. Ugh.” ~ GoGetSilverBalls
OP responded…
“I get the fear.”
“I was afraid of dogs as a kid.”
“When I was a toddler, my parents would ask if people could put their dogs away when we visited somewhere.”
“But never a service animal.”
“They taught me that service dogs were working and were very calm.”
“And as I got older, they basically gave me exposure therapy by weaning me off the ‘put the dog away’ thing, and I got over it.”
“So I understand how the little one is feeling in a way, but at the same time it’s a service animal and she’s going to have to get used to them because they’re a part of society 🤷🏼♀️.”
Reddit continued…
“NTA. Aside from all other factors, the dog was not an actual problem – but a calm animal by your daughter’s side.”
“You had gotten preapproval.”
“You had no real place to ‘put the dog away.'”
“But I find your SIL’s suggestion rude.”
“You were being asked to leave the event with your daughter to return the dog home and then come back yourself?”
“And if May was really worried she could have left herself.” ~ Raisins_Rock
“NTA. Your daughter’s dog is medical equipment (I’m sure they’re very adorable medical equipment that loves her, but still, the dog is part of her treatment).”
“They wouldn’t ask you to remove any of her other medical devices or equipment to treat her condition.”
“It’s unfortunate that the other child is afraid of dogs, but the mom made it worse by making it a big deal.”
“She should’ve handled it differently and never should’ve asked you to take the dog away.” ~ ExRiverFish4557
“NTA 100%. You checked with the host in advance.”
“The service dog is essential for your daughter’s safety and wellbeing.”
“She ended up sitting as far away from the dog as she could possibly get, telling her upset daughter I won’t let the dog hurt you.”
“So May actively caused the drama she claimed she wanted to avoid.”
“As well as demonstrating really bad parenting. Instead of using it as an opportunity to gently and safely demonstrate the vast majority of dogs are safe and positive, she chose to amplify her child’s fears as much as possible.” ~ Apart-Ad-6518
“NTA you checked with the host, and you were informed that it was ok.”
“Doesn’t matter if you only asked about allergies, they should’ve told you that there was a kid afraid of dogs, but they didn’t, so is on them to fix the problem.” ~ SergioFHAR
Well, OP, Reddit is with you. Without her service dog, your daughter could’ve been in danger.
Like many on Reddit said… “Sad that ‘May’ couldn’t use this as a teachable moment.”
Hopefully, at future functions, this won’t be an issue.