For decades, after internet and home computing became the norm, many office based industries claimed they’d never be able to have remote or work-from-home (WFH) employees.
But then, the pandemic. Suddenly offices across the globe were willing to offer remote or WFH employment. One byproduct was many disabled people were able to enter the workforce.
But industry often prefers one size fits all solutions to problems of their own making. The abandonment of remote and WFH employment ushered in return-to-office (RTO) orders in both public and private industry.
An office worker dealing with a conflict born of their company’s RTO order turned to the Am I The A**Hole (AITAH) subReddit for feedback.
Similar to AITA, the AITAH subReddit allows posters to ask for advice and post about ending romantic relationships—both things that are banned on AITA. However there are no required voting acronyms—only suggested ones—and no official final judgment declared.
TossAway404040 asked:
“AITAH for refusing to give my coworker their office back now that work-from-home (WFH) has been canceled?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“Back in 2023, a woman (Jenn) in my building left for maternity leave. After having her child, Jenn took advantage of our company’s WFH program, which left her office open.”
“The company would have held her office for maternity leave. It only came up as available when she selected not to return to the office.”
“I placed in a request for the space with my manager and was given the go, so I got to leave my crappy cubicle for my very own private office.”
“My employer has announced that WFH will end on 11/17/25. All employees are to be back in the office by that date.”
“Yeah, that sucks, I know. Yesterday, WFH employees came in for tours and desk assignments.”
“When Jenn saw I was in her office, she became agitated and asked if I’d be leaving so she could take back over. I told her flatly that I had no intent to give up the office.”
“Jenn spoke with a manager about this and management’s immediate decision was that I was under no obligation to move out of the office. I was approached and asked if I had any interest in returning to a cubicle, I said no, and there was no follow up from my manager or HR as they both see the matter as closed.”
“Now, just a day later, I’m getting a stink from coworkers who think I’m punishing Jenn for something outside her control. Jenn has also emailed me, asking me to consider the position she’s in and that she’s already being punished by the company by being compelled to return to the building, and asking me to consider her feelings.”
“Sincerely, I definitely understand how much this sucks for her and everyone else being forced to come back, but I like having my own office. I have a lot of stuff in here that I’d otherwise have to carry back home.”
“I’d be giving up the privacy that I’ve become adjusted to, and, if I’m being honest, I enjoy actually having a nice window to look out and none of the noise of the cubicles.”
“AITAH on this one?”
Some Redditors weighed in by using the AITA voting acronyms:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not wrong o stay put (NTA).
“If there is no work reason for her to have the office and HR/your boss aren’t telling you that you have to move, just stand your ground.” ~ Henwen
“You followed the rules and worked hard. Jenn is trying to subvert the rules and take something from you. NTA.” ~ Raz_Moon
“The correct answer is to forward this to management and HR, saying she is making you uncomfortable by pushing for this. Bring up the toxic environment with all the nasty looks and comments from her, and consider it done.” ~ switch138366
“It’s also not a good look that she feels like she’s being punished by the company for the decision to return to working in the office. It sucks, but claiming you’re being punished for a company-wide decision is pretty dramatic.” ~ TheNihilistNarwhal
“It’s definitely unfair to put it on OP. I can understand her feeling that way, but it should be directed at the company, not OP. Also, she should have considered this outcome when taking advantage of the WFH policy, she knew she had a special deal with that office, and her not using it due to WFH it is obvious that she would risk that boon.” ~ lejoop
“I suspect that Jenn is one of those ‘but I had a BAY-BEE and EVERYTHING in my life is more important than yours now’ people. Sure, everyone else also has to RTO, but it’s a punishment to HER specifically, so the very least OP can do is try to make Jenn’s work life more comfortable.”
“I love that, even if OP gave up the office, it probably wouldn’t go to Jenn anyhow. She had two whole years of the convenience of working in yoga pants and being with her baby all day, she needs to suck it up. – and I say this as someone who HATES coming into the office & thinks we should all be allowed to WFH if we want.”
“I cannot even imagine asking someone who has earned an office if they had any interest in returning to a cubicle—who on earth would say ‘why yes, I would LOVE to leave my nice large quiet office to go sit in a cubicle farm!’?” ~ Houston970
“Why would OP feel bad? Her coworker got to work from home for 2 years, save on gas, and spend time with her kids. She gave up her office to enjoy that advantage. It hadn’t been her office for 2 years.”
“The coworker is behaving entitled, starting with her attitude that the company is ‘punishing’ her by ending WFH, as most companies did.”
“The coworker is not more important than OP. She wants the perk she gave up when she chose to WFH, saving on gas and spending more time with her kids for years. It hasn’t been her office for years.” ~ Shdfx1
“Keep it. There is no good reason for you to move out when this woman would never have come back voluntarily. Did she expect it to sit empty?”
“Your other co-workers should mind their own business. I definitely would have NOTHING to say about this if it happened in my office. It’s actually quite silly.” ~ gayleweed3
“Oh, absolutely NTA. She never had any intent of ever using it again and now it’s suddenly a problem because she’s forced back and feels entitled to it.”
But you ‘won’ an empty office fair and square. I’m sure it’s super frustrating for her, and hopefully she’ll have an opportunity to earn her own office again in the future, but she’s not entitled to something she gave up years ago.” ~ RemarkableStudent196
“Then there is nothing to do for it. It’s not her office. It’s yours. She gave it up, and sadly, WFH went away. That sucks, but that’s not on you. She won the right once, maybe she can win another one, but it’s been two years, c’mon. NTA.” ~ lpmiller
“Soooooo she could wait and bid on the next office to come up? And quite possibly win it?”
“Damn, she’s being whiny. Keep your manager in the loop about her pettiness. You want her track record documented if she escalates.” ~ StormBeyondTime
“Jenn is causing a lot of issues for OP about this. Her coworkers’ saying that losing the office was ‘out of her control’ is false.”
“She could have come back after her maternity leave, but she didn’t. She forfeited the office when she decided to work from home. Jenn needs to realize that and move on.” ~ rikimae528
The OP provided an update:
“So something someone (a few people, really) brought up that I hadn’t considered was the question of if I vacated the office, would that necessarily mean Jenn could have it back.”
“On Monday, my manager had approached me about returning to a cubicle to verify my lack of interest, but this morning I checked with HR on the policy. Sure enough, you cannot simply choose someone to give your office to, as office assignments are selected by policy.”
My company has 15 non-managerial offices. When one becomes available, you may ‘bid’ on one, and whoever has the most seniority and best performance metrics wins the office. Generally, one or two offices become available every year either because of promotions or turnover.”
“So Jenn and I are no different than anyone else in the cubicles. When it became available, I got it because I asked and had the seniority and metrics to win over anyone else who’d placed a request.”
“The office would go into the pool if I vacated, which means Jenn would be competing with everyone else over it. Several of the WFH people who have returned are more senior than her, and at least one of them is definitely interested in the next bidding that comes up, so Jenn would be out of luck.”
“HR is going to circulate a reminder on the office bidding policies.”
“I also brought up the email with my manager, who stated she will reply to it and cc Jenn’s manager to ensure there is an understanding that this matter should be considered closed.”
Letting management and HR handle this going forward is OP’s best option.
That way, OP can stay out of any direct conflict with Jenn and everything will be documented.