Sometimes neighbors can’t help but see into one another’s homes.
This is especially true in big cities.
Apartment buildings in New York are basically built right on top of one another.
So seeing directly into a person’s windows can be not only easy but unavoidable.
Even with that knowledge, some neighbors are still living clothing-optional lives.
Redditor Topical-Cement wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subreddit.
They asked:
“WIBTA If I told my neighbor that I can see everything?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“Not totally sure this fits here, but I would like some advice about how to broach this subject with my neighbor.”
“I live in an apartment complex, and we all have floor-to-ceiling windows.”
“I have a neighbor who lives a few doors down, and we have spoken maybe 5 words to each other.”
“The thing I dont know how to bring up is her window faces my windows at a pretty weird angle, so any time I look out my own window its like a perfect view of her apartment.”
“Recently, she’s been walking around a lot less clothed, going to the bathroom with the door open, things like that.”
“So any time I look out my window its just right there.”
“I’m literally not trying to be a creep. “
“I’ll be checking to see if a friend is pulling up, or watching the birds with my cats, whatever it is, but it’s the first thing I end up seeing.”
“I’ve been mulling over how to bring this up in any of our elevator rides together, but I have no idea if I should just let it be or tell her that her windows are just as visible as mine are.”
“You can see directly into my apartment if you’re walking down the block, so I installed blackout curtains that I only open for light for my plants.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“So, WIBTA if I just straight up told her I can see her bazoingas every night?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA, but just be direct and tell her, in a way that doesn’t make you seem like a creep.”
“‘Hey, just a heads up, your apartment is very visible from my window, so other people can probably see in as well. Might want to install some curtains for privacy as I have,’ or something along those lines.”
“Don’t broach the subject by telling her you’ve seen her hanging out with the girls hanging out, though.” ~ DrChimz
“Nope! As a woman, nope!”
“It’s scarier when you dont have a face to place the note on.”
“Was it just op, the normal neighbor?”
“Or the creepy neighbor who is harassing her?”
“Most often, there’s a creep in the building that every woman knows.”
“It’s easier to gauge danger when you have a face and a countenance to analyze.”
“It’s easier when it comes from a friendly face; familiarity helps in vulnerable moments.”
“She might miscalculated the sun’s different reflections on windows.”
“Depending on the direction, she might not actually see into people’s windows, (could be why a sudden change of clothes, seasonal change, sun position change) and might think it’s the same for her direction.”
“I doubt it’s attention seeking, so dont act like a stalker, just be nice and kind.”
“If they freak out, at least you know you were honorable and kind.” ~ saskskua
“As a girl who is often nude at home, just let her be.”
“I wouldn’t care if you or anyone else could see.”
“Call me crazy, but I’m not going to live my private life differently for y’all.”
“Floor-to-ceiling windows are expensive, and where I live, sunshine/daylight is absolutely crucial.”
“She probably has blinds; if she cared, she’d use them.”
“She doesn’t care.” ~ West-Ingenuity-2874
“YWNBTAH or NTA.”
“I would want to know and would appreciate being informed.”
“Though I almost think it would be better if it were a note or letter, because she will get flustered thinking about all the things she has done, and that you have seen it.”
“Writing a letter may make her disassociate you ‘watching’ her with you, so it might preserve the neighborly friendship.” ~ brilor123
“I realized I was the naked neighbour after reading something that read ‘everyone has a naked neighbor, and if you don’t have a naked neighbor, then you are probably the naked neighbor.’”
“I know it sounds cheesy, but it actually got me thinking.”
“I’ve never had any naked neighbors… but I definitely walk around our apartment wearing little to no clothes often.”
“And sometimes the curtains are open.”
“To be honest, even when they’re closed, they’re the pretty lacey/sheer style curtains, so it’s not like they do much more than look cute.”
“I had always rationalized it by thinking that I was far enough away from the windows so surely nobody could really see me, but after conducting an experiment, I realized that was not true.”
“Maybe she just needs to read the same quote. 🤷🏻♀️.” ~ offputtingangel
“I know that what I do in my apartment is visible at certain angles, and I still don’t care at all if my neighbors can see me walking around naked.”
“I close the blinds if I’m doing the dirty in my living room, but that’s about it.”
“YWNBTA but also NAH… if it really bothers you, you could say something… otherwise just don’t look, I don’t know what else to tell you.” ~ nothanks1312
“Some of this advice is just plain awful.”
“You should tell her in case either she is not aware or there are other people who can see into her appt as their intentions might not be as wholesome as yours.”
“Rather than telling her face-to-face, making her feel judged or causing embarrassment, you should write a note and slip it under her door.”
“If she doesn’t change her behavior afterwards, then she was obviously aware and didn’t care.” ~ GiveUsRobinHood
“I live in Norway.”
“Have no curtains in the bedroom, rarely roll down the shades (just in summer for sleep).”
“I am quite high over other buildings, so not a direct close look into my windows, but someone from a distance can see me in my room if I am by the window.”
“I sleep naked and walk naked daily, and don’t give much f**k.”
“Here, almost no one has curtains; you just don’t look into people’s homes, and if you happen to see someone naked, you just look the other way.”
“Even if someone would tell me they saw me naked in my bedroom, I would just still not bother with curtains 😅.” ~ be_kind_to_yourself_
“NAH. On one hand, I don’t really care about seeing naked people.”
“I’ve worked in a field that required me to see people in their underwear.”
“Nudist-type events I’m fine with.”
“On the other hand, I can’t stand non-consensual exhibitionists.”
“It’s called a private life for a reason.” ~ Ok_Work7396
“A few years ago, a female radio host in Australia said she received an anonymous note telling her that her privacy-tinted windows don’t provide privacy after dark.”
“She was horrified by the realisation of the live shows she had provided to her neighbours.”
“Curtains were promptly purchased.”
“As embarrassed as she was, she did prefer to be informed.”
“And yes, her embarrassment did include her ignorance of how privacy tint works.” ~ Icy_Bowl
“I lived in an apartment in New York City, the bedroom faced an air shaft.”
“I could not see through the window across, one floor down below me, and mistakenly believed that the apartment across and one floor up would not be able to see into my bedroom either.”
“Turns out he got quite a free show until he let me know.”
“I was embarrassed, but I was glad to know.” ~ nameexistalready
“NAH. Personally, I wouldn’t give a f**k if people can see me naked in my house.”
“I didn’t steal these t*ts or this a**, and I got nothing to hide.”
“It’s just a human body, and it’s not that deep.”
“I personally don’t think there’s anything scandalous about nudity or bodily functions.”
“I wouldn’t bring it up if I were you, but a heads up in case she cares about this sort of thing wouldn’t make you a butthole.”
“This is just my personal opinion, but a letter would make it come across 1000x more creepy than just straight up ‘Hey, just to let you know your apartment is visible through your windows from other apartments.'”
“I don’t know if this bothers you, but I just wanted to let you know in case it does, and you were not aware.'” ~ blue_forest_blue
“NTA. I had bamboo blinds in my first apartment.”
“A neighbor, whom I’d never met, knocked to let me know that they could see through them.”
“I was extremely grateful.” ~ Frequent_Alfalfa_347
“NAH, but you DO NOT have to tell her.”
“I’m sure she can see your apartment.”
“I’m sure she knows.”
“But she lives in her own place and wants to be comfortable in her own home.”
“She just doesn’t give a crap who is nosy.”
“Just let her do her own thing in her own apartment.” ~ Axilllla
“NTA: Neighbors across from us straight up told us a window in our new house, way up over our door in the foyer, showed right into our bathroom!”
“Got an electric window shade the next day!”
“Yes, embarrassing, but far less mortifying than finding out years or several neighbors later!” ~ JackfruitGuilty6189
“NTA. Just leave a note at her door.”
“She doesn’t need to know who can see her, just that she needs to close her blinds.” ~ Immediate_Shock_1225
“I had a similar situation at the apartment I was in a few years ago.”
“My roommates and I saw our neighbor nude one too many times… lol.”
“We put an anonymous letter under his door, and after that, he started closing his blinds.”
“It’s an uncomfortable conversation to have face-to-face, so I feel like anonymous letters might be better.” ~ StillStrawberryy
Reddit has given you a ton of options, OP.
This is an awkward situation.
Maybe talk to her with a third-party witness, just in case.
Good Luck.