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Guy Gets A Talking To After ‘Distracting’ His Neighbor’s Wife By Working Out In His Backyard

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Exercising in public demands a healthy combination of focus, tolerance for the sun, total commitment and a dash of boldness.

It can feel slightly naked to put one’s body—yes, fully clothed, of course—through all sorts of strange positions and movements while people witness it all go down.

But any embarrassment is usually tempered by the fact that exercise is an important part of a healthy lifestyle. However weird it may look, we agree it’s nothing to be ashamed of, that it’s just an anatomy in motion.

For one Redditor who took the leap into public workouts, however, the results were complicated.

When FillAfterThrowaway, as he goes by on the site, ran into a little snag with his outdoor fitness routine, he posted in the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit to ask for a little feedback.

For this fitness buff, it was all about who was watching: 

“AITA for working out in the backyard ‘in front of’ my neighbour’s wife?”

He began by laying out the setting and the facts. 

“I just moved into a new apartment recently in a shared townhouse. There’s a shared backyard for all tenants to use.”

“My upstairs neighbours are a married couple with a kid. The husband works while the wife is a [stay at home mom], kid’s been going back to school.”

Then he delved into details.

Everything felt normal for awhile. 

“I’ve been working from home several days per week ever since the pandemic hit. I’m really into fitness and I usually tend to get a workout in on my lunch breaks. Since the weather’s still decent enough I go out into the backyard on the patio to do my workouts.”

“I saw the wife a couple times so far and waved hello, but there wasn’t really any vibe I was getting from her at all, nor was I trying to give any signals to her.”

“I’m just out there to work out and keep in shape, not ruin a marriage.”

But after one workout, he had a little chat with his neighbor.  

“Yesterday evening I decided to work out later in the day. I got a text from the husband after I finished showering asking if he could come by to talk. Didn’t think much of it at first so told him to swing by.”

“He came to the door and demanded that I stop working out in the backyard in front of his wife.”

He decided to ask for a bit more explanation.

“I asked him what the problem was he told me that it was distracting his wife. He refused to elaborate but kept going on about how I need to have more respect and be considerate of my neighbours.”

“After warning to not let him catch me in the backyard again he left.”

Anonymous strangers on the internet were asked if and where guilt belongs by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

A majority of responses to the post assured him that his workouts were totally appropriate.

“NTA- Her husband is being ridiculous. If your workouts are distracting her, that’s not your problem.” — yoginerd76

“F*** this dude, get that sweat on! NTA” — Daymutez

“NTA. That guy has no right to tell you what to do. He may be a dad but he’s not your dad.” — Flownique

Many highlighted the neighbor’s insecurity as the core of the issue.

“bahahahahahahahaaaa. NTA. Dude is just insecure.” — The___Great

“NTA, holy sh** that guy’s insecurity is visible from space.” — rookiespinster

“Wtf NTA. Your neighbor sounds insecure in his marriage. Maybe things aren’t going well. Maybe the wife told him to take his own fitness more seriously. Who knows?”

“Either way, not your problem. Enjoy the shared space you pay for.” — WreckingBallKrug

“NTA! I’m a wife and if a hot guy was working out I’d look but my husband would be secure enough not to blame/shame/ask the person to stop working out.”

“You have equal rights. Please do not let his insecurities dictate your actions.” — firefartingkitten

Others didn’t find the neighbor’s security so amusing. Rather, they raised concerned speculations about his relationship with his wife. 

“NTA, but I hope that his wife is safe.” — goodgollyOHmy

“NTA dude sounds like a controlling a**. Don’t antagonize him, he’ll take it out on her.” — WritPositWrit

“NTA but there is a possibility the wife is being abused by her controlling and jealous husband, so the situation is not as amusing as it might as first appears, i.e. let’s all laugh at the crazy demand of the neighbour.” — GlencoraPalliser

And finally, multiple people advised taking the threat very seriously and reporting it somehow in case things were to escalate later on. 

NTA. I’m assuming you both share a landlord. I’d let them know that they aren’t properly sharing the space and are asking you to forfeit your privileges that come with the apartment.”

“Hopefully you’ll have them on your side if the husband tries anything stupid.” — airnomadmars

“NTA. Get him to text you what he said and take it to your landlord” — periwinkle_cupcake

“NTA. contact the landlord immediately, to begin communication about this.” — m_lanterman

However the situation resolves, we hope the original poster can remain in fighting trim through the Fall and onward into Winter.

Written by Eric Spring

Eric Spring lives in New York City. He has poor vision and cooks a good egg. Most of his money is spent on live music and produce. He usually wears plain, solid color sweatshirts without hoods because he assumes loud patterns make people expect something big. Typically, he'll bypass a handshake and go straight for the hug.