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Woman Balks After Visiting Family Members Demand She Let Them Sleep In Her King-Sized Bed

Woman sleeping in king size bed
Kelvin Murray/Getty Images

Ahh, sleep. One of the best parts of the day.

Unless, of course, you’re forced to sleep in a different bed while your guests are in your bed.

At least that’s how Redditor and self-proclaimed “brick sh*t house” bedsaredumb feels.

The Original Poster (OP) had some guests visiting who requested to sleep in her bed.

Her disagreement drove her to subReddit “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) to ask,

“WIBTA if I don’t let my family member and their fiancé sleep in my bed when they come to visit?”

She went on to explain.

“I [37-year-old female] am about to have two visitors to my apartment in a couple of weeks [male age 42, female age 39].”

“I have a king bed that I sleep in, and I have a queen-sized Murphy bed that is in my office. The couple will be staying a night at my place before continuing on their road trip.”

“For additional context, I’m 6’0 and built like a brick sh*t house, and this couple is both over six feet and in the very overweight/very large category.”

“The issue — the couple asked to spend the night, and I said, sure, I have a bed. They asked if they could have my bed — the king size — and I said no.”

“This led to a ‘we’d be more comfortable before our road trip if we got to sleep in the bigger bed.’ I said, ‘you have a queen size bed or an air mattress as your options at my place — take your pick.’”

“They called me an a**hole and said they would discuss it further closer to the date of their arrival.”

“WIBTA for not letting them sleep in my bed?’

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided: NTA

“NTA. It’s really weird to request a specific bed for when someone is doing you a favor.” – lcyhrty

Agree with this one. NTA.”

“If they really want a bigger bed, they are always free to go to a hotel.”

“If they want accommodations for free, then they should be prepared to accept whatever is offered them by the host who is kind enough to let them stay the night free of charge.” – Lopsided-Month1636

“NTA Sounds like they would be more comfortable staying at a hotel, so you should suggest that It is seriously bizarre to me to ask someone to sleep in their bed, especially when a guest bed is offered.”

“The only exceptions I can see to this would be very elderly or infirm” – a2b2021

“Even if somebody TOLD me to sleep in their bed/bedroom, I would decline and take the guest room.”

“Let alone when they’re already letting you crash at their house (assumedly for free), and there is a perfectly good queen bed in a guest room.”

“It is downright weird to request staying in their personal bed instead.”

“If their size is that much of a problem, one could sleep in the queen bed, and the other could sleep on the air mattress on the floor for one night.”

“These people sound like completely ungrateful a**holes” – Proppur

“Definitely NTA. I have a two-bed house, mine and my husband’s bedroom has a king-size bed, and the spare room has a queen bed.”

“We both have big families, and we wanted a three-bed house so we could have an extra spare room which also would be a computer room.”

“Instead, this house has an extra room downstairs, so that’s the computer room. We put the IKEA hemnes daybed in there as a sofa but means it can double as an extra space for guests.”

“Then we got a rescue dog who sleeps in that room every night.”

“She’s a lot due to her past, so husband and I give up our own bed to guests, and we have the interrupted night sleep with OUR dog.”

“The last two occasions, our guests have tried talking us into them sleeping downstairs so we don’t lose our bed.”

“On both occasions, I’ve had no more than 5 hours of sleep because my dog likes to lick my face throughout the night.”

“I can’t cope thinking my guests have that instead even if they say they don’t mind, I do!” – abbysuzie96

“NTA, I don’t get why some people insist on sleeping in the main bedroom as guests (even if it has a bigger bed).”

“Someone’s room is a personal, private, and safe place. OP, I wouldn’t let them stay.”

“Especially with how dismissive they were (“We’ll discuss closer to our arrival”). There is no discussion.” – Asian_Blonde451

“Yeah, I love my parents and both sets of in-laws, but we’ve made it clear that our house isn’t a hotel, and if they want to visit, we will not be giving up any of our beds and camping out in the living room when there are several perfectly nice hotels in the area for them to use.”

“We’ve recently had to start being firmer about this boundary because my daughter (9) just got upgraded from a twin to a queen bed, and apparently, people thought that meant her bed was available when they come to visit, and she’d just sleep on the couch.”

“We told them, ’absolutely not. that’s her room and her bed.’ She’s 9, not 3, and I’m not putting her out on the couch in her pajamas, where everyone will be walking through her living room ’bedroom.’”

“She’s getting closer to puberty and all that. She needs her space. We told the parents they’re free to camp on the couches though since it’s ’so not a big deal!”

“Interestingly, they declined and got a hotel 🤔🤷‍♀️” – Ashley9225

NTA. I’d reconsider hosting them. They are entitled to the degree that they made an absurd request.”

“You refused it. They doubled down and did not accept your “no.” To them, kicking you out of your bed and your room is not just reasonable but expected. What else would be expected?”

“I’m wondering if there’s some reason they would want unfettered access to your bedroom. Do you keep valuables, family heirlooms, or large amounts of cash in there?”

“When you host people who don’t respect you or your boundaries, then you, and everything you own, is at risk while they are there.”

“At the very least, set up cameras everywhere, especially in your room.”

“If they’re so big that only a king size will do, it sounds like a hotel is the only solution.”

“One of my rules is never to host entitled a-holes.”  – AdOne8433

Tell them to get a hotel.”

“You are providing them with a roof and warmth at no cost. They shouldn’t be choosy beggars.”

“NTA” -AtomicHobbit

Dude, NTA.”

“If someone asked to stay at my house AND demanded to sleep in my bed AND THEN called me an a-hole for saying no, they’d be uninvited pretty quickly.” – Big-Cloud-6719

“NTA. They have some audacity to ask for your bed when they come to visit. I have never had a guest ask that, and if they did, they would no longer be welcomed in my home as a guest.” – Such-Awareness-2960

“You know your not TA. Grow a spine and tell the to f*ck off” – trankbluegirl78

“‘We’d be more comfortable before our road trip if we got to sleep in the bigger bed.’”

“Then pay for a king-sized bed at a hotel. NTA.” – TerrifyinglyAlive

“‘I said no. This led to a “we’d be more comfortable before our road trip if we got to sleep in the bigger bed.”’”

“lol they care more about their own comfort than yours, call you an a**hole, and then said ’they would discuss it further closer to the date of their arrival’ as if they aren’t taking ‘no’ for an answer?”

“How about their arrival to a hotel room? NTA” – StonewallBrigade21


“It is not theirs. They are not entitled to it. They are lucky you were even offering your house as a place for them to stay. They sound ungrateful.” – MercyXXVII


“If they don’t like what you’re offering, they can pay for a hotel or an Airbnb.” – avocadosdontbite

“NTA – You are already opening up your house for them. They can sleep in their car if they don’t like a queen bed. You are already beyond welcoming.”

“I would tell them to pound sand and find a hotel room if they want a bigger bed. I would make up an excuse and be gone that day.”

“They sound super entitled. Are they going to expect you to cook and clean up their mess as well?” – Nova-316

“Alternatively, they could stay somewhere else.” – AcuteDeath2023


“I was anticipating a “they’re not married, so no sharing a bed” type of post, but wowzers. Sorry your family member is such a rude AH.” – Maleficent-Spinach37

NTA, at all. If they want to get all choose, they can get a hotel and pick whatever d*mn bed they want. A person’s bed is like a hug, it can be offered but never demanded.”

“They’re rude AF” – echoCashMeOusside

Hopefully, this couple can learn some guest etiquette before their stay.

Written by B. Miller

B. is a creative multihyphenate who enjoys the power and versatility of the written word. She enjoys hiking, great food and drinks, traveling, and vulnerable conversation. Raised below the Mason Dixon, thriving above it. (she/her)