Over on Reddit's "Am I the A**hole" (AITA) people ask if what they did made them a jerk.
But sometimes the difference between being a jerk and a minor prank is closer than you'd think.
Redditor Bird_and_Toast shared an incident where he maybe could have done something nicer, but was his choice really so mean?
To find out, the original poster (OP) asked AITA users if they could judge what he did.
He asked:
"AITA for recording instead of reminding my wife when a bird was eating her toast?"
Reminding his wife of what, you may ask?
"I have a rather light-hearted story to share. We had a laugh and got over it but my wife insisted I was deliberately being an ass."
"My wife recently got addicted to a game called Cookie Run and had been on her tablet whenever she could."
"The children were at their grandparents for the weekend. We woke up to a fine weather on Saturday and I made toasts for both of us."
"My wife was as usual, busy on her tablet that she did not touch her toast at all even after I have finished with it."
"After I came back from washing the plates I saw that a bird had flown in and was on the table looking hungrily at my wife's toast. My wife was still on her tablet and was clueless when the bird carefully approached her plate and started eating at her toast."
"I quickly whipped out my phone and recorded this precious moment of the bird pecking at the toast while my wife was still drinking coffee and playing on her tablet in an arm's length, completely oblivious to its demise."
"It lasted for around a whole minute when the bird decided it had enough and flew off. It was only then that I ended the recording and reminded my wife what had just happened."
"She didn't believe it until I showed her the video and we both laughed, but she still called me an a** for recording instead of reminding her. I discarded the remains of the poor toast and made her a new one."
"We shared the video with the children later on and my wife complained to them(in a light hearted way) how I deliberately let it happen."
"In my defense, it was her own responsibility to protect her breakfast from the predatory birds, and she cannot blame me for not recording this moment that we can laugh at for years to come."
"So, AITA?"
OP's little prank lost his wife her original toast, but he kindly made a new one. However, he did choose to record a video rather than doing anything about the bird.
Redditors judged whether OP was a jerk by including one of the following in their response:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You're the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
The commenters easily determined that no one was a jerk. OP might have taken video instead of warning his wife, but she also thought the joke was pretty funny.
It's nice when no one is actually at fault.
"NAH. If you did anything wrong it was verbalising the situation to her rather than just messaging the video to her ipad, which would have been way more hilarious."
"To be fair to your wife, you did let it deliberately happen, but we all must make sacrifices for comedy." - _Kenndrah_
"NAH. Wholesome AF. Glad you two have a good-natured relationship. I would've videoed too!" - Expat_89
"NAH, the only way you could've been a teensy lil baby AH is if there was no more bread to make another piece of toast, which doesn't seem to be the case here."
"Tbh if this was my partner and I, I'd have recorded instead of saying anything too." - dangeroussequence
"NAH. That's really funny! As there was no real harm in the bird eating the toast for either the toast-haver or the bird, there's absolutely no harm in videotaping it instead of saying 'hey honey, there's a bird eating your toast!'."
"Honestly, sometimes you gotta do what makes for the better story. In this case, it's letting a random bird eat your wife's toast while you videotape it."
"I hope the bird had a nice breakfast." - The-Moocat
"NTA."
"I've made the "do I help my kid or take a picture" choice and bet your butt I took the picture."
"(She was 3, sitting in a hollow ottoman, butt inside, legs over the side but couldn't pull herself out. She wasn't afraid or in danger, she just looked goofy and was giggling, I rarely grab my phone for photos, but it was too cute)."
"Sometimes, precious moments are cute and awkward. Also if she was paying attention, it wouldn't have happened." - Princesssassafras
Of course, many appreciated the story for the humorous tale it was.
"That last paragraph reminds of the Kanye tweet: 'I hate when I'm on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle'."
"As you say it is a very light hearted and funny story, but keeping with the usual mood of this subreddit: You are an AH and your wife should divorce you and seek therapy" - HamidiateEffect
"YTA"
"1.You claim you have video if a cute moment, but do not share it."
"2.You threw away the toast instead of throwing it outside so the bird could eat it." - DarcyKnits
"Once upon a time, I was sitting in the kitchen doing homework while my mom was in the living room watching tv and eating Chex mix."
"At that time, we had a cat that was obsessed with people food (her favorites being bananas and Pringles, but really anything salty would do). My mom put a pretzel on the foot stool for the cat—she licked off all the salt, then went off to do cat things."
"My dad then walked into the room to talk to my mom. We both watched in amused horror as he picked up the pretzel and ate it (neither of us told him the truth about its origins)."
"In summary-NAH. If you had let your wife eat the bird-pecked toast, you could conceivably be the a**hole." - ecstaticeggplnt
OP updated their post with a quick thanks for the camaraderie.
"Thank you for all the comments, my family had a good laugh reading them!"
"Regretfully, I cannot share the video for privacy reasons(and for my own safety, wife is reading this too)."
It's nice to have a fun story every so often where all the involved parties understand where they stand.















Woman Asks If It's Wrong To Cancel Date After He Makes Too Many Sexual Comments
Dating can be really hard, because let's be honest, as fun as it's supposed to be, there are some very strange prospects out there.
While some might just be socially awkward, there are definitely some walking red flags, ready to push every boundary, cautioned the members of the "Am I Overreacting?" (AIO) subReddit.
Redditor Suspicious_End_441 had been talking to a guy for a little while and was planning to go on a first date with him when he started sending her increasingly inappropriate text messages.
But when his texts went far past her comfort zone, especially for someone she'd never met, the Original Poster (OP) planned to call off the date and truly never meet the guy in real life.
She asked the sub:
The OP had been talking to a guy and was looking forward to going on a first date with him.
"For context, I (30 Female) met this guy online and have been talking to him the past few days."
"He asked me out, and we planned a date for today. He seems really nice so far."
"I like him, but he’s made a couple of comments that maybe seem like a red flag to me."
"First off, I did my nails for the date, and he asked me to send him a picture, so I did."
"Then he made some comment like, 'Those would look great wrapped around something.'"
"I kinda brushed it off because I know that’s how some guys are... but it did give me the ick a little."
"Then I asked him to tell me more about himself, and the second thing he told me was that he has a high sex drive."
The potential date texted:
The OP no longer liked the idea of dating the guy.
"Don’t get me wrong, I’m no prude, but this made me slightly uncomfortable. I’m wondering what reason you would need to tell this to someone you haven’t even met yet."
"I didn’t think he would be expecting sex on a first date, but this made me rethink."
"I’m also recovering from a surgery that I had three weeks ago, and he knows this. So that literally isn’t even an option for me, not that I would wanna do that on a first date anyway."
The OP considered never meeting the guy in person.
"I kind of feel like he’s making too many sexual comments too quickly, especially considering I didn’t engage with his first comment at all."
"Am I overreacting, feeling like I maybe want to cancel the date and block him?"
"I just feel like these comments are an indicator of his expectations... or maybe he is just 'being a guy'?"
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
Some had second-hand "ick" from reading that text message.
"NOR. My face when I read that text: [Dan Levy from 'Schitt's Creek']" - Unlikely_Captain_499
"I’d nope out right after the nails comment. After I blast him for being completely out of line." - WHYohWhy__MEohMY
"If he’s that comfortable saying stuff like that before he meets you, imagine what he’ll say after he knows you better." - ScrambledNoggin
"Gross. That joke should be saved for wife or long-term girlfriend where you know you'll get a laugh... or more accurately, an eye-roll and a 'threat' to not sleep with him for the next three months, LOL." - HovercraftIII1258
"Every time I get my nails done, my husband says something similar to that, and I always reply, 'I think they'd look good jammed in your eye sockets,' and we both laugh, LOL. But we've been married for over a decade. When we met and when we were dating, he was incredibly polite and possibly TOO slow in making advances. THIS is gross." - wingin_it0618
"This is exactly what I expect as a response from a man heavily in the dating scene right now. Like, sex is fine, but this guy really couldn't wait to go out on the date that was already set up and chill for ONE d**n night? If the girl is into you, it will happen when it happens. It says to me like he has no self-control." - BrayIsreal
"If he's giving you the ick, listen to that. It's not going to go away. Don't waste your own time or his. Plenty more fish in the sea, girl." - Zieglest
"As a man who is heavily in the dating world right now, that sounds like such a turn off, and any self-respecting girl who wants an actual relationship would not even talk to him anymore after this. It's so cringey and makes all of us guys look like there's no reason we want to go out with them other than getting laid. As a guy, it's really annoying; it makes girls weirded out by all of us. Sigh."
"Like, sex is fine, but this guy really couldn't wait to go out on the date that was already set up and chill for ONE d**n night? If the girl is into you, it will happen when it happens. It says to me like he has no self-control."
"That was the dumbest thing he could say to kill his chances. I wouldn't bother with him." - BrayIsReal
"NOR, I wouldn’t want to go anymore either. Making multiple sexual comments before even meeting someone is purposeful, and I doubt he remembers that you can’t do anything due to your surgery or even considers whether you want to."
"Don’t brush off how your gut makes you feel. If you are uncomfortable, then you are under no obligation to go." - AliBari
Others urged the OP to listen to her gut, not to go on that date, and to immediately block the guy.
"If he is already this forward, making sexual comments to a complete stranger, then it will only increase from here; he’s not going to suddenly stop. OP, if he already makes you feel uncertain or pressured, then don’t bother." - saiphxo
"Your gut is telling you something and wants to keep you safe. Don't ignore it." - SparkEli1
"Stay far, far away from this guy. Block. Don't look back. Men like this use high sex drive as a disclaimer for zero boundaries later." - CompetitionLankys
"Trust your intuition. Don’t go."
"I (39 Female) am very comfortable with casual sex and hook-ups. When single, I have never needed an emotional connection with a man to let off some steam. I don’t need him to make me feel special or like we have potential. I don’t need to know his hopes and dreams. I separate men into 'just sex' and 'potential for more' easily."
"I do need him to show the most basic level of respect and not be a creep. I would stop talking to this guy the instant he started speaking like that, even if my intention was to just f**k him."
"We are already talking, we are already about to go on a date, why is he turning it creepy sexual, what is that doing for either of us. It just speaks to a lack of judgment, I wouldn’t want to trust. If he can’t handle a basic text conversation without being a creep, why would I trust him to be alone with me?" - TheCa11ousB**h
"Ok, so I'm a degenerate, but even I wouldn't say something like 'those would look good wrapped around something' to a person I'd never met."
"I mean... do I have to be dad here and say the obvious? It's some guy on the internet who's looking to f**k. Is that really what you want? He can't even be bothered to type the d in the word 'and.'"
"Also, your nails look cool." - skippybeefree
"I’m more insulted that it’s just a terribly uncreative line. This guy's a bum!"
"Also, it's a huge red flag is the first thing he describes himself as a clean freak and needs things done his way. Sounds like a control freak, which would make me dip out immediately." - JeromeBarkley
"Only you know what you need to do. Feel safe. Feel comfortable. Feel SAFE!"
"If you don't, then cancel."
"Some men (I am a man) sometimes say way too much way too soon, and some men don't know how to hold a decent conversation. Sometimes just telling them how you feel about the sexual comments and seeing his reaction will tell you more than anything else he has ever said to you up until this point."
"But always remember you can choose to back out at any point in a date, even if you turn up to have dinner but can't walk in. The same goes for him as well if he turns up but doesn't walk in. We all have the right to feel safe and comfortable, especially on a first date." - Ok_goal6591
It was possible that the guy was just excited about the date, nervous to talk to someone new, socially awkward, or just joking at an inappropriate level.
Unfortunately, though, it was much more likely that these comments indicated the guy's expectations for the first date and how he would treat the OP if she set boundaries, especially regarding his inability to perform after surgery for safety reasons.
While it would be fun to meet someone new, it was much safer for the OP to wait for someone else.