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Woman Furious After Friends Fail To Save Her A Plate Of Food At A Party She Arrived Late To

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Redditor Gyldanie is a 30-year-old woman who is a tattoo artist.

When her shift at work ran later than expected on the same night she was invited to a dinner party, she followed proper etiquette by letting her friends know she would arrive later and also made a contribution to the party.

Things did not pan out well for her by the time she got there.

When she was accused of overreacting to the unfortunate situation, she visited the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit and asked:


The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“Hi. I work as a tattoo artist.”

“My friends were going to have a fun party on Saturday. A friend… Let’s call her Lola was boasting all week about delicious dish she makes out of lemon juice, shrimps and cucumbers.”

“I was so looking forward to try it.”

“Saturday I got work, it’s early and my tattoo is going to take more time than needed.”

“I send a message and tell them Im coming late, and if they could save me a little food. Specially some of the shrimp dish Lola made. Maybe a little plate.”

“I get a lot of messages like hey the party is bout to start and I respond telling them I’ll arrive 2 hours after. And reminded them I am exhausted and starving.”

“I finish my tattoo. Call them and ask if they need anything. They ask for some sauces, ice and a full pack of beers. I am exhausted and hungry.”

“Get to the party. Give all the beer. NO FOOD.”

“Anything. No chips, no meals, no nothing.”

“Just beers plus the ones that I brought. I ask if I had been saved a little plate since I asked them several times.”

“Lola just tells me that well since I arrived late I shouldn’t expect to get served stuff.”

“That if I want there are some leftovers of cucumber and lemon juice for me to try of the dish to taste. That I could fill myself up. Literally 3 cucumbers pieces, onions and lemon juice in the tray.”

“I honestly felt humiliated and disrespected. Besides they could have told me like… Hey we know you’ve been working and you stopped at the store, there is no food left for you please bring something for you to eat.”

“I was so sad, hangry and tears began pouring my eyes. Didn’t say a thing but my face obviously screamed I was so mad.”

“I hate to feel like I’m begging for food. I bought a bunch of alcohol for them (I don’t even drink myself).”

“I took myself outside to go get a meal. Not coming back to the party. I was fuming…”

“People told me AITA for wanting food and getting late, besides I was making a scene.”

“I was honestly disappointed and emotional but Lola’s comment about being filled up by left over onions just broke me.”

The OP clarified some details.

“It was not a big party. Just like a get together of probably 8 people.”

“Each was supposed to bring something. I told them I’d probably get late so I would bring extra booze and anything that was lacking by the time i was coming.”

“Days prior to get together. All communication went though a chat group and everyone could see everyones text.”

“So al least 6 people saw my texts about being at work, not having eaten, expected to be saved something, me bringing booze.”

Strangers on the internet were asked to declare one of the following:

  • NTA – Not the A**hole
  • YTA – You’re the A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everybody Sucks Here

Plenty of Redditors sided with the OP as not the a**hole for reacting the way she did.

“Your ‘friends’ are pretty callous and thoughtless.”

“You can try telling them ‘hey, I was stopping at the store, all you had to do was tell me there was no food left and I should pick something up for myself. That would have been considerate.'”

“Alternatively you can present them with a bill for all the alcohol you bought for their party. NTA.” – ParsimoniousSalad

The OP replied:

“I didn’t… Each one of us was bringing something. But I feel like I was used since I brought a bunch of alcohol for everyone and was saved nothing in exchange.”

Redditors continued with their NTA judgments.

“You WERE used. We have a tattoo artist buddy who occasionally has to come late to our get togethers.”

“We save him a plate. Every Time.”

“I’d feel like a failure as a host if this happened at my house!”

“Your friends are all the As. Major As.” – NuvStorm

“NTA, they could have saved you some, and letting you know there were no leftovers would have been the bare minimum. They suck.” – geeseinuniform

“Aww, I feel bad for you. You are NTA.”

“If I was your friend or even the person bragging to you about my dish, I’d be sure to save and guard your food.”

“Food sharing is love, like supporting your continued life.” – perpetuadreaming

“NTA: it’s not like you were out at a prior social event. You were working and every adult gets held up at work sometimes.”

“Any host with a bit of etiquette would have saved you a plate since you asked.”

“Plus, part of the time you were late was because they asked you to run errands. Your friends are rude af.” – valathel

“NTA what kind of crappy party doesn’t have enough food? I’ve literally never had a party that there wasn’t food left over at the end.”

“They either are stingy and didn’t bring enough or greedy to eat it all without saving you any. Then they have the nerve to drink your booze.”

“I would have taken my booze, gotten a burger at the drive through and found new friends.” – 00Lisa00

“NTA. You specifically asked, and because they asked you to bring beer it means they saw your text.”

“In short, you got used, it was a D-move on their part.” – Pohkopf

“NTA. I was the friend that usually had to work later and would show up to parties a couple of hours in.”

“I also don’t drink so high stopped offering to pick up booze on the way, because before I knew it one pack of beer turned into beer, liquor and some mixers.”

“And then became oh yeah just a couple more things. Before I knew it I was wasting so much money.” – littleghostpeep

“NTA, as a host I would always make sure there is food left if I know someone is coming late.” – Ok_Needleworker_5655

“Definitely NTA. Any thoughtful friend would have put two and two together to save you a plate when you said you’d be late WITHOUT YOU ASKING.”

“It’s common courtesy.”

“Also Side Note: They asked for more beer, but had no food? I get that you CAN drink without more snacks, but you SHOULDN’T.”

“When I had friends over, we would at very least have a PLAN to order something so we weren’t all hungover gross messes in the morning. Not only are they careless, they are dumb drinkers.” – mellybelly1023

“NTA. How bloody rude!!”

“Now I’m a girl who loves a buffet. If there is a party with food I’m there.”

“How horrible of them all to not even save you a little of everything knowing you were gonna be late and knowing you’re taking drink and you don’t drink.” – miss-green-eyes37

“NTA, they aren’t your friends. Lola was nasty to you intentionally.”

“They could’ve easily saved food or communicated with you either way but chose to only do so for their own gain.”

“Her snarky comment shows the malicious intent of deriving you of the bragged about food to humiliate you.” – StardustJojo13

“NTA. Maybe if you showed up late and cried for food then yes, but you told them manyyyy times that you would be late, according to you this was a small party so them saving food isn’t unreasonable.”

“Your friends here are insensitive. You even brought them beer when they asked in response to your text, so either they have selective reading or they saw the other texts asking to save a plate and ignored it.”

“I totally understand the feeling of expectamce and even excitement towards something only to find out it’s not coming true.” – fishing4fish

“NTA: You asked them to save you something knowing you were running late. The least they could have done was say, ‘hey, food is all gone. Just wanted to let you know in case you want to stop for something’.”

“Side question; what kind of party are you going to that involves alcohol and there is NO food left? I’ve never had a party with friends where we ran out of food and snacks.”

“I truly understand why you felt terrible. Also, why did they ask for sauce if there was nothing to go with them?”

“That alone would have made me believe there were things to eat. In my books, if a party is still going, food should be flowing.” – ToxicLogics

Overall, Redditors thought the OP’s frustration was warranted, especially after she communicated to her friends she was running late to the party and was bringing beer for everyone.

The OP returned with an update.


“Thanks a lot for your kind words everyone.”

“I will be reconsidering how much of a doormat I am willing to be and I’ll make sure this never happens again in the future.”

“Sending luv!”

“P.S. Just save food for your friends people!”

Written by Koh Mochizuki

Koh Mochizuki is a Los Angeles based actor whose work has been spotted anywhere from Broadway stages to Saturday Night Live.
He received his B.A. in English literature and is fluent in Japanese.
In addition to being a neophyte photographer, he is a huge Disney aficionado and is determined to conquer all Disney parks in the world to publish a photographic chronicle one day. Mickey goals.
Instagram: kohster Twitter: @kohster1 Flickr: nyckmo