The beginning of a relationship is an exciting phase that is full of discoveries as couples become more intimately acquainted.
However, those discoveries can either bring love birds closer together or leave them running in the opposite direction.
A guy who had been dating someone for eight months recently got to know his girlfriend really well, and it caused him to take “paws.”
Not knowing how to feel about her after a certain revelation, Redditor ThrowRA20202004 went to Reddit’s Relationship Advice subReddit to ask about a possible incompatibility issue.
The Original Poster (OP) wrote:
“My (24 M[ale]) girlfriend (26 F[emale]) fully believes that she is a cat in a human’s body.”
“gf [girlfriend] now thinks she is an otherkin, a cat in a human’s body and refuses to see anything wrong with the situation. The echo chamber she is in now has done nothing but enable her and I don’t know what to do.”
The OP also informed Redditors that he had no intention of offending anyone with his genuine concern.
“I know people are going to think I’m either trolling or baiting but please read before you comment + this post has nothing to do with gender or trans issues and I am in no way intending to be offensive or anything.”
“So Gf and I have been together for nearly 8 months, and she’s always been a very quirky and nerdy person: does cosplays, very into anime and roleplaying, etc… Nothing too weird.”
“We’ve been kinda distant lately with everything going on and me being an essential worker so haven’t seen each other and only talk for half an hour a day.”
“Well, last tuesday we got to hang out at her place and she wore cat ears a and a belt with a tail the entire time.”
“At first I thought it was either going to be a sex surprise or her testing a new cosplay, but nope, she sat me down, asked me if I really do love her, then hit me with a very long monologue that essentially summed up to ‘I’m a cat in a human body’.”
“Wish I was joking.”
“I thought I misunderstood and then believed that maybe it was a weird joke but she kept being serious about it, and doubling down. I left shortly after because I had a shift at work, and I still believed it was an oddly drawn out joke nothing more.”
“She ended up texting me with resources to help me understand, which is when I realized that she really is serious. Apparently she believes she is an otherkin: a person who holds the belief that they are not human.”
“She says she was introduced to this by one of her friends months ago and has since joined discords and communities of others like her.”
“Her friend believes he is a demon trapped in a human body, and she sent me a testimonial that was supposed to be touching but its basically just about a dude thinking he is naruto.”
“I’m not joking.”
“She explained her otherkin type as being a cat, and now she 100% thinks she is a cat. How did she know she was a cat you ask?”
“According to her: sleeping a lot, liking the sun, hating water, feeling more comfortable crawling on all fours, and claiming to understand what cats are saying and being able to talk to them through meowing.”
“She has also apparently been distant with nearly everybody we know [in real life] as I got multiple messages asking me to let her know to be in touch with them.”
The girlfriend’s personal awakening adversely began affecting her social life.
“My head has been spiraling this past week, I keep thinking its a joke but nope she is deathly serious about this and has handed in her two weeks resignation at her job because cats don’t work.”
“Again, I wish I was joking. I’ve been limiting my interactions with her ever since, because this is hurting my head a whole lot and I just can’t cope.”
“She has also surrounded herself with a large amount of yes men and women who support her 100% and are enabling this, some even encouraging her to make a patreon and make otherkin content that they would contribute to, which she brought up when I asked her about quitting her job.”
“To make things worse, I can’t discuss this with anyone in real life because I know how crazy it sounds and I know that leaving her is a valid option but I’m in love with this woman and now I don’t recognize her and I know that there is something very very wrong and I can’t reach out to her and she refuses to hear anything from me unless it is unconditional support.”
“What the f’k do i do ?”
Redditors were quick to notice that—by the girlfriend claiming she “talked” to other cats through meowing—she was not a cat, since adult domesticated housecats meow exclusively with humans as a form of communication.
Adult feral housecats use a language of chirps and trills, something a cat should know.
“That’s definitely the biggest hole in her story.” – dagonesque
“Wait if that’s how she communicates with cats…..That would mean dundundun she’s a human!!! OP let her know immediately!!” – gibbardsexual
“Probably heavily researched cat otherkins, but never researched actual cats.” – OpeningFox5
Many Redditors either balked at her new identity or had genuine concerns for the girlfriend’s mental health.
“There it is, full confirmation that she isn’t a cat.”
“Cats meow for humans. Cats meow at her. She is a human.”
“If this post is true, I severely overestimated human intelligence. The level of cringe is astonishing. OP, your girlfriend is a laughing stock.”
“I find it impossible to believe, because I’m a rational person. I can’t wrap my head around how somebody could believe that they can convince somebody they’re a cat.”
“She doesn’t believe that she is a cat, she thinks that people will think she’s cool for being different. She thinks she can convince others that she’s a cat, because of her echo chamber.” – poop-machines
“I don’t think it’s an intelligence thing, I definitely think it’s a mental thing and OP is kind for wanting to stay in contact to make sure she doesn’t have a mental break.”
“I haven’t done any research into otherkin, but in the Netflix show ‘Glow’ there is a character who identifies as a wolf in a very similar manner.”
“The way I saw it, her wolf persona created a safe place for her and allowed her to explore the world in a way that she felt secure, like putting on a set of armor.”
“I know it’s just a fictional show, but it sounds similar to OP’s now-ex. Maybe something happened to her? But the echo chamber definitely doesn’t help.” – DianeForTheNguyen
“I’m thinking from a psychological standpoint, would this be considered a sort of depersonalization? Severe anxiety and traumatic experiences are the main causes of depersonalization.”
“If you decide to stick this out, which is of course up to you, somehow she’ll need to deal with the source of her mental issues to reintegrate her psyche, likely with your help.” – mykittyhitsme
As an ultimatum, Redditor darthvadercake suggested for the OP to see how long she can “walk the walk” to determine if the relationship is over.
“I would probably go one of two ways:”
“Treat her like a cat. A real cat. Like she claims she is. So no more dinners, she can eat catfood from a tin.”
“No more sex (cats don’t have sex with humans) no more sleeping in a bed, no more using the toilet or shower. She can clean herself – like cats do – and sh*t in a cat litter.”
“See how long she lasts in her identity until she truly gets fed up with all of it.”
“Point out to her that cats and humans can’t have sexual or romantic relationships and as such you can’t stay together.”
Another Redditor informed darthvadercake that forcing the girlfriend to such an extreme—where she is denied sanitation and food—is abuse.
darthvadercake responded, “That is fair feedback” and clarified their earlier suggestion.
“Just to add a bit more nuance, I didn’t necessarily mean you would physically stop or threaten her with those things. Just providing criticism when she does.”
“So not ‘you’re not allowed to shower’ more like ‘you took a shower? That doesn’t seem very catlike. Why aren’t you cleaning yourself like cats do?'”
“There’s probably a line between ‘testing’ her commitment and allowing her to see how insane ‘cat life’ truly would be, and letting delusions go on for an extended period of time.”
“If after 3-4 days of pointing out hypocrisies and subjecting her to what cats really would do, she is actually becoming more cat like and going along with those rules, that would be 100% the time to get her help from a medical professional.”
The overwhelmed OP updated his post and said he was expecting a lot of the comments to claim that he was “crazy.”
After thanking people who commented, he addressed a few things.
“Her and I have been friends for 2+ years prior to dating, so that is why I am reluctant to just up and leave.”
“I’ve read a comment asking if she has a history of mental illness, and not to my knowledge? Aside from her being diagnosed with mild social anxiety in high school.”
“I am going to try and reach out to her mom to get her to check up on her, and maybe even visit. They have a good relationship, so maybe that will help.”
“Yesterday was the first time I truly confronted what was going on, as I have been kind of shelving it and just praying and hoping it was some kind of drawn out joke.”
“But now that I’ve had time to truly ponder it, I think it has been a long time coming.”
“She’s been buying a lot of cat memorabilia and a lot of her cosplays are cat related, and when I brought up the possibility of me getting a cat in the near future she made a joke about being too territorial for a cat, and now that I think about it…well, yeah.”
“I don’t know who demon man really is, all I know is that he has been part of her virtual DnD group since last year.”
“Also so far no litterbox in the picture, sorry to disappoint/relieve some of you. When I asked her about her plans as a ‘cat’ other than quitting her job, she had sent me her to do list which I didn’t bother opening or reading until yesterday because I was too busy wishing all of this was a fever dream.”
“The To do list includes purchasing a scratch post for her nails, switching to a carnivore diet, and dying her hair red because she is a ginger cat. Yup.”
“As much as it hurts, I have no intention to continue to be in a romantic relationship with her because she will absolutely not hear anything if it’s not 100% support.”
“I love her, but I love myself and I don’t want to be dragged down to something like this especially when it feels like I’m talking to a brick wall.”
“I will however try to remain in contact with her just to make sure she’s not spiraling towards a mental break. I will visit her today to have a talk and officially break it off even though she’s been refusing to see me unless I am completely on board, I will update if anything interesting happens.”
“Then I will buy a couple of bottles of alcohol and down them in my flat, no judgement.”
The OP returned to provide an update to which one Redditor responded:
“Sounds like you ended it in a respectable way, even going as far as to let people in her inner circle know somethings up with her so that they can follow up on how she’s managing.” ~ 3spoopy_5me
Other responses also mentioned OP notified her friends and family after ending the relationship.
But OP’s update was deleted by the subReddit admins for:
“This meets all the criteria for a creative writing exercise.” ~ QueenAnneBoleynTudor
…leaving people to ponder, was there a real situation or was the OP just doing a little pandemic storytelling?
This character seems vaguely familiar…