Double entendre, innuendo, risqué word play are all ways to grab someone’s attention.
That’s why marketing and advertising use it to sell food to furniture to foundations to funerals.
Sex sells, even when there’s no sex involved.
So an online content creator and cosplayer decided to use a little suggestive but ultimately innocent innuendo to share their social media links. But their boyfriend told her to change it.
After arguing over her webpage wording and his demands, the boyfriend turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for support for his position.
No-Philosopher6192 asked:
“AITA for telling my girlfriend (gf) to change her page?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“Okay, so this might sound stupid, but I just need to hear that I’m not the crazy one. My girlfriend (22) does cosplay content online, and so she has a linktree.”
“I want to say here that I have no problem with her content. She doesn’t do nudes, she’s not on OnlyFans, it helps pay the bills, etc…”
“It’s also important to note that my girlfriend is originally from India, and English is her second language.”
“Alright, context out of the way, here is my issue.”
“My gf likes to have fun with her links on linktree. The Patreon link might say ‘Wanna buy me something?’ or ‘Help Support Me!’ or something like that.
“Recently, she made a button that she’s rather proud of that leads to her Twitter.”
“The button says: ‘Wanna C my X?’.”
“Not joking, that’s what it says. She thinks it’s a clever play-on-words because Twitter has changed to X.”
“I told her to change it because it sounds explicitly pornographic. We got in a fight over it. She thinks I’m controlling her, limiting her expression, and so forth.”
“I’m not trying to be a jerk here, but she does online content. This is going to bring the worst creeps from the deepest sewers of the internet to her page and into our lives.”
“Problem is, she’s got friends (for whom English is also 2nd or 3rd language) backing her up, and they’re making me out to be a crazy control-freak.”
“AITA?”
The OP summed up their situation.
“I told my girlfriend to change her page, and I’m being told that I’m being paranoid and controlling.”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors almost unanimously declared the OP was the a**hole (YTA).
“It does sound controlling. She’s not actually offering pornographic content, so I don’t see your issue.”
“Don’t worry, the worst creeps from the deepest sewers message any woman on the internet. It’s not her responsibility to stay offline for your comfort. YTA.” ~ thewhiterosequeen
“It’s sort of up there with being Rick Rolled. You click on it expecting something, then it’s not what you’re expecting but still funny.” ~ sweetpotato_latte
“Exactly. A link with a fun title that goes to her formerly-Twitter X account is not going to make perverts show up where they wouldn’t have before. YTA.” ~ xlovelyloretta
“Exactly, she’s already getting all the worst creeps DMing her just by being a woman content creator. OP seems to think seeing those messages are akin to cheating instead of getting a flood of harassment.”
“He should be supportive and appreciate her cheeky play on words, not piling on like just another a**hole in her life.” ~ vzvv
“YTA. Has she hired you as her social media manager? No? Then it’s really not your business.”
“Besides, if they’ve made it to her linktree, they’re probably familiar with her content to some extent, and understand it’s a joke.”
“Also, it’s not explicitly pornographic, it’s an innuendo, which by definition is the opposite of explicit.” ~ QuailMail
“YTA. You know what brings creeps out in droves to bother women on the internet? Being a woman on the internet. That’s all it takes.” ~ Educational-Shoe2633
However the OP’s question triggered a few men.
They lamented how oppressed they are by women in life and on Reddit.
“Ya’ll never fail to disappoint with your hatred for men.”
“A dude wants his girlfriend to change a link because he thinks it’ll draw more creeps to her social media and you guys think he’s a controlling jerk.”
“But if a girl wanted her boyfriend to change a link because it might draw thirsty girls to his social media, you guys would say he’s a creep and must not be faithful for even putting that link up in the first place.” ~ Dull_Bumblebee_356
“NTA – you don’t want a partner that makes innuendos to strangers online, that is perfectly reasonable as it may attract the wrong type of attention.”
“To me it sounds as though your morals do not align and I would reconsider the relationship.”
“Also, involving her friends in such a petty disagreement shows immaturity. Remember her friend’s opinions are worthless and they shouldn’t dictate your and your partner’s relationship!” ~ EverytingDead666
“NTA. Bro, she is joking to a bunch of strange men about seeing her p*ssy, how is that not weird as hell when you’re in a committed relationship?” ~ ange_98
“Kick her to the curb. She might not speak English as a first language but she’s not dumb either. She understands what you’re saying.”
“That’s why she thinks it’s so clever. She understands exactly what it means and what you’re suggesting.”
“So why is she fighting you on it and why did she drag her friends into your business… She’s probably already cheating on you or will be shortly.”
“In Indian culture, women are the boss. Don’t forget that.” ~ BananaManApe
“You fool, you’ve come to Reddit to ask this. You forget the cardinal rule here, women can do almost no wrong.”
“NTA. I’d assume since she did that she’s aware of what X implies, and if so, that’s just disappointing.” ~ AIphaBlizzard
“NTA. Basically says ‘wanna see my p*ssy’. I wouldn’t want my gf writing that anywhere online.”
“And yeah Reddit is probably the worst place to get any feedback about women, speak to your mates.” ~ Flewizzle
“NTA, your girlfriend is TA. These people here are insane—your girlfriend is dropping not-so-subtle sexual innuendos to other men on pictures of her.”
“The people here saying you’re ‘controlling’ wouldn’t waste a second accusing you of being a cheater if you would just be texting some other girl or asking your ex for answers for an exam.”
“Sadly on Reddit I see not many girls have even the slightest respect for their boyfriends.” ~ Trowawayagainsacc
“You are normal for not liking it, she knows exactly what she is doing and maybe OnlyFans will be next.” ~ Usual-Cookie3148
“NTA. This is how it starts. She then will begin selling her ‘pics’. Run, dude.” ~ SuccessTimely5730
“Yep, the more she sexualizes herself the more money and attention she’ll get. It’s already the beginning of the end, this isn’t going to last.” ~ Fakercel
“I’ve said this a million times, this sub is very bias against men, like people can’t even see where he’s coming from.” ~ mrb00ce
But those self-proclaimed “good guys” were a small but vocal minority in the replies.
Most felt the OP was overreacting or overbearing.
“YTA. Creeps are going to be creeps, and women shouldn’t be asked to modify their behavior or censor themselves because of it.” ~ WandaDobby777
“YTA, it’s a joke. It’s linking to the site X. I get it. The tone of her other links will make it obvious, so yeah, you’re overreacting and making it weird.” ~ C_beside_the_seaside
“‘I told her to change it…’.”
“That’s where YTA. As if you have that authority and are able to command her to do your bidding.” ~ ArkayLeigh
“YTA. I get where you’re coming from and why it irks you, but you *are* being a control freak.” ~ Subrosianite
“YTA. It’s her income. She gets to decide. And your logic about ‘bringing creeps into her life’ is stupid. Any remotely attractive woman will get creeps online.”
“There’s a cosplayer who only does super PG videos of mostly Disney characters or Marvel. She gets asked daily if she has an OnlyFans or when she’ll do it.”
“If your girlfriend gets more clicks from those weirdos, that’s more money for her.” ~ Addaran
“YTA, it’s a joke. Her being ESL has nothing to do with the fact that this is just…a joke??”
“The joke is that she doesn’t make explicit content. She’s probably already inundated with creeps, this isn’t going to change that either way.” ~ hammocks_
“YTA for being controlling and uptight over a mild joke.”
“Even if it sounds pornographic it’s truly not, it’s a silly pun, and it’s mostly jesting over the change on Twitter rather than being sexual.”
“Let her have fun and take relief she’s not doing anything unsavory. Because from how you’ve portrayed yourself here over a joke, seems like you’d have an actual heart attack if she were doing some kind of sex work.” ~ PrincessAintPeachy
“YTA, but only a little. You can explain to her:
- you don’t like it
- why you don’t like it
- possible harms
- suggest alternatives”
“You CANNOT:
- tell her what to do.
- Full stop.”
“Take this as you will. You control yourself, but not her.”
“This is where you can set up your boundaries, but not hers.” ~ adwasaki
“YTA. Bro, it’s controlling.”
“You also have to understand she’s a woman on the internet. She’s a non-American woman on the Internet who does cosplay. ON THE INTERNET.”
“She already has creeps in her DMs. She already deals with this and probably has way longer than you’ve known her.”
“Also it’s not gonna get her any new weirdos because it’s a linktree. If someone visits her linktree, they’re already invested in looking at her other content, and if they’re already fans of her content, they’ll probably find it’s funny bc it’s on brand.”
“IDK why you’re so invested in thinking you can protect her from other men on the internet, but you can’t. You can be there for her when people are freaks, and you can console her, but it will ALWAYS happen. Always.”
“Just be a supportive partner instead of insisting that you know more than she does.” ~ AngryAeron
The OP didn’t provide an update after receiving their judgment.
It’s unclear whether he went with the majority opinion that opposed his behavior or the exclusively male minority opinion that supported him and denigrated his girlfriend.