One would hope that a person coming out as LGBTQ+ would have the support of every family member, but unfortunately, that is not always the case.
Redditor Acceptable-Sand3229 is a lesbian who has the support of her mom, who gave her and her wife a pride flag.
The Redditor’s brother, on the other hand, is homophobic.
A recent incident proved he will not be coming around to accepting his gay sister any time soon.
After a blowout between the siblings, our Redditor visited the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit and asked:
“AITA for calling the police on my brother.”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“So for Christmas my mother got me and my wife a pride flag, and we hung it on the outside of our garage. It got stolen a few days ago, but since we have cameras we were able to figure out the culprit was my brother.”
“This isn’t a huge surprise, I came out at 12 and in the 32 years later and he has been nothing but horrible to me because of that. I decided even so to call him up and ask him to return the flag, I told him that as long as he doesn’t do it again we can forget about it.”
“He refused and said some homophobic slurs, so I called the police and reported it.”
“He is on probation so he could go back to jail now. He called me and cursed me out saying I’m sending him to jail for stealing a $10 flag. AITA?”
Strangers online were asked to declare one of the following:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
Many Redditors thought the OP was not the a**hole in the situation, and they thought the brother had it coming for his behavior.
“NTA – he has no business coming and stealing a pride flag that was gifted to you by your mother. Not only is that theft, but he’s also spewing homophobic slurs at you.”
“He could have avoided this situation by 1) not stealing your flag in the first place; and 2) by apologizing and returning the flag. He did neither.” – 0ne8two
“NTA play stupid games, win stupid prizes.”
“I’d bet this type of disrespectful and hurtful behavior is what led to jail anyway. Some people might tell you to turn the other cheek, etc., and that’s always an option of course but consequences are, too. And that’s what this is—a consequence.” – Active_Win_3656
“NTA, he played a stupid game and won a stupid prize lmao.”
“Only thing is maybe watch ur back with other family members calling you petty, it might cause a bit of a stir if theyre also homophobic.” – afraidbuttrying
“👏👏👏at this point, isn’t it crossing over towards hate crime territory???”
“Bottom line: if he wasn’t on probation, stealing your ‘$10 flag’ wouldn’t have been anything more than a slap on the wrist. But obviously he’s not a fan of much, including but not limited to, following the law.”
“OP gave him a chance to do the right thing, he decided he’s rather continue being ignorant and risk going to jail 🤷🏻♀️” – Hugh_Jaynus_83
“NTA. You offered him a way to not get in trouble. You offered to just have him return it. He spouted bigoted nonsense at you. He knew he was on parole, but his hatred was way more important than his freedom. He f’ked around, he found out.” – Badger-of-Horrors
“NTA- he committed a theft which is not on you. Calling the police is what you should of done. Unfortunately he’s your brother and I can tell you’re feeling guilty, and it’s ok to feel guilty, it shows even throughout the past 32 years you still care for him.”
“You’re a good person to feel that guilt, but it’s not your fault, he’s needs to grow up.” – Suspicious_Dig4728
“NTA, it doesn’t matter if it’s just a flag. he chose to do a crime on probation. 🤷 he deserves what he gets for it. he had a chance to give it back and he has had chances in the last 32 years to stop being a homophobe.”
“he clearly doesn’t see himself as family of yours (and even if he was a good family member that doesn’t make what he did okay).” – Juliennix
“NTA. okay stupid games, win stupid prizes.”
“if he didn’t want to face jail time, then maybe he shouldn’t have… i dunno… committed a crime? it doesn’t matter that he’s family. it matters that he was disrespectful, stole your property, and then continued to further dig his own grave by using slurs.”
“you’re much more graceful than i would have been in this situation. blessed be to you and your partner, OP.” – Mundane_Ambassador87
“Brother is 100% petty and homophobic. OP has every right to call the police for the theft whether it is $10 or $1,000. He had no right to step foot on the property and steal the flag.”
“OP offered him to return it and ignore his theft, and he rejected. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. OP is NTA.” – Tiny_Buy20
“NTA. You gave him a chance to return it, a chance he frankly didn’t deserve in the first place. You’ve already gone above and beyond.”
“If he goes to jail ‘over a $10 flag’ it isn’t because you sent him there. It is because he made a bad decision twice over (the choice to steal it and again when he refused to return it).”
“Clearly he has an issue taking ownership of his own mistakes.”
“But protect yourself. Keep copies of the police report. Be ready to file a restraining order if necessary if he doesn’t go to jail. Stealing the flag is only one step in a pattern.”
“Clearly he’s already been verbally harassing you prior to this. This was an escalation. Go no contact. Again mentally and physically prepare yourself for a restraining order. Clearly you already have cameras. I assume you have a security system as well I hope?”
“Protect yourselves. Stay safe.” – artemis1860
Overall, Redditors continued denouncing the brother for committing a hate crime, not just over stealing a “$10 flag.”
Redditors also hoped the brother will learn a lesson that his anti-LGBTQ behavior will never be condoned.