in , ,

Parents Install GPS Tracker After Daughter Keeps Driving Car They Bought Her Without A License

Cavan Images/Getty Images

Driving is dangerous.

It can be like Mad Max: Thunderdome out there.

People don’t pay attention or they just don’t care.

So we want to hope everyone is being as safe as possible.

Case in point…

Redditor Dry_Tumbleweed_862 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback. So naturally, she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

She asked:

“AITA for installing a GPS tracker in my 15 year old daughter’s car?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“I have a daughter who is 15 years old and recently got her instruction/learner’s permit after she took a summer driver’s ed course and passed the written exam.”

“In my state, the learner’s permit has a driving restriction in that the child must have a licensed adult (21 or older) in the front passenger seat with them at all times, no exceptions.”

“She has to hold this learner’s permit for at least 1 year before she can move up to a restricted license at 16 years old.”

“We bought her a car during the summer so that she can have a familiar car to practice in with us while having her learner’s permit.”

“This will be the same car she will use once she gets her license.”

“The problem is that she has been driving this car by herself without our permission or even informing us.”

“Sometimes we leave our daughter home alone for a few hours so that we can go to the store or on a date, etc.”

“And she has been secretly driving when we are not home (she has her own key and we have the spare).”

“I found out after noticing the discrepancy in the miles on her car.”

“We scolded her and told her that it was illegal for her to drive on her own, and we started outlining the tires with chalk so that we know if she uses the car or not.”

“However, the chalk does not actually stop her from taking the car out.”

“It only lets us know afterward if she did.”

“So she still kept using the car and would shrug us off afterward.”

“I don’t want her breaking the law and I’m terrified of her driving on her own with so little experience (although she seems to be doing fine as the car has no damage) so I secretly installed a GPS tracking device in the car.”

“We then secretly pretended to leave and waited until we noticed that the car’s location changed.”

“I immediately called my daughter and yelled at her telling her that she needed to come home now.”

“She came back and we got into a huge screaming fight that ended up in tears.”

“She screamed that I was a controlling mother and was invading her privacy and that this was her car since we bought it for her, so we had no right to secretly install the tracker without her permission.”

“I talked to someone else about it and they did say I took the wrong approach and that it was wrong of me to install the tracker and that I should’ve done something else.”

“I would’ve taken the key back but she refuses to give it to me, and I don’t know where she keeps it.”

“AITA for secretly installing a GPS tracker in my daughter’s car?”

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared OP WAS the A**hole.

“Take the keys from her… it’s really that simple.”  ~ Optimal-Survey2989

“Best answer right here. Sell the car.”

“She might be able to pass the test but she is not mature or trustworthy enough to follow your extremely reasonable rules or obey the law.”

“WTF is a tracker going to do?”

“You know she can’t be trusted, you take away the two-ton, high-velocity metal toy.”

“YTA for not already having done that.”

“I’m sorry for everyone who lives near you.”

“Parent your child.”  ~ Hoistedonyrownpetard

“Yes, explain calmly to her that breaking the law at this point is not boding well for her behavior in the future.”

“So it’s either following the rules or not continuing on to having a license.”

“If this talk does not work, she shouldn’t get a license.”

“If she in the future will start driving without a license it’s even worse.”

“Perhaps you should report her to the police or take her to the nearest station for a talk about breaking a law.”  ~ False_Antelope8729

“Her entitlement is what makes me mad. It’s not her car.”

“It was bought for her use.”

“Unless she paid for it, the insurance, maintenance, and gas… IT DOES NOT BELONG TO HER!!”

“Same as her room.”

“She is so disrespectful not to even give you the key.”

“Who is in charge here? For your information.”

“Keep the tracker in the car.”

“She lies too much to not be trusted.”

“And it’s your liability if she gets in a wreck to the point you could lose your home if someone sues you for more than insurance covers.”

“Her age doesn’t determine when she can drive, YOU DO!”

“Be a parent and tell her no not this year.”  ~ Fluid_Association292

“Imagine the police calling you because she got pulled over, was in jail, or in the hospital, or dead…”

“Would you tell them, ‘I tried to chalk the car as a way to motivate her not to take the car because she’d know we found out…'”

“Or ‘I installed a GPS because she kept taking the car without our permission so I’d know she was still taking the car…'”

“Or ‘I asked her for the keys so that she couldn’t drive it anymore, but she wouldn’t give them to me.'”

“I don’t know wtf is happening in that household, but get your crap together and PARENT.”

“YOU are just as liable as her with her being a minor and you being the guardian.”

“She is YOUR responsibility, therefore what she does affects you, in all ways, including legally.”

“When you go to court over why she was driving, you have no reasonable defense.”

“You will be sued. You will lose. Maybe your cars.”

“Maybe your house. Maybe your child. Come on.”  ~ Please_Do_Share

“YTA. Take the freaking keys already.”

“Good grief, tracking her does nothing to prevent her from getting into an accident.”

“You bought her a car, but I’m guessing it’s in your name and you’re the one paying on the insurance.”

“Be a parent, not a sneak.”

“Take the keys to your office or someplace outside your home and lock them up.”

“A no-car diet should start immediately for her.” ~ pdxflwerpwer

OP came back with some details…

“I do plan to remove this tracker once she gets her license.”

“It is only while she has her learner’s permit.”

“We drove the car to a local Walmart because I saw they’re pretty friendly with truckers and van dwellers so I figured that they wouldn’t mind a car left overnight.”

“We don’t have anyone who lives nearby that we can keep the car at.”

“I called an auto locksmith and they said that the earliest they can come out is tomorrow afternoon so we’re waiting on that.”

“There’s a lot of people who asked the same questions and I can’t respond to everyone so I’m just going to answer them here.”

“Why did you buy her a car in the first place?”

“I wanted her to be able to practice driving for her license in a car that would be familiar even after she got her license.”

“That way she would feel more confident since she knows the car, where everything is, etc.”

“Driving is scary so I wanted it to be a really smooth transition from her learner’s to her license.”

“This is also why we didn’t think to sell the car either since we wanted to keep it for this reason.”

“I told my husband about selling the car and he said he would think about it (He was the one who paid for it).”

“Why did you give her a key in the first place?”

“My parents bought me a car when I was 14 and had my learner’s permit also.”

‘They immediately gave me a key to it and I never once drove the car without their permission despite always having the key.”

“I thought my daughter would do the same thing.”

“I’ve raised her almost exactly how my parents raised me, so I thought she’d act the same way as I did in the same situation.”

“Why haven’t you taken the key?”

“I have told her to give it back to me but she refuses and even when I searched her room, I was unable to find it.”

“Why haven’t you done anything to punish her?”

“I already told her she was grounded long ago and she does not get to use a smartphone.”

“She still has a flip phone.”

“I don’t want to completely take away a phone because I still want her to be able to contact me in case of emergency.”

“But she has unrestricted access to her laptop because her homework is posted and submitted online.”

“Why haven’t you disabled the car?”

“To be honest, both me and my husband don’t know much about cars so this didn’t even occur to us to try.”

“I’d never even heard of a steering wheel club before.”

“We’re the type of people who bring our car into the shop for any maintenance, so I didn’t know how to disable the car.”

“So the idea of removing parts of the car or such never occurred to us.”

“Why did you think the chalk/tracker would work?”

“Honestly, just because it would’ve worked on me when I was a teen.”

“I didn’t like upsetting my parents so I never did things like this before and small minor punishments really quickly put me in my place growing up whenever I did misbehave.”

“I thought the tracker was more serious than the chalk because it meant that I would find out she took the car almost immediately before she got too far.”

Well OP, Reddit was pretty vocal and pretty clear.

It sounds like you listened and are taking action.

Good luck and stay safe.