At parties, once the booze has been flowing for awhile, it’s common that everything can get a little crazy.
Conversations amongst guests can become especially… eclectic.
And conversations with drunk people isn’t everybody’s cup of tea.
Case in point…
Redditor DrunkPhilosoph wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
They asked:
“AITA for making this woman uncomfortable while drunk and refusing to apologize?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My friends and I had a small get together Friday night where we all got sloshed and played cards.”
“One brought a new coworker with her.”
“To be clear, everyone brought alcohol, and there was a lot of drinking.”
“Most people were as tipsy as me. Some more so.”
“When I have a few, I talk a lot.”
“I don’t really talk to anyone, I just talk.”
“It’s usually random theoretical questions about philosophy or something.”
“Really cliche stuff.”
“Like, if you go and find all the parts of the ship of Theseus and put them back together, would it be the same ship then?”
“Y’know, just overthinking stuff to the extent I’ve missed the original point.”
“My friends will sometimes engage with me, because when they’re drunk, they find it funny.”
“When they get bored they just start ignoring me.”
“Last night I was mostly talking about time travel.”
“I mentioned the bootstrap paradox and started rambling nonsensically about ideas randomly coming into existence and then time travelers going back and putting them in the time stream.”
“It didn’t make sense. I was drunk.”
“My friend that brought her coworker texted me this morning and asked me if I talked to her coworker at all that night.”
“A little, but not really.”
“Just the hi, nice to meet you, stuff.”
“She said the coworker said I made her really uncomfortable and she didn’t want to go to any future gatherings with me there.”
“I asked what I did, exactly, that made her uncomfortable.”
“My friend texted me back that she said I went on all night about crazy conspiracy theories, and it scared her.”
“I told my friend that I was just talking theoretically, like I always do.”
“Also, what’s scary about time travel?”
“I don’t get that.”
“She said her coworker thinks I’m mentally unbalanced.”
“She said she’d give her coworker her phone so I can call and apologize if I want to clear the air.”
“I declined. I didn’t do anything to her.”
“If she doesn’t want to go to future gatherings, that’s probably for the best.”
“My friend said I’m being an a**hole.”
“She wants to be friends with her new coworker, and I’m making it hard.”
“I understand that, but I’m not going to apologize for being a rambling drunk.”
“If she feels uncomfortable around drunk people, I understand, and she shouldn’t go to parties centered around drinking in the future.”
“Am I off base?”
“AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA. This kind of sounds like what a lot of people do when they’re drunk or high.”
“Like, was the coworker super young or sheltered or something?”
“I don’t understand.” ~ Aggravating_Start411
“Why on earth does your friend think this woman would want you to call her if you made her so uncomfortable in the first place?”
“If I went to a party with a friend, and my friend’s friend made me uncomfortable, the LAST thing I want is a phone call from that person.”
“Just a weird ask under the circumstances.” ~ oliviamrow
“OP’s friend is being ridiculous even if they weren’t planning on handing over any phone numbers.”
“‘Hey (friend A)! Remember how (friend B) made you uncomfortable with all their conspiracy theory talk at that party?'”
“‘Well I’ve got them on the phone right now so they can prove to you how totally normal they are! Hang on, handing my phone to them!'”
“I would be so mad at my friend for telling OP what I said and then putting me on the spot with them on top of having to interact with someone who’d made me uncomfortable in the first place.” ~ oliviamrow
“Honestly, I don’t even care about how the coworker/new friend feels.”
“It’s weird as hell to ask your friend to call someone and apologize to them for them not liking you.”
“Really shows where that ‘friend’ puts OP in her life if she’s demanding he apologize for being himself (in a non-racist/sexist/bigoted/otherwise offensive way) to preserve her friendship with someone else.”
“OP is a weird dude in a mon-harmful way.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“All his other friends accept that, and this friend at least pretended to accept that.”
“If the friend’s coworker can’t accept that, she doesn’t have to come to their social gatherings.”
“Trying to force OP to change his non-harmful behaviors in order to make some stranger feel comfortable is an AH move on the friend’s part.” ~ Noodlefanboi
“OP, assuming your alcohol buzz hasn’t made you forget some highly offensive ramblings, NTA.”
“But your friend is an AH.”
‘She called you with this second-hand vague story, didn’t ask for your confirmation, didn’t give you the benefit of the doubt, and now wants you to apologize to a woman who somehow managed to make your dialogue all about her.”
“And, even if you did act like too much of a weirdo, your friend shouldn’t be demanding that you apologize.”
“People apologize for hurting someone, not for being ‘too far out there.'”
“I think it’s your friend that owes you an apology.” ~ iheartwords
“The friend sounds like she’s ready to trade OP out for this girl.”
“Suddenly OP should apologize for existing while drunk and be considerate of this girl who thinks she can dictate the friendships within this group.”
“That just tells me that this girl is trouble and the mutual friend is too much of a fool to spot the patterns.”
“This is how narcs behave, come in and start making demands and splitting up friend groups or families.” ~ Academic_Snow_7680
“NTA. You’re an obnoxious drunk, and this girl doesn’t like being around obnoxious drunks.”
“Neither of you is TA for that.”
“Your friend is TA for not minding his own business and demanding an apology from you despite your not having done anything that merits one.”
“Some people don’t like being around drunks, and those people shouldn’t go drinking.”
“I don’t know why your friend has to complicate the situation any more than that.” ~ SomeoneYouDontKnow70
“This here is the best answer.”
“I’ve been around a fair share of obnoxious drunks that other friends have brought around, and I don’t expect them to apologize for being obnoxious unless they somehow were disrespectful or intentionally offensive.”
“I just tell my friends that I won’t go to small gatherings where the obnoxious drunks are present.”
“No reason to hamper their fun, and i don’t have to spend the night annoyed.” ~ Chinchilladon
“I completely agree.”
“When I was really young, I found obnoxious drunks to be amusing, and I even enjoyed being one myself.”
“As time went on it got old, and I eventually came to find it repulsive.”
“That’s why I don’t go to clubs anymore and why I found a wife who doesn’t even drink.”
“To each their own.” ~ SomeoneYouDontKnow70
“NAH – this girl is allowed not to like you, and you can continue to be a boring and inconsiderate drunk and deal with the social consequences of that.” ~ OrangeCubit
“There is a difference between ‘this girl is allowed to not like you’ and this girl directly calling you ‘mentally unbalanced’ and demanding an apology though.”
“If this situation has stopped at the girl not liking OP, I think NAH is correct.”
“But she escalated to insults for perceived slights at conversations not directed nor involving her, and wants an apology.”
“That moves it to NTA in my opinion, the girl is being an AH.” ~ Destroyer2118
“Considering some of the conversations/ comments I’ve had from intoxicated people, OP sounds rather fun!”
“I’d much rather have a ramble about time travel than some drunken a**hole telling me how nice my breasts are.”
“I mean, they are but it’s not like I’m about to pop them out on the table just because you told me so!”
“OP doesn’t sound obnoxious, he sounds like he was chatting away in his own little world.”
“Also no mention of rest of the group telling him to stop so he clearly wasn’t bothering anyone else.”
“He wasn’t rude, he wasn’t sexually inappropriate and he didn’t infringe on her personal space or ask intrusive questions. NTA.” ~ Lulubelle__007
“NTA. Most people, myself included, when under an influence ramble about any and everything. This new person sounds sheltered.”
“I mean conspiracy theories really? And it all scared her?” ~ RecklessCreature
“NAH. You sound incredibly obnoxious to be around and I’d avoid you too but you didn’t do anything morally wrong.”
“Though I think you should accept that the problem isn’t drunk people it’s drunk you who, I repeat, sounds irritating as hell.” ~ majere616
OP had an update…
“Apparently she didn’t realize I was being theoretical and thinks I actually believe all of human history has been rewritten by time travel.”
“And she thinks I talk like that all the time, not just when drunk, because she and my friend arrived halfway through the party when the drinking was already well underway, so she’s never met ‘sober me.'”
Well OP, Reddit is with you.
Trying to remember drunken conversation is too difficult to feel guilty over.
Hopefully your friend will explain it all more thoroughly and appease her co-worker for the future.