Ideally, a pawn shop simplifies the shopping experience.
All the items are used, so they're cheaper.
On top of that, the supply is limited to what people have sold recently, so the struggles of infinite choice are eliminated as well.
But for one woman, the pawn shop experience suddenly grew very complicated and unfolded into a real headache.
She explained the ordeal in a post on the "Am I the A**hole (AITA)" subReddit. The Original Poster (OP), known as LookingLiving on the site, outlined the key details in the post's title.
"AITA for refusing to return a computer I bought after the store called and told me that I paid the wrong price for it?"
OP described the situation's casual beginnings.
"Last week, I went to a local pawn shop to sell some stuff. While I was there, I was window shopping and saw that they had a computer for $89."
"I only really use a computer for youtube or websites and my laptop is pretty old so I tested this computer, everything worked so I bought it."
But there was an unexpected development.
"The next day, I got a call and it was from the manager of the shop."
"He was very rude from the start and told me that the computer was labeled incorrectly and told me (didn't ask, rudely ordered me) to come in that day and either A.) return the computer or B.) pay the difference."
"I asked that the difference was and he said over $800. I guess it was supposed to be labeled $899."
OP found herself on the defense.
"I said I'd think about it and he said that if I wasn't in by the end of the day, he'd just charge my card the amount."
"I told him that he can't do that and he said if I didn't bring it in, or pay the difference, he was gonna ban me from the store and also call the police for theft."
"I just said I'd think about it again."
Then things escalated.
"I think he was mad cause the last thing he said to me was 'listen, b***ch, either bring it in or go to jail, your choice.'"
"Or 'you decide.' Something like that. Then ended the call."
OP then assessed the truth of the owner's claims.
"I don't think the police can even do anything cause the price sticker is still on the computer and I have a receipt of the transaction for the $89 and there's probably also camera footage of me buying it and he must have a record of the purchase too."
"It's not my fault that him or an employee labeled it incorrectly and it's not like I knew it was a wrong price when I bought it."
"I just saw a cheap computer that worked and bought it."
But when OP sought some friendly advice, the next steps remained unclear.
"I asked my friend who's into computers to look at it and see if it's actually worth that much or if this guy's just trying to scam me or something and he said that the parts are pretty high end and expensive."
"I don't think I did anything wrong but my friend said that I should take it back so idk."
Anonymous strangers on the internet were asked to provide feedback by declaring:
- NTA - Not The A**hole
- YTA - You're The A**hole
- ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH - No A**holes Here
By and large, Redditors took OP's side.
They shared their rationale.
"NTA. You paid the price that was stated for the computer. Any screw up is their responsibility to handle on their own." -- FourLeafClover0
"NTA, you paid the price it said it was and they finalised the transaction."
"They can't just claim it costs 1000% more the next day - everyone would try to sell their stuff that way...'oh it's $1 (until tomorrow, if you decide you like it and don't want to return it, you'll have to pay another $100' - nope!" -- yeIIowish
"NTA. He asked for a price; you paid it. End of story. Especially because of the rude behaviour, you owe him nothing."
"Do keep the sticker and the receipt. :-)" -- aQ1tmxMP
"NTA. It's a pawn shop you almost never pay the actual amount for an item. I've seen $1000 jewelry pawned and receiving $40. Don't return."
"Imagine that the original owner sold it to them and probably got a $100 for it then wanted to sell it to you for $899. Scams all around." -- North_Tell_4144
Some added pragmatic advice to their feedback.
"NTA and I hope that they do call the police, because they will be told that they're wrong. The transaction is over."
"Call your credit card company asap and tell them not to allow any charges from that vendor." -- ISeeMusicInColor
"NTA. Absolutely do not take it back. If he had been polite and apologetic there might be an argument for giving the guy a break, but he was an absolute *%#+ to you."
"Keep the price sticker and the receipt somewhere safe, and call your credit card company to ensure he can't make further unauthorised charges to your card." -- justliketheotherone
"NTA. Their mistake not your problem. Don't remove the sale sticker and tape the receipt to the computer so they don't get lost."
"Send a friend in to see if there's a 'all sales final' sign and snap a pic. You might want to give your credit card company the heads up on this guy." -- Bansidehe13
Others advised going even one step further.
"NTA, personally I'd be calling the police to report that you were threatened by this person and now you don't feel safe." -- Herdnerfer
"NTA That's their fault not yours."
"Call the police yourself and let them know what happened but the shop owner literally can't do anything. You didn't alter the price or anything, their mistake, their loss." -- kalkiki
"NTA. It's unfortunate they made a mistake, but that isn't your fault. If he does charge your card, you're the one who needs to call the police."
"It isn't legal for you to be quoted one price and charged another; it's even less legal for them to charge your card without your permission. I'm sure the guy is upset but this behavior is not normal." -- minervasbiscuittin
OP followed up after reading all the feedback and let people know what she planned to do next.
"Thank you all for the advice. I don't think I'm going to return it and I am going to contact my bank about it, I wasn't aware that they could prevent a transaction, I thought you're just supposed to call after someone charges your card."
We hope OP doesn't run into troublesome situations like this one in the future, but if she does, at least she'll be able to post to Reddit on her new computer.
Woman Breaks Up With Boyfriend Who Worried People Would Think She Was Trans For Using Stand-To-Pee Device
Content Warning: Transphobia, Transphobic Comments
There are countless different reasons that a relationship might end, and a red flag could arise at any time. Some of these might have been learned in childhood and could improve over time.
Transphobia is absolutely a red flag that should be acted on immediately; however, with no option to fly again, pointed out the members of the "Am I the A**hole?" (AITA) subReddit.
Redditor funnelfuss was in the car with her boyfriend when they got stuck in a traffic jam.
She really needed to use the restroom, so since she had a device with her to make the process easier, she decided she'd step out of the car.
But when her boyfriend panicked and thought people might mistake her for a man, the Original Poster (OP) realized that her boyfriend was not who she thought he was.
She asked the sub:
The OP had to use the restroom while stuck in a traffic jam.
"My (26 Female) boyfriend (25 Male) and I got stuck in an insane traffic jam. My boyfriend was driving."
"We were at a standstill. Found out later on, they had closed the highway."
"I had to pee really bad, like bad bad bad. I saw that a couple guys had run to the side of the road to pee, and I decided to do the same."
"It was super open, with a few bushes by the side of the road, really not much cover."
The OP's boyfriend became uncomfortable when he realized she had a pee-to-stand device.
"I have a stand-to-pee device in my car, but when I grabbed it, my boyfriend got all weird."
"He said people would see me pee standing up and think I was Trans."
"I said no one would think that, plenty of women have pee funnels, and that also I didn't care. I have no beef with Trans people!"
"He said I should squat, just to put his mind at ease."
"I said I didn't want to get my butt and c**ch out on the highway in front of everyone, or get pee on my shoes, and I just wanted to be quick and clean."
"He said he didn't want people to look at the girl he was dating and think she was Trans and that I should squat, like GIRLS do."
The OP decided she was over it.
"I was dying by this point. I couldn't hold it anymore, and I really didn't want to show the world my butt, so I ran to the side of the road and slipped the device into my jeans and just peed standing up with my back to traffic."
"No one could see anything; it just slides through the zipper. But I guess maybe if someone was looking, they would be confused? But also, who's LOOKING?!"
"When I got back to the car, my boyfriend wouldn't talk to me. He says I disrespected his feelings. But it was 100% an emergency, and I don't get what his problem was."
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
Some reassured the OP that there was nothing wrong with using the restroom how she wanted.
"OP, don't think for one more second about this. Your boyfriend is being ridiculous."
"As if you will ever see any of those people again! Plus, holding it in for too long can cause a whole host of issues."
"It's actually genius that you have something like that in your car, just in case. I'm going to order one too now! NTA." - m_alice88
"'Honey, please show all these strangers your c**ch and a** so they know I'm not gay, mmmm'kay?'"
"A weak man, a very weak man." - lefteyedcrow
"You must have a she-wee! Those are so great for women."
"Tell your boyfriend to get over himself. You had to pee. He does not understand that squatting can suck and leave you exposed."
"If he is that upset you did this, rethink this relationship. I would find it hysterical."
"NTA." - Oktodayithink
"NTA, OP. You just needed a makeshift restroom."
"Your boyfriend apparently thought that it was normal for people to stare at strangers who are trying to pee to evaluate who they are, who they're with, and what the status of their relationship is."
"You know, to pass the time while in gridlock traffic." - Pixichixi
"You did nothing wrong, OP! When you have to go, you have to go. It's healthier to go."
"And don't apologize! We're so wired to reduce conflict, even to the point of downplaying how we feel to keep the peace or end the silence. Don't do it."
"It's a him issue. He thinks his feelings on this are more important than your discomfort about showing your naked body on the side of the road. If he can't figure that out for himself and apologize, it would be a dealbreaker for me." - lelawes
Others agreed and pointed out that the ex-boyfriend was very transphobic.
"NTA. Your boyfriend is clearly transphobic. That is 100% on him. And who cares if people think you are Trans?"
"'He said he didn't want people to look at the girl he was dating and think she was Trans.' And you don't want people to think you're dating someone bigoted and hateful." - GreekAmericanDom
"He may not consider himself transphobic ('I don't hate Trans people! I just don't want to be associated with them or have anyone think I'm with a Trans person!'), but he absolutely is, probably with a healthy side helping of homophobia."
"Why would he care, unless a) Trans women are not women in his eyes, or b) it somehow would be emasculating or embarrassing to his ego to be with a Trans woman."
"Also, you're in a traffic jam. Who the f**k is even watching close enough to care, and who of those people matters enough to give two s**ts about what they think."
"Not to mention, he's being weirdly controlling about your behaviors and how they reflect on him in a scenario where arguably he's never going to interact with a single person he's worrying about." - maladicta228
"This post reminds me of the time I got dressed to go to a function. It was a casual gathering. My kid (this was solidly on their father, my ex, as he's gotten insanely bigoted as he's aged) said, 'Mom, you're dressed like a Lesbian.'"
"Me: 'Lesbians have great fashion sense, I'd love to be mistaken for one.'"
"They paused for a second and realized that I truly wasn't dressing for men (despite it being my husband's work function), and that being seen as a lesbian was a good thing. I'm so glad I raised them to think for themselves, and realize that one can be wrong, admit it, and work on being a better person every day. They've never said anything like that since." - baconbitsy
"He's so insecure (and transphobic) that he cares more about what some strangers in a traffic jam might wrongly assume about you (and thereby him) than YOUR needs, comfort, and health."
"He expected you to prioritize his insecurities (feelings) above that and then punished you when you prioritized your health."
"You sure you want to be with someone like that?? NTA." - molotovmerkin
"Your boyfriend is so transphobic that he wants you to expose your genitalia on the side of the road to prove that you're not a Trans woman because he can't stand the idea of a total stranger, in a neighboring car, whom he will never speak to or see ever again, thinking he MIGHT be SHARING A CAR (because the strangers in other cars have no idea that you're dating) with a Trans woman."
"You're NTA, but get a better boyfriend." - HighCsummer
"Literally, you have to be super transphobic to think people in traffic are gonna judge you if your girlfriend is standing to pee. Like come onnnnnn, this is some insane insecurity." - Responsible-Pickle-2
Some pointed out that not only was the ex-boyfriend transphobic, but also controlling.
"This won't be the last time he expects OP to sacrifice things or make her life worse so that she can conform to his ideal of feminine stereotypes and keep up appearances for his fragile masculine ego."
"And that he gave her the silent treatment for not obliging his transphobia and misogyny disguised as 'feelings' is also problematic." - blancamystiere
"He's insecure and transphobic. He also puts his insecurity and transphobia above your comfort."
"NTA, and honestly, you can do better than this specimen." - PetersMapProject
"NTA. Your boyfriend would have preferred for everyone to see your a** and vagina than have a random stranger think his girlfriend is Trans. He would rather you expose yourself for his personal gain."
"Get a better boyfriend." - Amaze-balls-trippen
"The transphobia? The insecurity? And the silent treatment when he doesn't get his way?"
"So many red flags!" - CarolynDesign
"He also puts his insecurity and transphobia above your comfort and safety."
"He would rather you invite unwanted attention and risk by exposing your private parts to the world than have people think he (who most of the onlookers couldn't even see) might be dating a Trans person."
"NTA. OP, he's too insecure, self-centered, and immature to be a good partner to you, given that he's willing to compromise your safety to avoid a single twinge of discomfort. Dump him." - Hari_om_tat_sat
After receiving feedback, the OP was reassured and shared some positive updates.
"UPDATE: Thank you, everyone, for helping me feel sane again!"
"I got quite a few questions about which device I use, and honestly, it's about what fits you best. There are a ton of options. It's what fits you. Check out pStyle, Freshette, and EllaPee."
"I tried peeing standing up in a toilet, and it worked fine. I think my aim was pretty good, but then I saw little droplets on the floor. No thanks, don't need that. Also, it's loud? Awkward."
"But for the outside, it's pretty fun! I drive a lot, that's why it was in my car. Lifesaver."
"Also, I guess in this case it brought out an ugly side of my (ex) boyfriend and clarified some stuff for me. A winner all around."
"And to all the commenters asking, YES, he is an ex-boyfriend now."
"And yes, there were other red flags."
"Ditched the man, kept the pee funnel. Gonna laugh at him every time I pee standing up."
There's no way to imagine just how awkward the rest of the car ride was after using the restroom and returning to the now-silent and very entitled boyfriend, still stuck in a traffic jam.
But fortunately for the OP, she learned something vital about her relationship during a moment that should have been a total non-issue.
By being concerned about this and expecting the OP to prioritize her ex's pride over her comfort, safety, and cleanliness, her ex told her everything she needed to know.