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Redditor Posts Receipts Of Kids’ Bad Behavior After Being Shamed For Having Child-Free Wedding

A little boy sits on the floor of a wedding eating food
Sol Stock/Getty Images

Invites to a wedding are always a touchy subject.

Not every couple can afford to invite everybody.

So often times the first people cut from the invite list are children.

That should be self-explanatory. Right?

Case in point…

Redditor AdCharacter3921 to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

They asked:

“AITA for posting the reasons that I excluded some people from my child-free wedding?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“My sister got married last summer.”

“She had a very elegant and beautiful wedding and reception planned.”

“It was child-free.”

“She sent gracious notes to everyone who sent their regrets and thanked them for understanding her desires for her wedding and respecting them enough to RSVP in the negative.”

“She also invited them to a party later that summer at her home if they wanted to take pictures with her and her wedding party in their fancy clothes.”

“I thought it was well handled and classy.”

“Several people did not understand the meaning of ‘child-free’ and brought their kids anyways.”

“One screamed through the ceremony, and the mom would not leave the chapel because she did not want to cause a fuss.”

“There were problems because no extra place settings were set for them at the reception.”

“So their parents had to share their food with them.”

“The worst was the kid that wanted a cupcake off the table the wedding cake was on.”

“He tipped the wedding cake onto the floor.”

“My dad saved it, but there was a handprint on the lowest tier, and a lot of cupcakes hit the floor.”

“All in all it was four families that brought uninvited children.”

“My wedding invitations just went out over Christmas.”

“We are getting married in May.”

“I know this is a long time, but we have a lot of out-of-town, country, and even continent guests we hope will come.”

“We did not invite these families to our wedding.”

“We have a Facebook group for the wedding for people to share pictures and memories that we might put in the wedding video.”

“They found out about the group and posted to my personal page about being excluded and asking why we are not inviting them.”

“I messaged them privately and asked them to take down their posts and explained that my wedding was smaller and I wasn’t having as many guests as my sister.”

“They went public again and b*tched about me excluding them for no good reason.”

“So I posted the receipts.”

“I posted a video my cousin sent me of the kid crying during the ceremony and the parents doing nothing.”

“The video of the kid freaking out because he had to share trout for supper.”

“The before and after pictures of the wedding cake table.”

“And I also asked if they knew in advance that they were not supposed to bring their kids to the wedding.”

“Then everyone started piling on. To them.”

“I guess there was a lot of stuff I missed.”

“Including one of them changing a kid on the table with the guest book because the closest bathroom did not have a baby station.”

“Now they are all calling me an a**hole for embarrassing them for having children and wanting to be part of family events.”

“I said that they could not understand why rules were in place and that is why they were not invited.”

“My uncle posted about how embarrassed he was that his daughter was one of these entitled jerks and offered to pay my sister for the cake that got wrecked.”

“He had been unable to attend and hadn’t heard about the cake.”

“So AITA?”

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.

“NTA. They tried to call you out publicly for making a decision about YOUR wedding, and you just met them where they were.”

“They sound horrible, no wonder you don’t want them at your wedding.”  ~ Little-Martha31204

“Stick to your guns, OP.”

“it’s your wedding, and you absolutely have the right for it to be child-free and not invite those who disrespected that request last time, especially as they were destructive.”

“If you want to find a way to accommodate those families while sort of having their kids there, maybe look into daycares local to the wedding venue?”

“That way being far away from the kids, babysitters etc… aren’t an issue and neither are the kids ruining the wedding.” ~ Ambitious-Remote-917

“Don’t bother hiring a sitter.”

“I did that for my wedding, and as soon as the doors to the chapel were opened for me to walk down the aisle, the first thing I saw was a couple standing in the back pew holding their very young child.”

“Rude and entitled people think the rules don’t apply to them.”  ~ geniologygal

“Your sister tried to invite them to her child-free wedding.”

“They brought their kids.”

“You tried to not invite them as graciously as possible without any mention of their past bad behavior.”

“They publicly complained.”

“You messaged them privately and gave them a very kind response about your wedding being small, and asked them politely to take down their public complaints.”

“They publicly complained louder and demanded answers.”

“You gave them answers.”

“They brought this on themselves at every tiny step of the way, and you and your sister both showed way more grace than they deserved. NTA.”  ~ SummitJunkie7

“Please understand that you’re NTA.”

“They have every right to refuse to go anywhere without their kids.”

“Other people have every right to tell them that their kids aren’t allowed.”

“They could have said no.”

“They could have policed their kids’ behavior.”

“They could have striven to ensure they were not disruptive.”

“They made their choices, and now they live with the consequences.”

“Look, my cousin invited all of the family to her wedding.”

“My youngest was 3 at the time and started to get a bit bored during the traditional Catholic ceremony… In February… In New York…”

“But I took her outside to get the wiggles and complaints out.”

“Did I miss some of my cousin’s wedding ceremony?”

“Yes, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to let my just-turned-threenager ruin a beautiful ceremony.”

“It’s what you do when you respect the people around you.”

“Your family has blinders on that makes them think they’re entitled.”

“There entitled to bring their kids in the face of a request not to, that they’re entitled to not parent, etc.”

“Don’t ever. EVER. feel bad about setting boundaries with people like that.”

“You’re allowed to love them and not allow their bad choices to impact you negatively.”  ~ GeekMomtoTwo

“NTA. They tried to publicly shame you for not inviting them, when they could’ve just messaged you privately and avoided the embarrassment.”

“They don’t get to try to publicly embarrass someone only to then get upset when it gets turned right back around on them – play stupid games, win stupid prizes.”

“That they’re – in the midst of all of this – STILL trying to justify why they brought their kids despite explicitly being asked not to only underlines even more that you did the right thing.”

“Though a bit of advice – you may want to consider having some ‘bouncers’ at the door to your ceremony and reception should they try to crash.”

“Judging from… well, from all of THIS… it seems like that’s at least a possibility.”  ~ hannahsflora

“NTA. My husband and I wanted a childfree wedding, but got guilt-tripped into allowing kids.”

“There were cute moments, but overall I wish there’d been no kids.”

“They screamed during the ceremony (I had to stop my own wedding due to a toddler screaming “No no no!” while her dad ignored her).”

“They broke the glass table decorations.”

“They smeared chocolate on my husband’s vest.”

“They ran around underfoot.”

“I’m convinced the only reason I didn’t lose it was my bridal party made a deal to keep the kids away from me.”  ~ flyin_high_flyin_bi

“NTA. I am so tired of people inflicting their ill-behaved (not all kids are ill-behaved) children on other people and refusing to do anything while their kids reek havoc… or being entitled and doing s**t like changing a dirty diaper on a dinner table.”

“I respect anyone’s right to have children, but not every place is child friendly, that’s just life.”


“Get a sitter, or don’t go!”

“I will DIE ON THIS HILL!”  ~ LiterallyTyping

“I’m sorry, but this is 100% on the parents.”

“They’re choosing not to teach their kids to behave properly.”

“Yeah, babies/toddlers can only be managed to an extent, and even well-behaved kids will occasionally act out, but good parents will remove the kids promptly and deal with it.”

“They definitely don’t change a baby’s diaper on the dining table.”

“OP isn’t not inviting people for having kids.”

“They’re not inviting inconsiderate a**holes.”  ~ strangelyliteral

“NTA. If I could vote 20 times, I would.”

“They completely disregarded someone’s request to have a child-free wedding.”

“They sure as s**t would do the same to you.”

“It’s YOUR day. Not theirs.”

“If they’re going to act like children, they can stay at home.”  ~ -The-Baba-Jaga-

Well OP, Reddit is very much in your corner.

Your wedding, your rules.

Hopefully this doesn’t cause a huge family rift.

Good luck and dongratulations.