Most people are happy to lend a hand to a friend, family member, or colleague if they find themselves in a tough spot.
Unfortunately, some people are somewhat too accepting of other people’s generosity.
Resulting in their eventually expecting the help of others, whether it’s offered or not.
Often offering these kind and generous souls nothing in return.
When they learned their colleague was in something of a bind, a recent Redditor offered him a helping hand.
Unfortunately, the original poster (OP) would quickly regret their decision after hearing this colleague make a joke at their expense.
When this colleague showed no remorse for their behavior, the OP swiftly recinded their helping hand.
After being told by this colleague that they were “overreacting”, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA: for refusing to give my coworker a ride after he called me his ‘personal chauffeur’?”
The OP explained why they closed the door on helping their coworker get to work:
“I have a coworker who lives near me and I’ve given him a ride to work a few times before.”
“Well his car is now in the shop needed to get work done, and he asked for a ride again.”
“Not a big deal he even asked if I could stop by the store for him to pick up groceries and again I didn’t mind I had nothing else going on.”
“Well earlier I heard him joking about how I’m his ‘personal chauffeur’ and ‘he didn’t need to rush his car getting fixed’.”
“He asked me for a ride again today after work and I told him no, bringing up what I heard him say.”
“He said I’m over reacting and that he was just kidding.”
“I didn’t give him a ride home and he had to pay for an über.”
“Am I an a**hole for not giving him a ride home? Or was his ‘joking’ as rude as I took it.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community stood firmly behind the OP, unanimously agreeing they were not the a**hole for refusing to give their coworker a ride anymore.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s colleague was completely unworthy of receiving a ride anymore after not only showing no gratitude to the OP but also showing no remorse at his joke or for giving him a ride:
“NTA.”
“I don’t think the joke about you being his ‘personal chauffeur’ is as bad as ‘he didn’t need to rush his car getting fixed’.”
“The joke is one thing but this idea that he’s using your kindness as an excuse to hold off on getting his crap together is unacceptable.”
“He absolutely needs to get his car fixed.”
“He seems to be oblivious to the imposition that he’s putting on you.”- SomeoneYouDontKnow70
“NTA.”
“And let me guess: He hasn’t been paying for gas?”- TemptingPenguin369
“NTA!”
“While he may have been joking about you being his ‘personal chauffeur’, he certainly wasn’t kidding about not being in a rush to get his car fixed.”
“He has been saving on transport costs since you were helping him.”
“Well too bad for him, he took advantage of your generosity and now he must respect what he has sowed.”- BoredofBin
“NTA.”
“I notice you didn’t say anything about him apologizing for the comment – just making sure he told you that you were overreacting.”
“I’d not want to give him a ride again, either.”- Own_Lack_4526
“NTA.”
“‘Personal chauffeur’ sounds like a joke, but ‘didn’t need to rush…’ sounds as if he’s taking advantage of your generosity.”- Physical_School_2382
“NTA.”
“I used to be really accommodating about giving rides to coworkers when I was younger.”
“Every single person eventually tried expanding services, stopping for groceries, at the pharmacy, for fast food – stuff that made my commute an hour longer when added to their ride.”
“They ALL got irate when I said no to the extras.”
“I don’t know what causes this in human psychology, but it’s definitely a thing.”- dontlikebeige
“NTA.”
“Your co-worker needs to figure out that ‘jokes’ should be funny to everyone involved.”
“Good for you for cutting him off.”
“Now be wary of him making belittling comments at work, which might create (to your perspective) a hostile work environment.”
“He may also try to convince other co-workers to pressure you into continuing to drive him, based on the ‘it’s not a big deal’ and ‘we’re family’ attitudes so prevalent on this sub…which can be answered with OP saying to the co-workers, ‘If it’s not a big deal, you drive him’.”- CheeseMakingMom
“The joke was at your expense.”
“The expense of your kindness and the consequence is getting that taken away.”
“NTA he deserves it for being a jerk.”
“Also, chauffeurs get paid!”
“You don’t. So he can pay uber for his personal chauffeur needs now.”- lastunicorn76
“NTA.”
“He’s clearly taking advantage of your kindness, and enjoying it.”
“So now he gets to pay for uber.”
“I had a coworker pick me up a few times when I busted my foot and couldn’t drive, and I was super appreciative and offered to pay for gas, even though I was on her way home.”- Jerseygirl2468
“NTA.”
“He was rude, disrespectful and ungrateful.”
“Instead he should have told them that he really appreciates it and wants to fix the car quickly so not to inconvenience you.”- TimeRecognition7932
“NTA.”
“Guy bragging about having the chauffeur is the AH.”- Gold-Anything4274
“NTA.”
“He’s not smart.”
“He took your kindness for weakness.”
“Don’t spit on him if he’s on fire.”
“It’s also important that your other coworkers see that insulting and taking you for granted has consequences.”
“And if any of them opens their mouths to defend him then suggest that they drive him around.”- BeeJackson
“Nothing worse than someone telling you you’re overreacting instead of just doing the decent thing and apologizing.”
“NTA.”- idreaminwords
“NTA.”
“‘Gas, grass, or ass; nobody rides for free’.”- madriverdog
“NTA.”
“AT ALL.”
“The average salary of a chauffeur in the US is $22.40/hr.”
“I would send him an invoice of all the hours you helped him, and charge him retroactively.”
“Say: as you seem to think I’m actually your employee and NOT a respected coworker who was doing you a big favor, Im not doing ANYTHING for you again until you pay me back for being your ‘chauffeur’.”- Zealousideal-Log-152
“NTA.”
“Tell him you were just joking about giving him a ride in the first place, so now you’re even.”- JeepersCreepers74
“NTA.”
“When he orders Uber he also gets a personal chauffeur.”
“He just has to pay for it.”- yourmanskryptonite
“NTA.”
“He sounds incredibly ungrateful and a user.”
“Hope he doesn’t make a living at being a comedian if he thinks this is funny.”- MVHood
“NTA.”
“You were doing him a favor.”
“You’re not obligated to do favors for him especially when he’s being rude to you.”- p_0456
“NTA.”
“He bit the proverbial hand feeding him.”- Tall_Clerk9457
“Classic FOFO behavior.”
“NTA.”- PleaseCoffeeMe
“NTA.”
“I made a joke like this on purpose before because I was expected to ride with someone (a new co-worker).”
“After the second time of being told to ‘ride with me’ I finally made the comment how I love being the passenger princess and this is saving miles from being put on my car.”
“It was more to the point and a lot nicer than me saying, ‘Hey I am an adult and I can drive myself’.”
“It’s a control thing for me.”
“For your situation, you don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”
“They said that and quite honestly, joke of not, it’s got implications.”
“So, no more rides since they think they can use you for free.”- jjrobinson73
“NTA.”
“My biggest beef here is him asking for a grocery stop.”
“WTF?”- New-Grapefruit1737
“NTA.”
“He’s welcome to Uber himself around till his car gets fixed.”- IncrediblePeach6581
“NTA.”
“His comment seems demeaning.”
“As if OP is his servant, rather than an equal who was being extremely generous with their time and effort.”
“It’s the demeaning nature of his remark that stung.”- curiousity60
“NTA.”
“That’s absolutely shitty of him to take advantage and brag about it.”
“So it’s one thing for someone to say, ‘OP gave me a ride home yesterday and even took me for groceries’.”
“‘That was so kind of them, they didn’t have to do that’, and another thing to say, ‘OP gave me a ride home and even took me for groceries’.”
“‘You could say they’re like my personal chauffeur’.”
“‘I’m not gonna rush on getting my car fixed’.”
“You’re not wrong for telling him to find another way home.”
“He’s not grateful at all, and he seems very entitled and egotistical.”- RadioSupply
It is true that some people can’t take a joke.
However, it seems fairly clear that the OP’s colleague wasn’t joking, in that he was planning on mooching off the OP as much as he could.
After looking over all the charges he made to Uber on his credit card bills, perhaps the OP’s colleague might reconsider whether or not the OP was “overreacting”.