When you find out life-changing news you want to share them with all your loved ones. But, it might not hold the same weight for everyone.
We still want to feel like the center of attention for a little bit.
Redditor throwaway_023939 encountered this very issue with her sister. So she turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for moral judgment.
“AITA for supposedly ruining my sister’s news?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“So last Thursday, I (27F) adopted my new dog, Pirate. He’s 5 years old and an owner surrender.”
“I volunteer to walk dogs at my local humane society, and over the last two months, I’ve bonded with him. I told myself I would wait, see what happens. I didn’t originally want to get a new dog as my previous dog had just passed a few days before meeting Pirate. I wanted to take time and maybe try being dog free for awhile.”
“Well, that didn’t happen. I’m in a place where I can afford to have a dog and take care of one, so I adopted him.”
“Now, I didn’t tell anyone because I wanted to do a stupid reveal and be like ‘Ah! Look!’ We do a family game night every Saturday and we use my house because it’s a nice middle point for everyone to meet.”
“It was me, my parents, my two sisters, and three family friends who came. Everyone who came is either a huge dog fan, or has dog(s).”
OP was excited to share the news with her family.
“I had Pirate in the kitchen when everyone arrived. Then I told everyone I had some news to share, and then my younger sister (19F) jumped up and said ‘me too!’ So I told her she should go first.”
“In my head, I figured guest should go first.”
“She announced that she got the internship she applied for in her engineering program!”
“We were all super excited for her, we were clapping, and then Pirate started barking. Which kinda turned the attention away from her.”
“My dad asked me what my news was, and I told them to wait. I got Pirate, and we made our announcement. And everyone was extremely thrilled. I feel rude writing it, but they were more excited about seeing a dog than they were about hearing about my sisters internship.”
“As the night went on, my dad made a toast, and his words were ‘To (sister’s) internship and to our cutest little addition to game night!’ The whole night, she seemed really bummed.”
“I tried talking to her about it privately that night, but she brushed me off.”
OP’s sister couldn’t let it go.
“Then Monday came and she texted me this long ass paragraph saying how it was rude of me to spring a dog as new onto the family. She said I obviously knew my news was more exciting than hers and I should have waited to share.”
“I texted her back saying I had her share first because she was a guest in my house. Pirate was already in the house, what was I supposed to do, keep him hidden all night and hope he stays quiet?”
“We went back and forth, her increasingly angry, saying I ruined her news and this was a big jump for her future career, and it should have been more exciting for everyone to hear because she’s a female in a male dominated career.”
“She said that my news overshadowed hers and no one cared about hers.”
“I finally told her I’m sorry it ended up this way and that I’m proud of her for her accomplishment, but that I had news I wanted to share, too. And she hasn’t replied back.”
“My mom did send me one text about it, saying that my sister was still hurt, and to give her time.”
“But I honestly feel like I’m not wrong here. AITA for ruining her moment?”
Redditors gave their opinions on the situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors agreed OP was not the a**hole.
“NTA. An unfortunate situation for your sister, but you’re right. You couldn’t have just hidden a dog all night and anyway, you started with ‘I have news.'” ~ SverdarLeviosa
“It also just sounds like misplaced anger. The sister is upset because people cared more about the dog than her internship. So she’s blaming OP even though the actual problem is that her family didn’t have the reaction she wanted/expected.” ~ Tanooki07
“I mean, I was super proud when my brother got his government apprenticeship (it was a pilot scheme, normally they only took graduates and he was one of the first batch of 100 taken on) but if there had also been a dog around when he told us, I’d have seemed more excited about the dog. You can’t pet someone else’s career progression.” ~ SuperciliousBubbles
“But really, there’s also just a difference in how you can express excitement for one over the other. I’m not even a dog person but I can pet and talk to a dog for much longer than I can say ‘congrats’ ‘that’s awesome’ and ‘tell me the details!’”
“It sucks she didn’t get to be the center of attention for as long as she’d like, but I suspect she never would have been. When it’s your news, it’s all you can think about. When it’s not, it’s one of a bunch of conversation topics that night.” ~ TimelessMeow
“I mean, honestly, as a non-dog person, it wouldn’t be the biggest news ever for me. It’s just the way people interact. The dog literally demands attention so that’ll be the focus.”
“But even without the dog, news like that would be something I’d be super thrilled about when I first found out, and during the toast. But the conversation wouldn’t MAINLY be on her career the way the news-giver would want it to be.”
“There’s only so many details to listen to and compliments to give. This is a disappointment I’ve had before too, it’s Earth shattering to you but it’s just a piece of good news to everyone else.”
“But to be fair, if it were a cat, my sister knows better than to think I’d even remember she was there, so…” ~ TimelessMeow
OP should send her sister a card.