We often hear about the ongoing friction and arguments that plague some of our favorite bands. It’s worrisome because we just want them to keep pumping out the music we love to listen to, and know they’re feeling good doing it.
Rarely do we ever get an inside look at those arguments. We tend to hear about them afterword in the press.
But a recent post in the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit offered a view into those dynamics.
The Original Poster (OP), anonymously named throwaway726625, described a recent spat between her and her fellow musicians.
The title clarified exactly where the conflict began.
“AITA for telling my friend she doesn’t have the voice for singing like I do?”
OP kicked off with a broad description of the singer in question.
“My friend is a good singer, I’m not denying that. But her tone is more light and breathy. Her range is on the higher side. And she has a softer voice not a loud big voice.”
“People usually praise this as it’s ‘unique’ and ‘angelic’ often referred to if that helps explain it. She can sing low notes but I’d compare her to ariana grande, billie, Sabrina carpenter softer lower register.”
Then came the first exchange.
“We were singing along to a piano and during her part she got a bit quiet.
“I made a joke about how it would be helpful if she could actually learn how to use her chest voice since she didn’t really have one.”
“I also demonstrated how it would be easier for her if she had a voice like mine, since I have a strong musical theatre voice.”
OP offered up a suggestion.
“She responded she naturally has a softer voice naturally and different voices have different strengths. So I suggested if she can’t do it just give me her part.”
“The other girls then butted in, as they do, and said not everyone has to have the same voice type and that different sounds make the group sound interesting.”
“They also said that singing loud doesn’t mean singing good (apparently) and she sounded loud enough just a in mixed not full chest and apparently it sounded good.”
But OP’s patience wore thin.
“After some practice I started to get frustrated. The part needed a clear strong voice, not a breathy whisper voice. It’s just what’s best for the group and our success at the audition.
“So I voiced this and suggested I take her part since I don’t think she suited the song.”
That led to some terse language.
“One of the girls said in a rude tone ‘if you’re going to dictate what everyone has to sound like and act so up ur a** that anyone who doesn’t sound like you is wrong just get the fu** out’ so I just left.”
“I tried to work things out with them later on but they informed me they’ve redistributed my solos and no longer wanted me in the group.”
“I found this hurtful since I had everyone’s best interest in mind and never said she couldn’t sing. I don’t see what I did wrong.”
“AITA for literally being honest?”