in ,

Single Guy Called Out For Forcing Couple To Sleep Separately On His Birthday Trip He Paid For

A man and a woman sleeping in twin beds.
Image Source/Getty Images

There’s nothing more exciting than the idea of traveling with a group of friends.

At least in theory or on paper.

As though these might be your nearest and dearest, sometimes it’s going on your first trip with friends that all the things you do not have in common come to light.

Nor is it likely that everyone in the group will always be in agreement on what to do, where to go, and how to proceed.

Redditor jcdfryvcsww had a weekend getaway planned with his birthday with some of his closest friends.

However, the original poster (OP)’s chosen accommodation proved to throw him and his guests an unexpected curveball.

As not everyone seemed to agree that there was a given solution to room assignments.

Wondering if he was out of line for standing his ground, the OP took to the subReddit “Would I Be The A**Hole” (WIBTA), where he asked fellow Redditors:

“WIBTA to take a bigger room despite being the only single person.”

The OP explained how his planned birthday weekend hit an unexpected bump in the road owing to a rooming issue:

‘So I (39 M[ale]) am turning 40 in about a month.”

“I have a friendship group made up of 4 friends (mixed, 39) and am also friends with their partners.”

“To celebrate turning 40, I have booked a lake house for us to spend the weekend a couple hours away.”

“There are 4 couples coming, plus myself, obviously’

“The house has 5 bedrooms, 4 doubles with en-suites and one with two single beds without an en-suite.”

“The rooming situation came up recently with one of my friends and he was expecting me to take the room with the single beds and was surprised when I said I intended to take one of the bigger rooms.”

“I get his point-of-view (POV).”

“I’m the only single, so I don’t really need a double bed and the couples would obviously like to sleep together.”

“My POV is it’s my birthday, I’m paying for the whole thing so I should get first pick of rooms.”

“Besides it’s two nights, is it a big deal for one couple to sleep in separate rate beds (in the same room) just for a weekend.”

“We didn’t really reach a resolution.”

“I know he thinks I’m being an AH about it and should just take the smaller room.”

“I’m a bit worried to bring it up to the rest of the group in case they feel the same.”

“I don’t want it to put a dampener on the weekend but equally I think I should get one of the nicer rooms.”


Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for taking one of the larger rooms, and making one of the couples take the room with the twin beds.

This was generally a no-brainer for everyone, feeling that not only was it the OP’s birthday weekend, but he was also footing the entire bill, thus entitling him to his room of choice:


“It’s your birthday.”

“You’re paying for it.”

“You get the biggest room/nicest view.”

“If your friend doesn’t want a free trip, they can stay home. It’s 2 days.”

“They will survive not sleeping in the same bed.”- Secret-Air7495

“I went on a weekend cabin trip with a group of friends that included some couples for my birthday a few months ago.”

“I didn’t even pay for the entire thing and they were totally understanding with me getting one of the big rooms to myself.”

“I planned it, found the bnb, and organized the whole trip.”

“Why wouldn’t I get the room I want for my birthday?”

“None of my friends even questioned it.”

“If it’s two separate single beds btw, they can literally just push them together and voila!”

“the same width as a king bed.”

“They’ll actually get a bigger bed than anyone else.” 

“NTA.”- WorldlinessAshamed92


“If you’re paying for the whole thing I’d naturally expect you to take whatever room you want.”

“Unless you friend wants to pay a portion, he’s being unreasonable.”- Melancholic_Squirrel


“Don’t let them bully you or ruin your birthday lake trip.”

“Single people should not be ‘punished’ for being single, and couples should not be ‘treated’ to an en suite and bigger room for being a couple.”

“Couples may be two people, but they are experiencing the en suite and bigger room individually.”

“Enjoy your big room.”

“Happy birthday.”- only_grans


“You paid for it, it’s just normal you get the first pick.”

“Once of the couple can sleep apart for 2 nights, it won’t kill them.”

“They get a weekend at a lake house, they would be very lame to complain.”- IrrelevantManatee


“Your birthday and you’re paying.”

“Anyone who complains should get the worst room.”- teresajs


“It’s your birthday, and you’re paying for the whole trip.”

“You totally deserve to pick the room you want.”- romy_indy


“You pay you choose.”- actu_guy

“Whoever booked and planned the trip always gets first pick.”

“Especially if it’s their birthday.”

“Also…can’t the couple just push the beds together if they need to sleep together so badly?”

“NTA.”- SuspiciouslyDrawn

“Looks like you found the couple to give the small room to.”

“You’re paying for it, they have no say in that.”

“NTA.”- sakipith

“If you are paying for the whole thing you get to choose the bedroom you want.”

“NTA.”- Logical_Read9153


“Your birthday celebration, and you’re the one paying for the whole thing.”

“If everyone was chipping in the same amount then there could be a conversation.”

“There really should be no issue because the two single beds could also be pushed together.”

“If they can’t handle the sleeping arrangement for 2 days on a trip that paid for, they don’t need to go.”- Dry-Independent1


“I’d suggest that you pick the nicest room and the others draw lots for who picks next etc.”- MisaOEB


“You’re paying for everything.”

“Tell him that it’s your birthday, you’re paying and are taking the biggest room.”

“Remind him that he should be grateful for a weekend away where he barely has to spend any money.”- Caspian4136


“Just respond ‘great, once you send through more than 1/4 of the cost for accommodation you can pick a room’.”- MiuraSerkEdition


“You plan and pay; you get your choice of rooms.”

“Including the biggest, nicest room.”

“Anyone who thinks the remaining rooms are not up to snuff for them, do not need to come.”

“How rude of your friend!”

“But I get that you don’t want to sour the mood.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to cave to a friend who is being selfish at the moment.”

“Just let everyone know, ‘Hey guys. I’ve got [whichever room you want]’.”

“‘You figure out among yourselves who gets the remaining 4 rooms’.”

“Or ‘Hey guys, I’m taking one of the en suite rooms’.”

“After that, it’s first come, first serve on the rooms’.”

“Then everyone knows that one of them needs to take the room with the single beds and no en suite.”

“Even if one friend is being selfish about it, the majority of the group should be mature enough to deal.”

“BTW, I’ve been married almost 25 years.”

“Whenever we visited my parents house (which was quite a lot), it just wasn’t possible for me and my husband to share the same bed (though we shared the same room).”

” It was NEVER a big deal.”

“Don’t let this friend make you feel guilty.”

“Just be calm and clear and firm.”- swillshop


“But why would you want to go on a trip, and pay for said trip, for people who won’t even let you have the room you want?”- ArwenandEowyn


“You pay for it, they get a free vacation.”

“And they can put twin beds together, so they could still cuddle.”- Trevena_Ice


“You have booked the lake house, I assume you have also paid for said lake house.”

“So you get to choose the first room in the lake house.”- Dronk747


“It’s your birthday and you are paying.”

“Who pays, says.”

“That’s it.”- Effective-Mongoose57


“Can’t they push the two beds together?”- mister_barfly75


“Reminds me of when my husband & children rented a beach house years ago & my parents were coming for a few days.”

“My parents actually expected us to move out of the master while they were there!”

‘There was a perfectly nice room with a queen bed for them.”

“A couple years earlier they invited us to their time share, and expected us to sleep on the pullout sofa in the living room, I refused to go.”

“Being a married couple, and they wanted our kids and my dad’s sister & granddaughter to have rooms to themselves.”

“Nope.”- Traditional-Bag-4508

It’s understandable that some people would think more practically when it comes to rooming assignments.

However, practicality should be the given rationale for room assignments if everyone was splitting it evenly.

Considering that the OP is the one hosting this particular weekend, it’s not only fair, but logical that he should have the room of his choice.

The OP might also want to consider that as all other attendees are his invited guests, invitations can always be rescinded…

Written by John Curtis

A novelist, picture book writer and native New Yorker, John is a graduate of Syracuse University and the children's media graduate program at Centennial College. When not staring at his computer monitor, you'll most likely find John sipping tea watching British comedies, or in the kitchen, taking a stab at the technical challenge on the most recent episode of 'The Great British Baking Show'.