Safety around medications with children is important.
But at what age should a child know better?
And what should be seen as a dangerous medication?
A man is in a conflict over those questions with his sister, so he turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback.
Redditor 65789t asked:
“AITA for not locking up my meds before my nephews came over?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“Alright so I (23 male) have two nephews (14 &12) that are at my place pretty regularly. I babysit at least once a week and they sleep over at least once a month.”
“I love those little f’kers and have no problems babysitting them but I don’t go out of my way to make my apartment kid proof I mean they’re 14 and 12, I didn’t think I’d have to do anything besides locking up my liquor which I do.”
“One thing that I never put away are my meds, it’s not like it’s painkillers or anything, my body just doesn’t produce enough testosterone naturally so I have to put on testosterone gel every morning.”
“I keep the bottle in my bathroom cause I put it on after my morning showers and I don’t forget it as easily when it’s in plain sight.”
“My nephews had seen it like a year ago when I started needing it and asked about it and I explained it to them and it never came up again.”
“Well my sister went through my older nephew’s phone yesterday cause of some issues they had at home and he was apparently bragging to one of his friends how he put on some of my testosterone the last few times he was over and how his voice will get deeper now and how he’ll put on muscles because of that.”
“I guess he had been insecure about being somewhat of a latebloomer (but like absolutely in the norm for a 14 year old his friends were just a little further along in puberty) and thought stealing some of my T would help him develop faster.”
“My sister is very angry at me and thinks I should have put the testosterone in the cabinet with my liquor.”
“I think that’s bullsh*t the boy’s 14 and should know better than to steal someone’s meds especially cause I explained to them how important balanced hormone levels are and how I have to be careful not to transfer any of the gel on other people back when they asked about the bottle.”
“So he knew what he was doing was dangerous and a bullsh*t idea.”
“Now that I know what he’s done I will of course put it away but I don’t think I was in the wrong for not doing that in the first place.”
“But my sister says I should have known that the testosterone would be tempting for a boy his age and should have been more careful. I’m not entirely sure who’s in the right.”
“So AITA for not putting the testosterone away before my nephews came over?”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole, but neither was anyone else or NAH.
“NAH the sister has a right to be angry, it probably scared the sh*t out of her when she read that.”
“And you are right in believing that a 14-year old should know better.”
“The two of you need to sit the kid down and fully explain the danger of using medicine meant for another person. Like all the horrible side effects that he could get.”
“I mean, even vitamins are deadly if you use a concentrated dose meant for someone who has problems in their digestive tract.” ~ SnooDoughnuts2846
“The two of them? It’s not his kid. It’s his sisters kid.”
“She needs to parent. And she needs to be angry at her child for behaving that way.” ~ Downtown_Arachnid617
“Considering OP watches them often and knows his medicine best, he should be there. He doesn’t need to be angry at the kid, but it would be good to have a talk with him.” ~ SnooDoughnuts2846
“I would be angry at the kid. He’s old enough to know two things are really Bad: Stealing and taking other people medications.”
“He deserves some anger.” ~ LurkerNan
“Yeah that’s where I’m at. We’re not talking 4 and 2, but 14 and 12.”
“They’re waaaay too old not to know you don’t touch other people’s meds, or stuff in general, without asking.” ~ YellowBinary
“A person with opioids or any narcotic in the house damned well needs them under lock and key.”
“Testosterone isn’t really the same thing though.”
“The mother needs to give the kid a lecture on the dangers of prescription drugs and assure him that he’s quite manly enough for a 14 year old.” ~ Grace_Alcock
“NAH. You thought he wouldn’t touch the thing and based on you trusting him he doesn’t usually do stupid things like this.”
“Now you know he does this and you react accordingly.” ~ Throwawayskrskr
“NAH. I mean, a 14-year-old is definitely old enough to know not to drink your alcohol, too, right?”
“But you lock it up because you wanted to avoid any temptation.”
“I guess you didn’t think about the temptation a supply of testosterone would be to a young teen desperate to grow some body hair and muscles.”
“You would be an AH if you refused to lock the stuff up now, knowing the kid is interested. He’s probably just going to be more careful about getting caught.” ~ 3340bronqen
The OP made an assumption that his nephews are more considerate and responsible than they are.
Thinking his nephews have the maturity and intelligence at 12 and 14 not to use other people’s medications didn’t make him an a**hole.
The boy’s mother wasn’t an a**hole for being scared, but she needed to blame the right person—her son.
Hopefully they can mend this fence and have a discussion with the actual guilty party over violating people’s trust and stealing people’s medication so something similar doesn’t happen in the future.