All of us have some sort of routine to help get us through the day.
Even if the particulars of said routine don’t really add much value to our physical health, they might still make all the difference in our happily getting through work and everything else our day has in store for us.
As such, when our routine goes even the tiniest bit disrupted, we might find ourselves distracted, and have difficulty getting through things we previously had no problem with.
And we might find our mood likewise dampened.
The husband of Redditorthrowaways79976 had developed a new morning routine, which seemed to have positive effects.
So much so, in fact, that when the original poster (OP)’s husband overslept, effectively missing his daily routine, he wasted no time on unleashing his anger on the OP.
Even throwing the blame all but entirely on them.
Wondering if they had, in fact, done anything wrong, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for not waking my husband up for his 5AM walk?”
The OP explained how their husband found himself off their regular morning schedule, and felt the OP was to blame for it.
“So for the past month, my (36) husband (39) has waking up at 5 every night to have a walk.”
“These walks would take about 2 hours.”
“Side note to mention that this new, he’s not trying to lose weight, pretty thin, he’s not athletic by nature nor has sports interests or hobbies.”
‘In fact, he hated doing any type of sport.”
“I’m happy for him since it’s an overall positive thing.”
“But yesterday, he came home in the evening after working for long hours then stayed up late playing with his phone.”
“I went to bed at 10 after getting done with the mess and everything.”
“I woke up by him yelling at me at 7 am asking me why I didn’t wake him up for his 5am walk.”
“He said he missed it and I’m responsible for that.”
“I was so confused I said that first of all, he always wakes up by setting his alarm, why should I be expected to wake him up this time.”
“He yelled that he forgot to set his alarm.”
“I said so what?”
“It’s no big deal, it’s not like he missed an important meaning or something, but he got more angry and said that those walks help improve his health and restore his energy and help him feel better.”
“I made a comment about how missing one walk won’t hurt but he unloaded on yelling about how I was trying to prevent him for doing his hobby for some unknown reason.”
“I told him he was sorely mistaken even though I admit that those daily 5am walks around the veteran’s park are weird but also his reaction?”
“I really thought it was over the top.”
“He stormed off and went to shower saying I ruined his entire day.”
“When he got out he started avoiding and ignoring me.”
“Even when I talk to him directly.”
“He went to work and refused to respond to my calls.”
“Really, I’m at a loss like maybe it was something I said about his walks.”
“but I really don’t know. he’s sulking nonstop as of now and I’m literally about to lose my mind.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community wholeheartedly agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for not waking up their husband for his walk.
Everyone agreed that it was in no way the OP’s responsibility for waking their husband up at such an early hour, with many left very curious as to what exactly their husband got up to on those walks after his bizarre behavior.
“Whilst I wouldn’t have initially found the daily walks odd his reaction definitely is!”
“Wake him up at 5am every day for the next week and go walking with him to ‘make up for’ not waking him up today.”
“Bet he comes up with an excuse why you can’t join him.”
“We’re gonna need an update after you find out what he’s really doing at 5am.”- whorlando_bloom
“NTA and I’m not convinced he’s just ‘going for a walk’.”- Strawberry1217
“I am with everyone else so far.”
“This isn’t a two hour walk.”
“He is either doing drugs or meeting someone for sex.”
“No one who is super tired and forgot to set an alarm, would be that mad about missing a walk, unless something is happening on that walk.”- Emotional_Fan_7011
“My gut feeling says he’s up to something.”
“I think the reason he is so upset is because he missed a planned rendezvous with someone he can’t easily text or call.”
“Follow him next time, hopefully I am wrong.”- inushtook90
“In addition to what everyone else is saying, I’m noticing he stayed up playing on his phone while you were up till TEN dealing with ‘the mess and everything’.”
“Does your husband contribute to the household at all?”
‘Is there always an unfair expectation of labor division that negatively affects you?”
“There’s just a lot of red flags in this post.”- gayforaliens1701
“He always set his alarm, he had no reason to believe you’d even be awake at 5:00 AM to wake him up, and he didn’t ever ask you to wake him up, and yet he’s mad at you because he didn’t wake up?”
“That is a very strange reaction.”
“Is there any way to convince him to see a doctor?”- SamSpayedPI
“There’s something else going on here.”- shawshawthepanda
“My former FIL started taking an evening walk out of nowhere ‘for his health’.”
“Turns out he was going to bang a woman in her car.”
“Hopefully that’s not what your husband is doing, but if it is it’s not your responsibility to make sure it happens.”- Myup902
“Ok everyone what are we saying: affair, drugs, booze, gambling or something else?”
‘Given the time of day, I’m betting he’s buying drugs.”- Redphantom000
“Who is he meeting up with during those walks?”- Frosty-Mall4727
“He’s not just walking.”
“He’s doing something else, you now need to turn detective and find out what.”
“And also, major red flag alert.”
“Methinks something shady’s goin down.”- Kimmm711
‘Hmmm He is engaging in behavior that is completely outside of character and is now behaving irrationally.”
“I say he’s either having an affair or he has a brain tumor.”
“While I’m being hyperbolic, as there’s obviously not enough info to say that definitively, it does sound like something is up.”
“This is all very suspicious and none of it has to do with going for walks.”
“You know we’re all thinking the same thing, what the hell is he doing?”
“You better find that out and protect yourself from whatever it is he’s planning.”
“Please don’t ignore this and don’t hide in denial, something is going on.”- overdownyonder
“NTA and his reaction is very weird.”
“You have never previously been responsible for his walk wake-up call, you were not asked this time to wake him up, and you were also asleep at the time he was meant to walk.”
“This is not even your fault through unreasonable logic.”
“Is it possible he is a: doing something shady on his walks or b: has had a health scare you don’t know about?”- whateverbernice
“Might be drugs.”
“Maybe he is meeting his dealer every morning and then he has some time to consume.”
“Especially as he is avoiding you and yelling he might have withdrawal symptoms.”
“I would check what he is doing.”
“Maybe you can check where his phone is at that time or just follow him.”- MillipedePaws
“Obviously you’re NTA.”
“You were sleeping, how were you supposed to wake him?”
“It wasn’t your responsibility at all to wake him up but his reaction is certainly alarming.”
“Why would he be having such a strong reaction to missing one morning of his walk?”- bluemonker0
“And I get how suspicious these walks seem but I will add my sister suffers from OCD and she also wakes up to walk and work out for 2 hours before work.”
“Ahe is obsessed with it and would also freak out if she missed it.”
‘So that is another possible reason for this very odd behavior.”- pamsquatch
One can’t help but feel that the OP’s husband needing to be up at five on the dot might have been owing to the fact that he needed to be at a certain place at a certain time.
Otherwise, why couldn’t he have simply taken his walk when he got up?
Even if that still doesn’t excuse his behavior towards the OP.
One hopes that the two have them have an open, and civil, conversation about this, which ideally will include an apology from the OP’s husband.
As well as some answers to some of the above questions.