Our homes are meant to be our safe spaces, an oasis for us to escape to at the end of a hard day.
They most certainly aren’t meant to be a space that others can trespass onto, pointed out the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITAH) subReddit.
Redditor DMLives had spent a lot of time and money making his home his own, including his backyard and Koi pond. Not only was it something he was proud of, but it had become an important hobby and escape for him.
Not only did his neighbor’s son constantly trespass onto his property, but when he even damaged the Koi pond and the fish inside, the Original Poster (OP) felt like he had no choice but to sue to restore his peace.
He asked the sub:
“AITAH for suing my neighbor after their kid trespassed and fell into my koi pond?”
The OP was deeply proud of his home, especially his backyard oasis.
“I (22 Male) have a koi pond in my backyard. It’s not just any koi pond; it’s a full-blown, professionally designed Japanese garden with a bridge, waterfalls, and koi that cost more than my car (I’m talking $1,000 for a single fish).”
“Maintaining this pond is my pride and joy. I’ve put years into this hobby, and my yard is securely fenced with ‘No Trespassing’ signs everywhere.”
His neighbor, Karen, had no respect for his space.
“Enter my neighbor, ‘Karen’ (this is a fake name, but fitting for her). Karen has a son, Timmy (8 Male), who is notorious for wandering into other people’s yards uninvited.”
“I’ve talked to Karen multiple times about this, but she just brushes it off with, ‘Kids will be kids.'”
Karen’t disrespect caused harm to the OP, his property, and almost Timmy.
“Last week, while I was out running errands, I got a frantic call from Karen. Apparently, Timmy climbed over my fence to ‘feed the fish’ (even though I have explicitly told him to stay out).”
“In doing so, he slipped, fell into the pond, and destroyed part of my carefully maintained ecosystem. Several of my prized koi died due to stress, and the filtration system was damaged because of the debris Timmy kicked in.”
“Luckily, Timmy wasn’t seriously hurt, just a few scrapes, but Karen has been demanding I pay for his medical bills. She claims my pond is an ‘attractive nuisance’ and that I should’ve had a cover or something to prevent kids from falling in.”
Disgusted, the OP responded in kind.
“I argued that it’s a private, fenced property, and that her son had no business being there in the first place.”
“When I refused to pay, Karen lost it and started badmouthing me to the whole neighborhood, calling me ‘heartless’ and a ‘terrible person.'”
“I’ve since filed a lawsuit against her for the cost of the koi, the damage to my filtration system, and repairs to my pond, which is over $5,000 in total.”
“Some of my friends think I’m taking it too far, saying, ‘He’s just a kid,’ but others agree that Karen should’ve been watching him better.”
“Am I really wrong for suing my neighbor after her kid trespassed and destroyed my koi pond?”
“AITAH?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some argued that the mother was totally to blame for not watching her son more closely.
“NTA. Mom needs to supervise her son better. Period.” – TarzanKitty
“I have said it before and I’ll say it again, ‘kids will be kids’ means behavior issues are to be expected AND DEALT WITH, not that misbehaving is to be accepted and uncorrected.” – Renault935
“At eight years old, if your child has a tendency to wander into people’s yards multiple times even though he’s told not to, he needs an evaluation. Eight is old enough to understand the risk of this behavior IF your parent is properly parenting you.”
“NTA. Karen needs a reality check!” – No_Ordinary944
“I have a seven-year-old nephew who is mentally disabled. Even he understands the concept of not being allowed to go somewhere. Timmy either has serious problems or needs proper parenting.” – Mermaidgirl916
“This is honestly terrifying. As a mother of a young daughter, I can’t imagine just letting my kid wander around the neighborhood, I don’t care how well I think I know my neighbors, there are some serious freaks out there for one.”
“But aside from how many terrible dangerous people are out there, you don’t just let your child go wandering about getting into s**t they don’t have to right to be messing with. Karen needs to be taught a serious lesson here.”
“I can’t even believe she would try to get OP to pay the medical bills when he’s said to this kid not to go there, no trespassing means exactly that. It’s not Karen’s freaking property, d**n right he should sue her for the damages and the deaths of his poor Koi.”
“She sounds like a horrible mom. No offense, Karen, but letting your kid do whatever they want with zero repercussions is a fast track to failure in the future (assuming the kid who is probably being neglected doesn’t die because of her negligence). I don’t see how anybody could disagree with OP suing honestly.”
“And an ‘attractive nuisance’? Tell your freaking child to behave and make him listen to you! Don’t let him roam around into other people’s yards, the f**k? Insanity. Something terrible is going to happen with this kid if she doesn’t start giving him consequences for his actions, and face her own for her miserable fails at parenting.”
“Pay up, Karen, and stop giving your kid free-rein over the neighborhood when it could get him injured again, or even worse, potentially kidnapped or killed. Sounds like they both need to learn a serious lesson here. For their own good.” – annikatidd
“If Karen keeps this crap up, OP should contact child services. Not as some sort of petty revenge, but because that other’s ‘parenting’ is allowing her child to repeatedly put himself in life-threatening situations.”
“It’s one thing to be a hands-off parent, it’s another thing to enable them (which is what she’s doing by putting the blame on the person who has fences up to keep her special snowflake out, rather than teaching her child to respect those boundaries) to regularly venture into off-limits dangerous areas they’ve been barred from.” – QueenMotherOfSneezes
Others agreed and urged the OP to sue the family for damages and justice for his koi.
“Those poor fishes died of shock. Why would anyone think that’s OK or not a big deal? And the kid could have died too if it was a pool or something.”
“She doesn’t want to take care of the kid. She doesn’t want to control him or anything. When will she stop? She is right. He is just a kid, but she is not. The issue is not the kid is the mother. Saying he is just a kid, is just a deflection of her responsibility.”
“OP, sue her. Maybe she will become a better parent, not to have to pay others for future messes. Also, add a camera. I don’t think it will be beyond her to damage your property in retaliation.”
“If anyone says anything to you again, tell them you are doing it for the kid because his mom needs to change and to try and to prevent more pointless deaths.”
“NTA.” – SkyLightk23
“You have a right to protect your property and enjoy your hobby peacefully. It’s crucial to consult with a lawyer specializing in property law and personal injury. They can provide advice tailored to your specific circumstances and jurisdiction.” – HarperLibraEclipse
“Fun fact: electric fence units that can put off a horse/cattle charge are only around $100 at Tractor Supply or probably cheaper online. String a wire around the property or the pond and it’ll give enough of a shock that a trespasser will remember to stay far away in the future. A lower voltage unit for sheep and goats would probably be sufficient to startle a person and make them leave.” – Key-Cook-219
“NTA. Not at all. You received damages on your private property due to a trespasser. Your koi pond is gated behind fencing, that is ‘something preventing kids from falling in.'”
“Absolutely hold this person accountable (the mother). She seems very spoiled/entitled and needs a reality check.” – Krescentia
“He’s a kid now who thinks he can go where he wants and do what he wants with impunity, but soon enough he’s going to be a teenager who thinks he can go where he wants and do what he wants with impunity and boy is he going to be surprised when that impunity turns out to be legal consequences instead.”
“He’s eight. Barring something genuinely impacting his brain chemistry like ODD, this is entirely on Karen’s sh*t parenting. Even with ODD or something of the ilk, it still falls to the parent to take responsibility of the sh*t their children do.”
“This is the kind of sh*t I advocate pre-empting the neighborhood gossip narrative for: after the second time of preventing the issue with a one-on-one, get started spreading your concern about the misbehavior with the other neighbors and friends so they know when the s*ht finally hits the fan, it’s not you overreacting, it’s you at the end of your rope.” – your_average_plebian
The subReddit was deeply disturbed by the neighbor’s behavior and advocacy for her son’s trespassing and damaging the OP’s property and the death of his koi.
Clearly, the OP needed to step up and further privatize his home and sue his neighbor for damages; otherwise, she’d likely have no incentive ever to stop her son from trespassing.