in , ,

Teen Livid After Older Sister Fakes Her Own Death To Manipulate Her After A Major Falling Out

Sisters fighting
Ben-Schonewille / Getty Images

*The following article contains discussion of suicide/self-harm.

Family can be difficult.

These are people who have known you for longer than anyone else, and thereby, know your buttons better than most.

So what happens when a relative presses those buttons but goes from annoyance to cruelty?

That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) Stock_Health_1033 when she came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.

She asked:

“AITA for telling my sister I hate her for ruining my trip in the worst way possible?”

OP began with a little history.

“I (17f) recently had a falling out with my sister (23) in September.”

“We haven’t talked in about 4 months due to issues involving our mother and sides were chosen on her half that I had no intention of being okay with, so I stepped away and went no contact with both of them.”

She then moved on to current events.

“I went on a trip to see my long-distance boyfriend for the first time since dating for 7 months.”

“I was ecstatic and so happy to finally be with him for his birthday and have some time to be together.”

Everything was fine, until…

“On the 3rd day of my trip, I get a call from my sister that I declined, I didn’t want any drama that always came along with answering her calls and left it alone.”

“I then get a call from her boyfriend who’s freaking out and sobbing, he tells me that my sister had gotten into a head-on crash with a truck and died.”

“Of course, I was absolutely hysterical, I couldn’t walk I was in so much anguish.”

“I frantically packed my bags and called my dad to tell him what just happened and if he could get me a ticket.”

“He did, my boyfriend came with me on the courtesy of my dad not wanting me to be alone.”

“I fly out at 3 in the morning and get picked up by my dad, I’m still losing my mind over my sister.”

“It takes an hour from the airport to her house so I call her bf’s number telling him I’ll be there, and I need to know what happened when I get there.”

“I get there and run to the door with my dad in tow, my bf stays in the car out of respect, and I frantically wait to be let in.”

“My sister answers the door with the biggest sh*t-eating grin on her face, she says ‘so you do care about me?'”

“Me and my dad are floored.”

“My dad immediately gets angry (in the saddest way possible) and bitter towards her and starts to huff and puff at her about how her pulling this isn’t a joke.”

“She just shrugs at it and says towards me: ‘I only did it so I know you’d even care since you like to choose favorites with our parents.'”

“I’m still speechless at that point, I gathered enough of myself to tell her that the reason I stopped talking to mom was because of years of mental and emotional abuse and manipulation, that I couldn’t take being used as a middleman or the family failure scapegoat.”

“I told her I just had the worst 7 hours of my life and that this just showed that SHE didn’t care enough about me to think how this would affect me mentally.”

“Never in my life have I ever felt such grief, sadness, and anguish. I was a mess.”

“I told her I hate her.”

“I left her house, and my dad got us to a cheap hotel to sleep at.”

“I’m still getting texts from her and my mom for what I said was rude and how I reacted was unnecessary for a ‘little test.”’

OP was left to wonder,

“I feel like I may have overreacted but I just need some outside perspective, AITA?”

Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment.

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided: NTA

Some felt that turnabout was fair play in this case.

“NTA. “

“You should continue to grieve and pretend her ‘little’ prank was real.”

“She should be out of your life forever. No sane person would do this.”

“Send her a copy of ‘The Boy Who Cried Wolf’ and then change your number.” ~ mesutora

“Send a condolence card to the bf and how sad you are for your sister’s death.” ~ bayshorevgllc

“I was thinking the same.”

“The sister wanted OP to believe she was dead. Give her what she wants.”

“The only way to deter manipulative lies and games is to not play. React as if the person meant what they said/did, and they weren’t lying.”

“Game over.” ~ newbeginingshey

Commenters were concerned that this was more about mental health.


“This is not a test this is serious.”

“WTH, who does this.”

“Go no contact.”

“Also I’m not for posting drama on Facebook et.”

“But let your friends and family know what happened.”

“Your mom and sister have serious mental health issues.” ~ mummamai


“No, you did NOT overreact.”

“Your sister is sick in the head as far as I’m concerned. That isn’t remotely normal nor acceptable behavior under any circumstance.” ~ FSF_VVG

“You didn’t overreact at all.”

“Your Sister ruined your holiday, and cut short the small amount of time you had with your long-distance partner.”

“That’s just the beginning.”

“What kind of fully grown adult puts their teenage sister through the mental anguish of thinking their estranged Sister is dead? It’s absolutely unhinged, honestly.”

“And her boyfriend is also a huge AH for going through with it.”

“The only silver lining to this story is that your sister has given you the biggest reminder you needed to continue going NC.”

“NTA.” ~ Kellalizard

Others saw legal ramifications to this issue.


“Added to this I would consider suing her for the cost of the plane tickets and emotional distress.”

“And don’t forget to tag her boyfriend into this as well.”

“I hope he wakes up after participating in this and leaves her.” ~ Throwawayhater3343

“This. Not a small claims court either. Both of them. Now.”

“Personally I’d see if there’s some type of criminal complaint you could make too.”

“AAAANNNNNDDD If I was truly petty, I’d contact the three major credit report agencies + banks + social administration and report her as deceased on the day of her ‘accident.'”

“I’d also post an obituary at & on FB.”

“She wants to be dead, fine.”

“LET’S TAKE IT TO THE MAX! She’d be so busy trying to get her life reestablished, it would take A LOT of effort, that she’d forget about you. Maybe.”

“But NC is really best from now on. She’s f*cking looney.” ~ Bring-out-le-mort

“Go no-contact AFTER taking her to court for fraud.”

“She needs to pay every penny of the cost of your travel back, including mileage for the car your father drove.”

“Make her pay every single penny including the cost of getting BACK to your boyfriend.”

“Once you have the check, you never need to encounter her again.” ~ maroongrad

Commenters had another word for this behavior.

“Please listen to this.”

“If you can as soon as you are able, go NC with your mother and your sister.”

“I fear that your sister is acting like your mother in terms of emotional manipulation and abuse.”

“ETA: Took out ‘is going to start’ because she already is. I get it, guys. She is full-on manipulative.” ~ dazechong

“The sister already is.”

“The whole ‘she died’ deal while knowing she was out of town and everything was nothing but emotional manipulation and some serious mental abuse!”

“Then to act like it’s no big deal? Pfffft!! Get on outta here with your stupid sh*t.”

“Nta Op!” ~ TheBlueLady39

Some even shared personal stories.

“‘wth who does this'”

“The first time I experienced death was when an old friend from primary school passed from suicide. I only had good memories of him and I was really shaken and upset and scared.”

“I was 15 I think.”

“About a month later, this guy on kik pretended to be his mother (not the guy who passed away, just his own mother) and messaged me that he was dead and that he killed himself.”

“It was obvious it was just him, but I was so, so careful and sensitive about suicide at the time that I just went along with it and gave his ‘mother’ my condolences.”

“When he confessed a few days later that he wasn’t dead and it was just to see who cared enough, I blew up at him.”

“Told him how awful it was to do that to someone, that I was literally still grieving someone who actually died by suicide, and that this kind of thing isn’t a joke.”

“He got mad at me for getting angry*,* insulted me, and said I must be pms-ing, and that I was a hysterical crazy b*tch for getting mad about this.”

“Some people are just… yeah.” ~ higaroth

Relatives can be challenging, but this goes way beyond the pale!

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at

Written by Frank Geier

Frank Geier (pronouns he/him) is a nerd and father of three who recently moved to Alabama. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human.