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Vegetarian Accused Of ‘Ruining’ Their Server’s Day By Sending Back Their Meal Twice

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With restaurants slowly beginning to resume operations at normal capacity in many places around the world, there is a collective sense we should be patient and kind to servers who have been out of work for a long time.

Reddit nowwhat887 took this into consideration when going out with friends to a restaurant.

But when the Redditor was judged for reacting to a recurring issue, they visited the “Am I the a**hole?” (AITA) subReddit and asked:

“AITA for sending my food back, not once, but twice?”

The Original Poster (OP) wrote:

“For context, restaurants in Ontario were just allowed to open patio effective this past Friday.”

“Everyone is pumped, but also there have been a lot of messages on social media to be extra nice to your servers and wait staff etc.”

“I’ve worked in the industry before, so I understand how tough it can be. Actually I think everyone should work in the service industry at some point in their life because it’s such a valuable lesson….. but I digress….”

“So I go out with a few friends this weekend and hit up a patio. We order food and drinks and all is good. Food comes. Mine has chicken on it, it’s all mixed in with the rest of the food.”

“I am a vegetarian and ordered a veggie meal. I get all weird because I know that it’s a tough time for the restaurant industry etc.”

“So when the waiter comes over and asks how things are, I say that there is chicken in my meal and I am vegetarian. She apologizes profusely and I’m like no worries, I understand it’s busy.. take your time.”

“A little while passes and the food comes out again but this time it’s a different waiter. Chicken on it again. At this point I’m like ok, if I send it back again I’m for sure getting my meal spit in.”

“The server comes back and asks how everything is, and I say that the meal came out with chicken again. She was horrified and on the verge of tears.”

“I tell her that it’s ok but I won’t get a replacement this time because we have to leave soon. Of course I was a bit annoyed but knew that they had a lot going on with just having reopened etc, and I was nice to the server – no attitude.”

“My friends who I was with, who just so happen to work in the industry, told me that I should have just pretended everything was ok and not ‘ruined her day’ by sending the food back twice, when referring to the waiter.”

“I was taken aback because I thought I was accommodating and super nice to the girl. They then proceeded to judge me for leaving only a 20% tip on the bill saying I should have left more because she took off the meal that the restaurant had to deliver twice.”

“Should I never go to a restaurant again?”

“Am I the a**hole?”

Strangers on the internet were asked to declare one of the following:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

A majority of Redditors sided with the OP as not the a**hole for sending the food back.

NTA. ‘Mine has chicken on it, it’s all mixed in with the rest of the food. I am a vegetarian and ordered a veggie meal’.”

“1000% legit reason for sending food back.”

“‘Chicken on it again’. JFC.”

“‘My friends who I was with, who just so happen to work in the industry, told me that I should have just pretended everything was ok and not “ruined her day” by sending the food back twice’.”

“Whoever ruined someone’s time here, it was not you.” – StAlvis

“You’re a vegetarian. You don’t eat meat. Did your friends think you can just suck it up and eat the chicken? How can the restaurant mess up again?”

“I think I heard of some people suing restaurants for serving meat to vegetarians (re: false advertisements/fraud). I don’t know much about it but this situation reminded me of that.” – hainowele


“It wasn’t rude. They got your order wrong and you were polite about it. And lying to the waiter wouldn’t have made you any more polite.” – AlarmClockGoBrrr

“NTA, you still left a 20% tip even though your food was wrong twice. You also didn’t blow up at the server.”

“I’m sure the server was super stressed because of the fact restaurants just reopened up there. Someone else may have ended up with your vegetarian meal twice. You were certainly nicer than a lot of people would have been, fulfilling the stereotype of our country.” – BohemianGraham

“NTA she’s actually gonna remember how nice you were considering she messed up twice and a lesser person would have really ruined her day.” – azh88

“NTA – you responded reasonably and politely. You’re a vegetarian and the restaurant kept bringing you meat. You made it clear you didn’t want it. That’s why the servers were horrified. Not at you.” – Portie_lover

“NTA. Your friends are a**holes. Like, I would not eat at a restaurant with them as wait staff if that is their attitude.”

“You did not receive edible food, the waiter did not do the bare minimum of her job, which is to act as middle man and run interference between you and the kitchen, you did not owe them money to just sit there at the table hungry.”

“WTF would you pay extra to not get to eat? If your friends had their way, you would have paid for the privilege of not getting anything, and then left a 50% tip on top, which is ridiculous and entitled to think you ‘owe’ the business that, simply because it’s a restaurant, not a hardware store.”

“You were above the board kind, and very generous to leave a tip at all (that restaurant better not have given you a bill after that).”

“Go to many restaurants in the future, just with different, non a**hole, friends.” – radleynope

“NTA. First America with the crazy tipping rules and now Canada I guess. You should tip MORE because they f’ked up your meal twice??”

“A tip is for GOOD service and you shouldn’t feel any guilt whatsoever for simply expecting yo get what you ordered. Ridiculous.” – coolpiggie

“NTA. Unless you create the virus, it is not your fault that the restaurant industry suffered.”

“You couldn’t eat your meal. You asked them to fix it but they still screwed it up. You did not lose your mind but was understandably annoyed.”

“Tell your friends to go kick rocks because you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact you were more understanding than most people would be.” – gbstermite

Overall, Redditors agreed the OP was not wrong for sending back the food they could not consume. They praised the OP for giving a reasonable tip and interacting kindly with the server in spite of being inconvenienced.

Written by Koh Mochizuki

Koh Mochizuki is a Los Angeles based actor whose work has been spotted anywhere from Broadway stages to Saturday Night Live.
He received his B.A. in English literature and is fluent in Japanese.
In addition to being a neophyte photographer, he is a huge Disney aficionado and is determined to conquer all Disney parks in the world to publish a photographic chronicle one day. Mickey goals.
Instagram: kohster Twitter: @kohster1 Flickr: nyckmo