Roommates can be a handful.
It takes a special kind of bond to share a space together.
Roommates can often step over the line.
Case in point…
Redditor Resident_Gate_4758 wanted to discuss her story for some feedback. So naturally she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
She asked:
“She asked:AITA for refusing to get rid of my plush toy when my roommate asked?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I know this may sound childish, but let me explain.”
“I (18 F[emale]) have frequent night terrors, and have since I was around 12.”
“When it got to the point that I wasn’t sleeping because of them, my parents tried to find something like a comfort item that would help me get to sleep.”
“I have a small, plush bear that I’ve had for a few years now and it’s the only thing which I absolutely need most nights.”
“I’ve been living in a small dorm for quite a while by myself.”
“However recently a transfer student (19 F[emale]) has been moved into my dorm room.”
“We have separate bedrooms and usually don’t come into each other’s rooms often.”
“Last week she came to me and asked if I was alright with her family (dad, mum and one kid) coming around to visit for a few hours.”
“I said I was a-okay with it, as long as she lets me know what day they were coming over.”
“As I was cleaning up my room for this surprise visit, she notices my plush.”
“She made a few comments about it being childish and old, but I didn’t really mind.”
“Just a few hours later she came up to me and asked ‘Hey, so you know about my brother?’”
“I replied with ‘yes, what about him?'”
“She then asked if I could give him the plush, as ‘I didn’t need it’ and ‘It’d be in better hands with him.'”
“I tried to calmly explain that it was one of the few things I wouldn’t give up easily.”
“As without it I wouldn’t be able to sleep or calm myself if I did have a nightmare.”
“But she kept on with the same points about how ‘I can just get another one.'”
“‘It’s not a big deal.'”
“I eventually snapped and told her that I wouldn’t be giving anything to her brother if she kept up with not listening to my reasoning, before she scoffed and stormed off to her room.”
“Again, I know it sounds childish (and it probably is looking back on it), but…”
“Am I the a**hole for it?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors declared our OP was NOT the A**hole.
It’s a tricky situation.
Let’s hear some thoughts…
“Are you the a**hole for telling someone you won’t give them one of your belongings that has sentimental and practical value?”
“Bruh. NTA. But if I were you I’d start keeping your stuff under lock and key.”
“This girl clearly thinks she has some weird claim on your stuff for no apparent reason.” ~ ASpoolOfTales
“This. OP, if I were you, I would keep my eyes on the teddy 24/7 until her family is gone.”
“I wouldn’t trust her to take it and give it to her brother as soon as you’re looking the other way.”
“Maybe keep the plushie on you, put it in your backpack/bag and take it to lectures, the library, cafes etc with you and never leave it unattended when she is around or in a place she can easily access.”
“I wouldn’t trust her an inch, better be safe than sorry.” ~ lazyfoxheart
“My mother did this while I was still a child, constantly gave my beloved plushies (among other items) away.”
“Of course everyone that meets adult me is weirded out by how possessive I can be about seemingly worthless items.”
“Oh and if OP reads this I still have 2 plushes that have moved everywhere with me and I will hold on to them til they disintegrate.” ~ MonkeyPukeMadness
“NTA Yes, please keep the plushie safe!”
“I’m 40 and i have a collection of round plush sheep.”
“Two come always with me on vacation and zoos or so.”
“The look out of my bag and are placed on photos. Who cares what others think.” ~ Sheeps_n_Birds
“I’m 40 and have a stuffed Eeyore that I will never give up.”
“I’m currently in a motel right now due to work being done in my apartment and Eeyore is with me.”
“My Dad bought him for me in Disney World when I was 16.”
“It was our last big vacation with him and I cherish this toy.”
“He went to college with me.”
“Every move, any extended time away from home.”
“It reminds me of my Dad and one of the last times I was truly happy.”
“I have awful anxiety and sometimes hugging him at night helps.”
“I even asked my therapist if it was silly and she said no.”
“So… Eeyore is my bro.”
“OP is definitely NTA. Keep Teddy safe!!” ~ StrangerKatchoo
OP had some thanks to give…
“Thank you so much for everyone’s advice for me! “
“I’ll definitely be locking it in one of my drawers during the day so she can’t ‘accidentally’ give it to her brother in a few days.”
She kept listening…
“Girl NTA.”
“But I think she might take other things from your room in retaliation because she sounds super weird.”
“Asking you a stranger to give your stuffy to her little brother a stranger that is just weird.”
“Lock your door and put it away in the locked draw and report this incident or if possible take it around with you.” ~ SpendPuzzleheaded161
“Just wanted to add to the voices, NTA.”
“I’m 30 and have multiple stuffed toys for no other reason than I love them??”
“My ‘main’ cuddly toy has been with me since I was 7.”
“She ain’t going anywhere and no one has a right to tell you what is and isn’t ‘childish.'”
“It’s such a weird thing that society pushes at us.”
“Who cares if you sleep with a teddy? It affects literally no one (but you).” ~ Sabrielle24
“NTA. your roommate can go f**k herself.”
“Your plush has sentimental value, and it actually helps you with your terrors.”
“You explained this to her and yet she’s still pushed and then tried to downplay the plush’s importance to you.”
“It doesn’t matter if you can get another one.”
“That plush you currently have is the one you already treasure. you don’t owe her sh*t.”
“I suggest you hide it from her because she might steal it to give to her brother then pass it as no big deal because she obviously lacks the ability to understand to as why you can’t let go of your plush.”
“If she wants to give her brother a plush so bad, then she can just go and buy one for him.”
“By the way, you’re not childish at all for this.” ~ Hefty_Row4197
“NTA. No one has the right to demand your belongings off you and that goes doubly when the item has significance and is fulfilling a function.”
“You’re room-mate is an entitled AH who seems to have never heard the word ‘no.'”
“I’d give this family a wide berth and I would especially keep your plush with you at all times.”
‘If it’s ‘not a big deal’ then she can put her hand in her own pocket and buy her brother a plush.” ~ Neither_March4000
“NTA. No matter if it was a comfort item or a bag of chips or a dirty sock, it is yours.”
“You are under no obligation to gift your belongings to another person regardless of their feelings about it.”
“If it would be so easy to get another bear, then why wouldn’t she just go get something for her brother?”
“Her argument is it is meaningless to you, but her time/effort is too valuable to be wasted on HER brother. Nonsense.:
“If she addresses it again, simply say that your cousin is coming to visit and would like her favorite sweater/chair/car and you’d like her to give it away.” ~ not_your-momma
“NTA.”
“Go march your butt into her room take something and tell her she doesn’t need it as she is spoiled enough as it is and it would be better enjoyed by someone who has less.”
“She can always buy another at some point.”
“I’d like to know who put her in charge of what people are too old for or what they can or can not collect.”
“Also as someone else has mentioned, lock your bedroom door and if you don’t have a lock, get one.” ~ Meatloaf_Mondai
“NTA. Her brother needs Jack shit of your belongings.”
“If he needs it more, Little Miss Entitled can go buy him his own.”
“Also, hide the plushie/lock your room.”
“Your plushie might go wandering off one day.”
“And why we are at it, why are you tidying YOUR room for THEIR visit?”
“They have no need or right to look or be in your room.”
“Obviously keep it clean and tidy, but if its mess when her guests are over, shut the door.” ~ HunterDangerous1366
OP… Reddit has your back.
People can’t just give away other people’s belongings.
It’s time for a chat with roomie.
Good luck.