For all the stress and anxiety that comes with planning a wedding, doing so can also be incredibly fun.
After all, a wedding is you and your partner’s special day, which means you get to decide exactly how you want it.
So, for all the not-so-fun activities (namely table assignments), there are plenty of activities that soon-to-be-married folks look forward to with excitement, such as choosing attire, finding a venue, and perhaps most of all, the tasting.
When the future-sister-in-law (FSIL) of Redditor throwawayweddingcake found herself having something of a hard time, the original poster (OP) and her fiancé decided to open up their home to her.
To further help her bounce back, the OP even invited her FSIL to join her and her fiancé in one of their wedding planning events.
Unfortunately, the OP’s FSIL quickly took advantage of the OP’s generosity, resulting in the OP and her fiancé deciding there was only one thing to do.
Worried that she may have gone too far, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for sending my FSIL to my future-mother-in-law (FMIL)’s place after she refused to pay for the wedding cake samples she and her friends ate?”
The OP explained why her FSIL went from being a welcome guest in her house to persona-non-grata:
“I (27 F[emale]) and my fiancé “Leo” (27 M[ale]) decided to let my FSIL “Maya” (32 F) stay at our house because she needed space from her husband due to some relationship struggles they’re having.”
“Leo and I had gotten wedding cake samples from an expensive bakery specializing in wedding cakes.”
“We planned to test them along with Maya after we finished up some other wedding plans yesterday.”
“However, when I came home from work to see Leo yelling at Maya, the box the samples came in wide open on the living room table, and Maya arguing with him.”
“I asked what was happening, and Leo angrily told me that while we were both at work, Maya had some friends over, and they ended up eating almost all of our cake samples.”
“I was shocked and asked Maya why the hell she would do something like that.”
“Maya said that she needed a pick-me-up from what she was going through with her husband and invited her friends over to comfort her, which turned into them eating the cake samples after one of her friends noticed the box on our kitchen counter.”
“My shock turned into anger, and Maya tried to defend herself by saying it was just cake.”
“I told her that if it was just cake, then she should have no problem replacing it.”
“Maya refused because the price was way too expensive for something that tasted sh*tty anyway.”
“Leo backed me up on having Maya pay to replace it, and we argued until I said that if Maya can’t cough up the money, then she’ll just stay at my FMIL’s house because there was no way I was having someone so disrespectful in my house.”
“Maya thought I was bluffing until Leo repeated my sentiment and went to pack her things in a huff.”
“When she came back out, I handed her some cash for gas and told her to get the hell out.”
“Presumably, after Maya got to her mom’s house, my FMIL called me to scold me about kicking Maya out and that I was cruel to do that to her in her time of need.”
“Also, my FMIL was also irritated that I sent Maya her way since she had let Maya into the liquor cabinet and ended up drinking some expensive whiskey that belonged to my FFIL, so now they’re arguing about that.”
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**Hole for kicking her FSIL out of her house.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s FSIL was way out of line by eating the wedding cake samples, and the OP and her fiancé did absolutely the right thing by kicking her out if she was going to take such shocking advantage of their generosity.
“NTA.”
“You did exactly the right thing, and I’m glad to see that your fiancé backed you up.”
“Maya’s parents are (at last) learning that they have raised someone who has no problem stealing, eating, or drinking other people’s stuff without asking.”
“It’s their job to deal with her.”- YourLittleRuth
“NTA.”
“You are not required to house someone who shows you no respect.”
“And I’m loving that fMIL is mad at you when her daughter did the same damn thing to her.”
“‘You are such a brat for sending my daughter here for theft, allowing her to steal from me!'”
“‘Take her back forthwith as punishment for your bad behavior!!'”- selphiekupo
“Maya needs to replace the cakes.”
“You were too generous giving her gas money!”
“As for MIL scolding you over kicking her delightful daughter out, how funny was it that Maya helped herself to her expensive whisky.”
“I bet Maya’s husband is enjoying the peace!”- IamMaggieMoo
“NTA.”
“But Maya is a damn hot mess.”
“She’s got some really bad boundary issues… eating your cake samples, drinking your FFIL’s expensive liquor… it’s like she wants everyone to hate her.”- CaRiSsA504
“NTA.”
“‘Oh no!'”
“‘How dare you kick out my daughter when she is inconsiderate and inconveniences you by taking thing that don’t belong to her?'”
“‘Now she’s at my house doing the same!'”
“‘How dare you make her my problem?!'”
“‘Sounds like MIL is experiencing the effects of her daughter’s behavior.'”
“‘Bummer.'”
“‘May be high time everyone makes figuring out how to care for Maya Maya’s responsibility.'”
“‘Good for you and your fiancé that you have one another’s backs!'”- gurlwithdragontat2
“NTA, and I’m glad FMIL is now finding out why her precious baby keeps getting kicked out by everyone.”- crocodilezebramilk
“NTA.”
“So disrespectful, you were right to boot her out.”- Successful_Bath1200
“NTA.”
“FSIL needs some harsh lessons on being respectful and responsible.’
“Perhaps that’s something FMIL can teach her since she obviously didn’t the first time around.”
“Or maybe they should both sign up for charm school.”- Romance-BookWorm-55
“NTA.”
“A girl needs her mom (and her dad’s booze) during times of trouble, especially relationship trouble; you did everyone a favor!”
“You even gave her gas money. Didn’t anyone thank you?”
“Gee, I hope her parents don’t kick her out. She needs them now!”- proud_didi
“Well, obviously there’s room at enabling mummy’s house, so mummy can put up and shut up.”-PsychologicalBit5422
“You did exactly the right thing. I think we all can realize why she’s having issues at her home if she’s so obviously entitled.”
“MIL is pissed because you’ve dumped her daughter on her. It’s up to mil to kick her out now.”
“NTA, don’t let her back in.”- lovinglifeatmyage
“So she’s going through a hard time. You and your fiance graciously agreed to let her stay a few days to get some space from her husband.”
“What does she do to repay you?”
“Spit in your face with flecks of your wedding cake samples.”
“NTA, she’s their daughter they can take care of her and her bad attitude.”- goshidontknow1395
“You are NTA, obv.”
“She is, obv.”
“For inviting strangers into your home. (she didn’t ask, if that’s okay, I guess?) for eating the cake and then refusing to replace it, because ‘money’.”
“Extra-a.h.-points to FMIL and FFIL who raised their daughter to be an inconsiderate spoiled Brat at 32.”- agnesperditanitt
“Don’t invite Maya to your wedding or when time comes to cut the cake you’ll find it half gone with Maya insisting ‘I just needed a pick-me-up because life’s been so hard for meeeeeee’.”
“NTA.”- AethericOwl
“NTA.”
“Maya is horribly entitled and has bad boundaries.”
“FMIL is now seeing the problem since she got into FFILs booze.”- Emotional_Bonus_934
“NTA.”
“Maya sounds like a real pill.”- riddlerprodigy
“NTA.”
“Don’t let Maya back in to mooch.”
“She lacks common decency.”- Shichimi88
“I would have asked your FMIL cough up the bill for the cake samples her daughter ate!”
“What kind of juvenile behaviour is this?”
“NTA!”- Hyacinth_Bouque
“NTA.”
“In all reality it sounds like the husband sent her away so he could get some space from little miss entitled her.”- th0ughtfull1
“NTA.”
“She’s acting like she’s Goldilocks, going from house to house, consuming what she wants and then saying it’s not good enough.”
“Sure she’s having a hard time, but that doesn’t excuse taking things you know aren’t meant for you.”- offgomi
Tasting the wedding cake samples is one of the few things all brides and grooms look forward to. A moment to savor their relationship and all the delicious cake options!
A thought that didn’t seem to even occur to the OP’s FSIL.
While one does hope she can sort out whatever tension she has going on with her husband, it’s hard not to imagine that her marital strife might have something to do with her only thinking about herself.