Always get everything in writing, especially when it’s a deal between people who know one another.
That is an age-old saying many people tend to ignore.
But others live by it.
Getting all agreements in writing can save reputations.
Because once money is involved, all bets are off.
Case in point…
Redditor Famous_Dust_9970 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback. So naturally, she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
She asked:
“AITA for getting my neighbor and client banned by all the local babysitters after they tried to renege on a deal?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“Over the holidays I (F[emale] 17) got a chance to go to the Caribbean with my neighbors as their nanny.”
“My parents weren’t thrilled but it was after Christmas so they let me go.”
“The deal was pretty simple.”
“It was ten days at an all-inclusive resort.”
“I would share a room with the kids and take care of them for seven days and nights.”
“In return I got $500 and three days to myself.”
“The rooms were adjoining.”
“I think that’s the right word.”
“A door joined them.”
“My parents insisted I get everything in writing so there were no mistakes.”
“Basically we agreed that I would work two days and take one day off. Over and over.”
“No problem I thought and I checked out the included activities and any excursions I might like.”
“On my third day off I had planned to go scuba diving.”
“I got up early and went on my excursion.”
“When I got back the parents were mad that I had left without warning.”
“I reminded them that we had a deal and they said that they had met another couple there and were going golfing and that I screwed up their plans.”
“I don’t know why they made plans on one of my free days.”
“They were upset all the way home.”
“When we got back they posted about how irresponsible I was.”
“One of the other families called me to get my side of the story.”
“I sent them a picture of the deal we agreed on.”
“They said they knew I wouldn’t do what I was being accused of.”
“Then they started commenting on the posts by my neighbors.”
“My parents did this also.”
“But I think everyone thought they were just protecting me.”
“So now it’s a big deal and everyone knows that they tried to change our deal without talking to me.”
“Some of the other babysitters, or their parents, are now saying that they won’t babysit for my neighbors anymore.”
“I feel bad about it because they paid a lot for my vacation.”
“And if they had asked I probably would have switched my excursion to the last day.”
“Anyway, they are upset that I narced, which I didn’t.”
“They said that I could have talked to them if I had a problem.
“But I’m not the one who made it public.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA. You made an agreement IN WRITING which they insisted on.”
“They wanted to renegotiate the terms of your agreement, so it’s down to them to discuss that with you at an appropriate time (not on the day they wanted to switch).”
“Even then you would still have been completely within your rights to decline their request as per the original agreement.”
“You did nothing wrong, you stuck to what was agreed.”
“They then decided to defame you on social media over this.”
“There is literally no other reason for them to make their ‘annoyance’ public other than to shame YOU.”
“Fortunately for you, it backfired on them and now as a consequence of their SECOND mistake they have gotten themselves blacklisted by other sitters.”
“Do not feel bad for them.”
“‘You reap what you sow’ and they certainly have.”
“This is not your responsibility in the slightest.”
“I just hope you got your $500.” ~ Doktor_Seagull
“AND if they were acting this way–in CLEAR violation of the agreement/informal contract they’d signed in regards to OP?”
“EVENTUALLY, they WOULD have found themselves in this exact same position anyway!!!”
“They just hastened the point, by blowing it up in a public sphere so soon.”
“NTA, OP, seriously folks like this do eventually drive away all the options–this just happened to occur on “a slightly expedited timeline!” 😉.” ~ EmmerdoesNOTrepme
“The funniest thing is if the couple had just shut up about it after the trip was over, nothing would have happened.”
“There was a written contract, and if they had reviewed it afterward they would have realized they were wrong, but they didn’t.”
“They held onto this anger for WAYYYYY too long.”
“I mean, they had the rest of that day to be pissed, the rest of their trip, the whole flight home, and then the multiple days/weeks after they returned home.”
“But they just kept holding onto this idea that OP failed the WRITTEN CONTRACT, and they kept pushing.”
“It’s clearly an example of them ‘having to be right,’ instead of just admitting they were wrong.”
“But if they are in a situation to pay for a nanny’s vacation to a tropical spot, I have a feeling they are not told ‘no’ too often.” ~ numbersthen0987431
“I think they expected OP to not enforce her days off and simply work all 10 days.”
“I get that the trip was expensive but what good is an all-inclusive resort if you can’t partake of what the resort is offering?”
“Because you are working 24×7.” ~ One_Ad_704
“Privilege rather than problem-solving.”
“This could’ve gone so many different ways if the parents were chill. so what – they missed a tee time and they can’t get over it.”
“OP is NTA.” ~ CappyHamper999
“One would have to wonder, why did they think this was a good idea?”
“I think I know why.”
“They 100% thought a 17-year-old girl wouldn’t defend herself or know the significance of a written agreement.”
“They thought they could bully OP because they are the adults and would sound more credible than a minor.”
“Had OP not had written proof of them having backed out on their word, a pristine reputation, and kind people who supported her, the wrongful and public slandering of OP may have worked.”
“This was done in malicious intent to mar OP’s reputation and affect her way of making money.” ~ Practical_Chart798
“Think about it.”
“WHY would anybody NEED to go to shame anyone on social media because of golfing?”
“Nobody needs this.”
“Even if the deal hasn’t been in writing, and it has been a misunderstanding, there was NO need for them to shame you publicly because they were a bit disappointed (did they want to have a foursome with the couple, or how come they are that disappointed over golfing??).”
“They screwed you over twice.”
“Thank God karma was on your side.”
“Now, they need to live with the consequences.”
“They will definitely find another babysitter, and hopefully, they have learned to treat the person better by then.”
“And please don’t feel bad about the money.”
“They still had a good holiday, even though you are not their babysitter anymore.”
“And now they might need to take care of their OWN children for a while… It’s nothing to feel guilty about.”
“Think about the billions of people who can’t afford a babysitter.”
“And half of them might even be good people.” ~ Helene1370
“That’s not on you.”
“Good childcare services are precious, and childcare providers pay close attention to how other providers are treated by their employers.”
“It’s an intimate job, and the stakes are high, and no one wants to risk the kind of ugliness that can come from working for a bad employer.”
“A smart parent knows that pissing off a good sitter/nanny/daycare/whatever is going to have repercussions beyond just losing that one provider’s service.”
“If there’s a conflict, it’s good policy to try and resolve it directly (and privately) instead of taking it to the internet.”
‘The second you put it online, you are at the mercy of everyone else’s opinions, and you may not have as many allies as you expected.” ~ DiTrastevere
“That’s their own problem.”
“If I booked a nanny on to a holiday with us I wouldn’t just dump them with the kids for the majority of the vacation.”
“I would literally book them to be a 3rd set of hands, my husband and I being the 1st and 2nd; we’d do activities together and then arrange a couple of evenings to go on a date night where the nanny did bedtime for the kids.”
“And I certainly wouldn’t break the terms of the agreement if I had said the nanny can have a specific number of days off while there.”
‘Don’t feel bad, they f**ked up and now they found out.”
“The oversight of your day off was on them, not you; if an agreement has been made, everyone needs to remember the terms, not just the person getting paid but the people paying too.” ~ Jazzlike-Season-41
“NTA. You and the parents had a deal IN WRITING stating that you would have a set three days off of the time you were there, and like you said, they could have simply asked you to move one of your free days if it was that big a deal.”
“It baffles me how they’re trying to say you’re the bad guy essentially when you never started anything, nor did you make it public originally.”
“Hopefully, the parents come to their senses and realize that it wasn’t that big a deal, and if they’re that rich, they can easily meet with their golf buddies anytime… lol.” ~ MuddyWaters97
“NTA. Seven days of babysitting costs more than $500.”
“Those three days off were the rest of your payment.” ~ No_Lavishness_3206
Well, OP, Reddit is with you.
You followed the agreement.
They could’ve communicated their change in plans.
Sounds like this will be a tricky neighborhood situation.
Which is on them.
Hope you had fun regardless.