We’ve all been in one of those situations where we ordered food at a restaurant and received an incorrect order, whether it was the wrong side of food, a topping we didn’t want, or even the wrong drink.
But we’re all human here, we can understand mistakes can be made from time to time, and we can maturely wait while the order is being corrected, reasoned the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.
While attending a wedding, Redditor Gullible-Nose9502 was shocked when the Best Man threw a fit about receiving a side of potatoes that he did not want.
When he continued to cause a scene, the Original Poster (OP) decided to put a stop to it so he wouldn’t ruin the event.
They asked the sub:
“AITA for taking potatoes off of the Best Man’s plate at a wedding?”
The OP recently attended a good friend’s destination wedding.
“I just got back from my friend’s wedding in Mexico. It was at a fancy, all-inclusive, location.”
“Everyone mostly did their own thing with only a few group events planned, other than the wedding and reception obviously.”
“One of the group activities was dinner out at one of the restaurants that required a reservation. It was beautiful and the service was fantastic.”
The OP was shocked by how the Best Man behaved at the dinner.
“One hiccup. The best man did not want potatoes. He wasn’t allergic, potatoes did not take out his parents in a dark alley, and he hasn’t sworn to avenge them. As far as I know, anyway.”
“I speak Spanish and after he asked me, I asked the waiter to please not serve him potatoes. Well, you know where this is going.”
“He was maliciously served potatoes. And he would not shut up about it. He pointed out to everyone at our table that he had been served a starchy tuber against his will.”
“Other tables were watching him and listening to him getting upset about the potatoes.”
The OP quieted the Best Man in a controversial way.
“He ate the rest of his meal but would not stop talking about the potatoes.”
“I couldn’t take it anymore. I reached over and grabbed the potatoes with my hand and put them on my plate. And then I ate them.”
“He just sat there stunned. Then he got up and went to his suite.”
“He avoided me the rest of the time there, but he made sure to tell everyone what an a**hole I was and how unladylike my behavior was.”
“I just wanted him to shut the f**k up about the potatoes.”
“My friend who got married wants me to apologize for causing drama.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some thought it was really gross and rude to touch someone else’s plate.
“YTA. Wow, you felt entitled to reach over and grab potatoes of his plate with your bare hands and you doubt your total AH status?”
“Firstly, it’s disgusting to touch someone’s plate with your hands. Who wants some random person touching their plate?”
“Secondly, you interjected yourself in something that didn’t concern you at all. He had an issue and he was talking about it. What business is it of yours?”
“Total entitled AH and frankly your food handling practices are gross and unsanitary. Don’t touch other people’s stuff!” – ThrowAwayFoodie22
“You interjected yourself in something that didn’t concern you at all.”
“F**king A, so many Redditors just skip this little detail.”
“The guy was probably really stressed and fixated on an immediate issue. I see it happen at literally every wedding I’ve been to.”
“What OP did was incredibly rude, I don’t get how people can think that OP’s little ‘I’m the main character’ stunt is acceptable.”
“YTA big time.” – Mtwat
“YTA, maybe ESH. Taking food off of someone’s plate with your bare hands is just nasty (well, at least to me). I would’ve got up and walked away, too, if someone grabbed food off of my plate with their hands. However, I would have not sat there and complained.”
“He did have the right to be upset that he got potatoes when he asked not to have them. He could’ve acted like an adult and removed the potatoes himself.”
“A better way would’ve been to remove the potatoes with silverware or ask the waiter for an empty plate and put the potatoes on that. Everyone could’ve handled this more maturely. You both in a way caused the drama. Not sure if this is worth apologizing for.” – Adorable-Glass6478
“The waiter is the AH for serving ‘malicious’ potatoes. They are the catalysts of this situation.”
“The best man is allowed to dislike potatoes (I’m not sure why he has to have a tragic backstory to justify this), but is the AH for going on about it.”
“YTA for adding to the scene by reaching over to his plate. If you see someone acting like a child, your ADULT response should be to ignore it, or calmly de-escalate. Ask yourself, did you truly need to be so theatrical?” – midi09
“YTA. The visual of some stranger grabbing a handful of the mashed potatoes I’m complaining about and eating them bare-handed? Disgusting behavior, it’s not up to you to police what folks are allowed to complain about.”
“Sounds like the only group input is ‘Apologize to him,’ so it’s not like the restaurant or other guests cheered for what you did like some foodie hero.” – Brave_New_Distopia
“YTA. Not sure why you’d think otherwise. You literally reached into his plate and took food out of it.”
“You guys seem perfect for each other, two people who should not be invited to weddings.” – throwwawaymylifee
But others thought the OP was right to do what they could to diffuse the situation.
“YTA. A glorious, wonderful AH that will inspire us all to AH behavior in the years, nay decades to come.”
“Because taking food off someone’s plate is an AH move. But shutting someone up who has been complaining continuously for an hour is a wonderful thing.” – grckalck
“NTA. You’re the hero we didn’t know we needed.”
“But yes, you took away what he really wanted: to play the victim and whine like a child. Once that opportunity was gone, he had no reason to stay so he left.”
“And there was much rejoicing.” – BetweenWeebandOtaku
“NTA. You removed the problem (hilariously). What’s the problem?”
“Oh, he realized how f**king easy it was it to just… remove the potatoes and couldn’t take the embarrassment. Or talking about the potatoes was the only thing he could talk about, and you left him with nothing to talk about.” – fallingintopolkadots
“You said, ‘He made sure to tell everyone what an a-hole I was and how unladylike my behavior was.’ And how would he describe HIS behavior? Gentlemanly?”
“And then you said, ‘My friend wants me to apologize for causing drama.’ This man seems to be truly dedicated to being offended. Apologizing is not going to make things better.”
“NTA, and you sound like an incredibly entertaining person to be friends with.” – Fleegle2212
“NTA. I have a BIL (Brother-in-Law) who had a plus-one added super last minute to a wedding. Like, the bride made arrangements to have this girl come maybe a WEEK before the date.”
“She won’t eat cheese besides a million things. She isn’t allergic. She just won’t touch it. She made such a scene when her appetizer came with cheese on the side.”
“For context, my BIL is vegan, and he just pushed the cheese on the side. But she wouldn’t eat anything if the cheese touched her plate. I felt so bad for the poor waiters who had to deal with her tantrums.”
“It was a big wedding, right at the end of the pandemic, everyone looked so stressed, and she made the waiter come back multiple times to make sure she didn’t have cheese and every other food she didn’t like on her plate.”
“She didn’t deserve to be there, and neither did this person. You did the right thing by calling them out, even if it wasn’t in the most polite way.” – Worried-Horse5317
“NTA. You don’t owe anyone an apology. If anything, he should apologize to the party for being a whiny baby man.”
“Also, extra points for doing something that gets you labeled as ‘unladylike.’ As a fellow unladylike woman, I hope the movement grows and swallows the weak baby men whole.” – Spiritual_Ad_7162
“God forbid not acting like a lady! Don’t you know you’re supposed to cater to that man specifically at all times? (sarcastic comment)”
“NTA. Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong. He can pound sand. Or more potatoes.” – oceanduciel
“NTA. Don’t worry about it; this is small potatoes.” – namesaretoohardforme
The subReddit was so surprised to hear of something throwing such a fit over a plate arriving at the table and the food not being what the person ordered, especially given the fact that this took place at a wedding, and even more so because the offender was the Best Man of the wedding party.
Of course, it’s frustrating to receive an incorrect order, but as long as there are no allergies or food sensitivity involved, this is nothing a short, mature conversation couldn’t fix. The OP never should have had to go to these lengths to quiet the Best Man of all people.
It was clear the Best Man needed a reality check, whether or not this was the best approach.