Getting accepted into a top college choice is a huge accomplishment worthy of praise by a proud parent.
Redditor sunrise_asparagus is a young woman who discovered she got accepted into her “dream school” when she and her mother opened the email together.
But despite the mother’s enthusiasm over the good news, her reaction was not exactly what the young scholar was hoping for.
When the teen got reprimanded for commenting on her mother’s reaction, she
visited the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReedit and asked:
“AITA for getting upset when my mom thanked God instead of me?”
The Original Poster (OP) asked:
“Okay so I am not really religious but my parents are. Last night I was got an email from a college I applied to. It’s my dream school and is really hard to get into.”
“So me and my mom opened the email together and I GOT IN!! (I still can’t believe it).”
“After we realized that I was accepted I like screamed and was like omg or whatever, but my mom went on to ‘thanking the lord’ for my admission and saying things like ‘the lords work is good’, ‘thank you god for getting my daughter into college.'”
“And I guess that’s okay but like i didn’t get an acknowledgement for the work I did, she just thanked god. So I was like ‘I was the one who took the SATs, wrote the essays and studied all these years, you would think I get some credit.'”
“I was instantly called disrespectful and got in trouble she was saying I was disrespecting the religion.”
“So AITA for getting upset when my mom ‘thanked the lord’ for my achievements.”
Strangers on the internet were asked to declare one of the following:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
Most Redditors declared NTA and shared in the OP’s frustration.
“NTA. I hope God has blessed you with a school at least 1000 miles away… /s” – haemaker
“Save it for the graduation. Make sure OP gets all “the Lord’s” help with that debt before the parents works out that they’re not getting the credit. NTA.” – Psychological-Wall-2
“This is what annoys the hell out of me! I worked to earn money, went shopping and cooked the food but it’s god we have to thank? no way!” – rebelwithmouseyhair
“NTA. It would have been one thing if it was just a ‘thank god’ as a generic expression of relief, but she really is over here acting like it was myths rather than your own hard work that got you here. She is undermining your achievement by making it about herself.” – ImpossibleBop
“I had issues in this similar vein. ‘I have been praying for you to pass.’ I basically shut that sh*t down.”
“It is not like God is going to change the answers if I got them wrong. Little late to ask for God to help after I submitted the exam. At that point it is not in God’s hands.”
“If you are going to ask God for help, do it before the exam is created and before I start studying so at least then what I study will coincide with the exam creators.” – MrGelowe
“NTA. I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t take the SATs for you lol.” – Embarrassed_Strain_4
“My sister is a surgeon. There are few things she hates more than the ‘praise the Lord x survived’… She’s like ‘no man… Praise my 12 hours on a simple surgery theyre alive…'”
“Though she does appreciate it when the patient or the family says ‘may the Lord guide your talented hands if things go south’… At least some credit goes to all the time she spent working and studying.”
“(NTA op)” – CrazyChemist987
“I grew up super religious and was OFTEN told that my gifts and accomplishments were not my own, but were the work of god. I’ve been left with a lot of trauma, and still struggle to feel like I’m any good at anything.”
“This is toxic thinking. OP is definitely NTA and should be proud of what she has made happen.” – Bekah_Bear
“NTA it is really important for parents to demonstrate value for their children’s hard work/accomplishments. My mom to this day goes on and on about how I got so lucky to get the scholarships I did for college/how lucky I was to get my internship/how lucky I am that my internship turned into a job.”
“To this day I have a major case of imposture syndrome and feel like I haven’t earned any of the stuff I have accomplished. I have extremely low self worth that I am trying to work through in therapy.”
“OP, even though your mom didn’t say it, you did an amazing job! I can only imagine how much butt you had to kick in order to get accepted into your dream school and I am proud of you!” – Kixkin101
“You were intelligent enough to be eligible for, seek out and apply for the scholarships that made college easier on yourself. You were savvy enough to recognize the value of your internship and positioned yourself to be the best candidate for it.”
“You worked hard to show that you not only wanted to learn at that company, but work to help them thrive as well, and they rewarded your efforts by hiring you to continue to work for them.”
“As a stranger on Reddit, I couldn’t be more proud of you. As a Mama, I can only hope for the same outstanding qualities in my own child.” – StellaLuna108
“NTA. For her to go on and on and steamroll your completely valid points about the work YOU’VE done for this was incredibly dismissive.”
“Anyway, congrats!” – NomNom83WasTaken
“Is she paying your tuition for college?”
“When you graduate, make sure to thank god for funding your education.”
NTA.” – SneakySneakySquirrel
While still declaring NTA, this mom offered a different perspective on the issue.
“NTA I know many Redditors are atheists. I’m not, just for another side of the coin. You DID work your butt off! You ABSOLUTELY deserve respect and recognition for the years of effort and sacrifice.”
“On the other hand, I would bet that your Mom, if she is a believer, and not just religious for show, has prayed her butt off for years, too.”
“Her thanking God was just a thanks for answered prayer, from what you shared. She can recognize and respect your accomplishments while still recognizing and appreciating the provision of the Lord. Doesn’t sound like she praised your part at all. I would feel really hurt, too.”
“I would offer, there is a TON of scripture on this in Proverbs, if she is of a religion that uses the Bible. I’m not sure about other faiths and will not presume to speak on those.”
“If you are really hurt, maybe a conversation about that part of her faith will help her see that God will give much help, but laziness and poor choices are not His thing. You are responsible for that part.”
“I’m not saying you are a believer. I’m not here to debate or lecture on that. Nobody asked me that. I’m only commenting of a possible way to help Mom see your effort as necessary and good AND praiseworthy.”
“BTW, Congrats!! Don’t let this bring you down! Mom is definitely in your corner. We Moms don’t always get it right. ;)”
Overall, the OP ended up getting validation from kind strangers who credited her for the hard work she put in that resulted in her college acceptance.