It’s easy to get jealous of people who have parents who are willing to help them financially and who, as a result, pretty much never have to worry about money.
If these friends acknowledge their lucky situation, however, and otherwise don’t seem to be taking advantage of their parent’s kindness, then it’s hard to find anything terribly wrong with these situations.
Making it more difficult not to judge, however, is when these people make it seem that they worked hard to get where they are, and completely falsify their situation.
Redditor Sadhouse27 was somewhat surprised when a friend of hers publicly called her out for not being one hundred percent clear about part of her life.
As a result, the original poster (OP) couldn’t help but do the same to her friend, which her friend did not appreciate one bit.
Wondering if they possibly went too far, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for telling my friend her parents bought her house, not her?”
The OP explained how after a friend shared information about her life which she did not appreciate, she felt inclined to do the same thing about her friend.
“I (28 F[emale]) have a friend (28 F) who purchased a house late last year.”
“It’s an awesome 2 story town house and I’ve been over there plenty of times to help out with moving/decorating and for hanging out.”
“As mentioned in the title, her parents purchased the house for her and her partner.”
“I truly have no issue with this as the housing market is terrible for buyers so more power to them for being home owners.”
“I recently, unfortunately inherited my parents house, which is 3 bedroom, out in the sticks.”
“We went appliance shopping because most of the the stuff in the house was 10-15 years old.”
“We were standing with an employee who I had asked to recommend some smaller items like toasters and kettles when the employee asked if I was moving out as general chit chat.”
“I told him I was moving, and he asked whether I bought or rented.”
“I told him bought, because it was just easier and less awkward than telling him I inherited the house.”
“He told me that was cool and began talking about the toasters again when my friend cut in that I had inherited my house, not purchased it.”
“The employee went quiet and I gave her a ‘what was that’ face.”
“I was taken aback, she continued on saying ‘yeah, I purchased my house’.”
“I asked ‘does it really matter?'”
“‘I’m here to buy some kitchen appliances not tell this guy my personal issues’.”
“She grinned and said ‘it’s just for the record’ which made me more confused and annoyed.”
“I replied ‘oh okay then if it’s just for the record your parents purchased your house for you’.”
“The employee quickly retreated and she walked outside of the shop.”
“I caught up with her and she said I was a massive a**hole for pointing out she couldn’t afford to own without her parents help.”
“I returned with a very similar ‘my parents also helped me with getting a house too, just in a really terrible way’.”
“My partner agrees with me, saying that she’s the one that opened that door, but our other friends are split almost 50/50.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for pointing out that her friend did not purchase her home all on her own.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s friend opened the gate to make snide remarks, and shouldn’t have made the remarks about the OP if she couldn’t take them herself.
“NTA.”
“She doesn’t get to be catty and look down on you for how you each got your homes.”
“It seems like an odd disconnect that she feels superior about it at all.”- Vox_Popsicle
“NTA.”
“Your friend definitely is.”
“The employee probably just wanted to know if you rent your house or own it but the way he worded the question totally merited the ‘I bought it’ answer.”
“You didn’t want to get more personal than that, but your friend decided to start playing games.”
“Is she normally competitive with you?”
“Because that’s what it sounds like.”
“This whole thing is just weird and uncomfortable.”
“I am sorry about the circumstances for your home ownership.”- leahs84
“NTA.”
“Holy crap, what would possess anyone to say this then grin?”
“I would argue that any person that revels in pointing out your deep personal loss to one up you to a total stranger is not your friend.”- Embarrassed-Storm-25
“NTA.”
“Your friend started the ‘let’s tell the truth’ game, not your fault if you played along.”- gumbuoy
“NTA.”
“What a gross thing to say.”
“Why do people have such an issue with others inheriting?”
“Their parents died FFS.”
“You were so within your rights to snap back like that and I’m glad you did.”- 4614065
“I am sorry for your loss, OP.”
“I would say NTA because, frankly speaking, it does not matter in that situation how you got a home.”
“An employee just tried to have a polite conversation and you answered in a way that is less awkward.”
“Your friend didn’t have to pull that.”- No-Jellyfish-1208
“NTA.”
“She started with the weird petty correction nobody asked for, the salesperson probably wanted to know just in case you have a landlord to deal with.”- chucker23n
“NTA.”
“How on earth are your friends split 50/50 on this?”
“What is their logic?”
“She was being all smug and gloating about the house you just inherited after a tragic loss!”
“Who does that?”
“And then she wants to play the victim?”
“This woman is not your friend and anyone who can’t see that she’s the AH is just being weird.”-lkbird8
“NTA.”
“She’s the one who butted in totally with information totally unnecessary to the transaction at hand.”
“If what she said was a truth that needed to be told, then what you said was also a truth that needed to be told.”- Weskit
“NTA.”
“WTF was she trying to accomplish by saying that?”
“What a nasty thing to do.”- Swegh_
“NTA.”
“Your friend went out of her way to be an a**hole.”
“You were right to put her in her place.”
“She felt the need to tell a total stranger that you did not buy your house and it was inherited, such behavior is toxic beyond words, you need to seriously rethink your friendship.”- Speedypanda4
“NTA.”
“OP I’m sorry for the circumstances that led to you inheriting your home.”
“But your friend opened herself up to that response when she felt the need to nitpick the fine details.”
“You own a home, so does she.”
“If she had left it at that so would you.”- MajesticAdvantage119
“NTA.”
“Is your friend really your friend?”
“She doesn’t sound like it; she sounds mean, smug, self-satisfied and completely oblivious to the fact that your parents died.”- Purrsay
“NTA.”
“Our parents bought my brother his first house.”
“I inherited their house a few years later.”
“There is no question which of us got the ‘better deal’.”
“The friend was given a house by her living parents.”
“They can visit, join her for dinner, celebrate holidays, etc.”
“OP has none of that and never will.”
“The friend started it, OP finished it.”
“OP, you need a better friend.”- ACCER1
“Why was she acting d*ckish when you were avoiding talking about losing your parents?”
“Sounds like a poor friend.”- Smooth_Fee
“The way I see it, you were gifted a house that your parents lived in, and she was gifted a house that her parents didn’t live in.”
“There’s not much difference.”
“NTA, but your ‘friend’ is and personally I’d be reevaluating this ‘friendship’.”
“Friends don’t try to one up each other, score points, or put you down.”
“You deserve better than this.”
“If anyone spoke to me like that, it would definitely be the last time I ever went shopping with them.”
“What’s so great about this upity b*tch, that she’s worth the abuse?”
“Like others have said, she was just rude, and it was completely unsolicited.”- Terran_Jedi
“NTA.”
“If she didn’t want you blasting her business to the salesperson she shouldn’t have blasted yours and then lied about her own situation.”-Alicia0510
“Your friend needs their parents to get them some manners next.”- Vegetable_Salad86
“NTA.”
“She started it and you finished it.”
“Sounds like she wanted to drag you down/ make her look superior in front of a stranger whilst forgetting her own ‘house origins’.”
“The difference being you inherited under sad circumstances and she was privileged to have her parents buy her house.”
“It also sounds like she needed the reality check.”- Status-Pattern7539
It’s hard to imagine that the motives of the OP’s friend were anything other than malicious when she told the store employee she inherited her house.
Nor can one really argue that she practically invited the OP to share that her parents bought her her house by saying “just for the record”.
Perhaps the strain on their friendship will go away after a conversation or two.
And hopefully the OP’s friend will think before speaking going forward.