Privacy.
The term gets thrown around a lot and used for a multitude of things that have nothing to do with what it actually means.
Privacy is defined by Merriam-Webster dictionary as “Freedom from unauthorized intrusion.”
The key word there is ‘unauthorized.’
My doctor can see my medical records, and my brother cannot.
Really, it’s about consent.
So, what happens when you let slip that a friend is using their position of power to violate the privacy of others and that friend ends up reaping the consequences?
That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) 29infinity when they came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.
They asked:
“AITA for getting my wife’s friend fired from her job”
An introduction.
“My wife (26) and I (27) have a friend (let’s call her Nancy, 26) who works for an airline company in the US.”
“She works within the company and has access to flight records and personal information.”
Then, right to the situation at hand.
“My wife and I were hanging out with Nancy a couple of weeks ago, and she kept causally bragging about how she had been searching up celebrities and had found out emails, phone numbers, multiple addresses, and other person details.”
“Nancy claims to have found information on over 20+ celebrities, including some huge names.”
“My wife and I both mentioned that it probably wasn’t a good idea, and if she got caught, she’d likely be in some big trouble.”
“A few days after, I was hanging out with another friend (let’s call him Tony, 27) who also works for the same airline company but in a different sector.”
“I had mentioned what Nancy had been doing, and he agreed that it was a bad idea and she would end up in pretty serious trouble for looking up such information.”
Whoops.
“This Friday, I received an angry phone call from Nancy, who was yelling about how I had told her boss what she was doing and she had been fired for looking up personal celebrity information.”
“I explained that I had mentioned it to another friend but didn’t think he would tell anyone.”
“It turns out Tony had mentioned it to his girlfriend, who ended up telling her best friend who works above Nancy in the company.”
“This lead to Nancy’s boss finding out, and consequently firing her.”
“Tony’s girlfriend found out that Nancy had searched over 100 celebrities and had access information including family contact info and address.”
“My wife is split and says I shouldn’t have spoken about it but also agrees that what Nancy was doing was pretty creepy, and this was a consequence of her bragging.”
OP was left to wonder,
“Am I the a**hole?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA”
“‘She kept causally bragging'”
“She didn’t get fired because she was looking that sh*t up.”
“She got fired because she couldn’t stop letting people know she did.” ~ StAlvis
“Yep, running her mouth…” ~ SufficientRemote3349
“NTA. She should have known better, I’m sure it was in her training but it should also be common friggin sense.”
“NTA OP. To be fair, someone else would have probably found out anyway because of her bragging. What an a-hole she is” ~ LaylaBird65
‘”To be fair someone else would have probably found out anyway because of her bragging.”‘
“Well that, and I also wouldn’t be surprised if the airline company did IT sweeps to make sure employees like OPs wife’s friend aren’t doing this kind of thing.”
“Either way she was going to get caught eventually. It was a case of when she’d get caught.”
“Her bragging to impress people just got her caught quicker.” ~ danigirl3694
Legal issues.
“I mean, there’s a high chance what she was doing was absolutely illegal, if she wasn’t looking through that information for work purposes it seems to pretty specifically be an invasion of privacy.” ~ TheArcReactor
“I was waiting for this.”
“I work in healthcare as well and a couple of people in my company have been fired over the last few years for looking up patient information that they shouldn’t have been.”
“In one case it was their family member’s information, but we’re not allowed to even look up our own details technically so…..”
“And in both cases a company-wide email was sent around informing everyone, again, of the confidentiality agreement we all signed when we started at our company.”
“And how patient details, not just names/DOBs etc but test results as well, are confidential for a reason.”
“And if patients and the doctors that help keep us in business can’t trust us to keep our mouths shut about what we see in the course of our work, then we’ll very soon find ourselves out of a job ~ Fluffbrained-cat
“NTA.”
“Whether you exposed her deliberately or by accident, what she was doing was unethical, against company policy and perhaps an invasion of privacy.”
“If she blabs about it then that’s exactly the way rumors start and she should have expected that to happen.” ~ dwotw
“Let’s see:”
“Data Protection Privacy Laws – CHECK”
“Improper use of company equipment – CHECK”
“Accessing confidential information – CHECK”
“Lack of Integrity – CHECK”
“An employee at my company was doing almost the same thing but worse. He used company files and customer information to call our top clients to promote his side business.”
“One complaint, a print out of files he accessed, and detailed phone logs later. He was terminated without question.” ~ Muttley-Snickering
Ownership and Consequences
“NTA and good job, you exposed a glorified stalker.”
“Even though you didn’t do it intentionally, N either knew or should have known the consequences of talking about something like that, and she’s choosing to take it out on you instead of holding herself accountable.”
“She’s lucky the airline didn’t get sued, and if she wrote down or otherwise kept any of the contact information somehow, she’s heading for an eventual lawsuit herself.” ~ author124
“NTA -“
“You didn’t get her fired, she got herself fired.”
“I feel like that is an important thing to point out.”
“I’m sure you’re not the only one she bragged about to and it would’ve gotten back to her boss eventually.”
“Unprofessional and a breach of privacy, not cool.” ~ sunnydays0306
“Actions have consequences. She got herself fired. She needs to blame herself” ~ deepu777
“NTA that is so wrong on so many levels what she did.”
“You never know what she would end up doing with the information or giving it out.”
“It is an extreme offense, and actions have consequences.”
“She knew what she was doing when she looked it up I work for a film union and have worked with many different celebrities; we have to sign NDA’s all the time, and some information comes with the territory.”
“Her job put this trusted information into their system, and they hire who they think are.”
“I’m assuming reliable trusted people.”
“Honestly, for this information, she can and almost should go to jail. It’s a complete invasion of privacy which celebrities don’t get a lot of as it is.” ~ bubbleburst1994
Isn’t it ironic?
“NTA”
“Oh the irony, she wants what she told you to stay private even though she violated the privacy of so many others. She f*cked around and found out.” ~ Laines_Ecossaises
The vote was hardly unanimous.
“Info needed:”
“Did she ask you to keep it quiet and told you in confidence?”
“If so YTA.”
“If she just brought it up in conversation and didn’t mention anything about keeping it quiet then not as much.”
“But regardless it seems like you knew it could get her in trouble and if this is really a friend why would you do that?”
“Why not keep it quiet?” ~ lakeviewdude74
“YTA, she didn’t actually do anything with the info, so no harm was done, but you got her fired (unintentionally, which makes it worse, IMHO) I think you’re the arsehole” ~ waynejayes
“Ok. She shouldn’t be doing what she’s doing, it’s illegal.”
“BUT did she show you in confidence? Cause if she did, then YTA.”
“BUT if she bragged about it in a way where she seems she doesn’t care, then NTA.”
“In a way, she’s lucky she’s only just fired. In certain fields, thats a criminal offence.” ~ dirtyoldfart76
Safety concerns.
“Not just an invasion of privacy, but also a safety issue, for the clients. What would happen if this information got into the wrong hands, an obsessed fan.”
“The airline could be held liable.” ~ MurphyCaper
“You’re NTA regardless, but this is where it really got to me:”
‘”Tony’s girlfriend found out that Nancy had searched over 100 celebrities, and had access information including family contact info and address.”‘
“Holy f*cking sh*t!”
“Accessing personal information like that through your place of employment is bad enough— saving that info for personal use could possibly get you sued!”
“Nancy should count herself lucky she only lost her job!”
“It isn’t even their celebrity status that worries me— it’s the threat to general personal safety!”
“If any employee can look up someone’s address, contact info, or other stuff, then that doesn’t bode well for a single person who uses that airline!”
“Flyers should NOT have to worry about unhinged a**holes (like Nancy) stalking us. You did the right thing, OP!” ~ DoodlingDaughter
There wasn’t a whole lot of wiggle room on this one.
OP’s friend violated more than just decorum when she peeked at personal profiles without permission. She violated trust and corporate policy, and a few privacy laws.
More importantly, she violated the consent of those who had shared that data to begin with.
Celebrity or not, privacy is the right of all sentient beings.
No, I’m not apologizing for the Transformers reference.