Baby monitors are convenient for parents who can’t always be by their child’s side in the nursery.
Now imagine that baby is an adult. There’s nothing wrong with mommy still keeping tabs on her grown-up child in the bedroom, right?
Redditor burritos2123—an adult male—had an uneasy feeling he was being watched. And when his instincts were confirmed, he was rightfully upset about the violation of his privacy.
So the Original Poster (OP) visited the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit to ask:
“AITA for suing my mother after i found out she has cameras in my home.”
Despite accusations of the post being fake because his ‘writing skills are bad’ the OP confirmed otherwise in an update.
The OP recalled the moment he realized he and his wife were being spied on.
“So I (24 m[ale]) and my (24 f[emale]) wife where sleeping in our bed. Now our bed faces a vent.”
“So i woke up and i saw that something was in there. And i have never noticed, but my mom had put a CAMERA in that vent my mother is a narcissist i went [no contact] with her when i hit 18.”
“And when i saw that camera i thought ‘holy sh*t there’s a pervert who likes to watch me and my wife sleep.'”
“Then i found all of the cameras and bugs my mother put. Oh and how she got in was she contacted my dad who i still talk to and lied to him and told him to give her a key to my house to ‘go feed and take care of my dog’ because ‘I was away’ but i was just at work.”
Knowing who was behind operation Big Brother didn’t stop the OP from taking legal action.
“Anyways i took the cameras and bugs to the police station they found out it was my mom and i pressed charges.”
“So i want to know, am i the a** for doing so?”
Anonymous strangers on the internet were asked if and where guilt belongs by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
Redditors were generally disturbed and sided with the OP.
“NTA. Omg camera in the room facing the bed? As in recording you guys being intimate?”
“I hope that’s as illegal as it sounds. That’s so wrong and disgusting. Damn right you should sue her or have her prosecuted!”
“It makes my skin crawl to even imagine, I can’t imagine how you must be feeling. Good luck.” – whynousernamelef
“This is the most horrifying and egregious violation of privacy I can possibly imagine.”
“It would traumatize me. NTA and good for you for doing what needs done.” – pammy_poovey
“At first I was thinking you were a kid and you just found out there were cameras in the house. Bad enough.”
“But when I read it was YOUR house with YOUR wife, I was like WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL. Press charges immediately.” – Nykki72
This incredulous Redditor had to take a moment to let the story sink in but still remained speechless and confused.
“I still haven’t really processed the post because the idea of anyone aiming a camera at their adult children’s bed (especially knowing they’re married and knowing they’re probably intimate) is just insane to me.”
“Beyond the legal and moral issues, which there are a ton of, who the f’k wants to see their kid f’king their spouse?!?
“?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!” – jollycuppa
This Redditor attempted to give a logical explanation behind the mother’s intentions and claimed that these parental practices are not entirely uncommon.
“Narcissistic parents, when severe, tend to be extremely controlling and manipulative with a complete lack of grounded-logic.”
“If this story is true I’d guess the mother wants to a) feel in control of her son by knowing things about his life even though he’s gone no-contact, and/or b) wants to dig up dirt to split up his marriage and get her son back as she likely places the blame of their no-contact relationship on a third party, such as op’s wife.”
“These things happen, so the idea of the post isn’t outside the realm of possibility – parents placing tracking software in phones or in vehicles is very common.”
“As is socially engineering their way into their lives – such as the lie to the father to get the keys.”
“But the post is so poorly written, lacking in specificity, and conflates criminal charges with civil suits, making it hard to take seriously.” – Philinspector
This Redditor listed the reasons explaining why the mother’s action was illegal.
“Yes for multiple reasons:”
“bedrooms have an expectation of privacy. You can’t put any type of recording device in there without the occupants consent, even if you are a parent who wants to put a camera in your kid’s room in your own house. Regardless of your state’s recording laws.”
“It ain’t her house. She had to have the homeowner’s permission. Even if it was her child. ‘He’s my child I can do whatever I want in regards to him!’ doesn’t work as a defense.”
“Not only that but to place audio recording devices she had to have the homeowner’s permission because even in a one-party consent state the laws all have similar wording and contain this gem ‘one party to the conversation must have knowledge that a recording is taking place.'”
“If you aren’t a party to the conversation you can’t record it unless you have consent from one party, if the conversation is taking place in an area where it would be safe to assume the conversation is private.” – naranghim
Just because she’s the OP’s mother doesn’t mean she automatically gets a free pass.
“would you SERIOUSLY be asking this question if the person who had violated you in this way was not genetically linked to you?”
“if somebody wrote here ‘i used to have a good friend in high school but we went no contact after i took issues with her behavior, but i recently found out that she broke into my home and put bugs and cameras there, would i be an a**hole if I took issue with this?'”
“would you even for a second deliberate the answer? this is repulsive. this is criminal. family is not an excuse. NTA” – GoldenesDachl
And for the record, Redditors believed dad wasn’t exactly innocent in the situation either.
“Take the keys away from your dad as well.” – nannab247
“And have a VERY stern talking to with your father, as well! He’s enabled all of this.”
“I’d actually consider straight up cutting contact with him as well, this is so egregious.”
“NTA, btw. Sue her and have your wife sue her as well. Hope she gets the metaphorical book thrown at her.” – GenderGambler
This family’s home movies are one for the books.