Try as they might, there is no one who gets along with everyone they know.
Some people get on our nerves a little more than others.
Even so, finding people challenging shouldn't affect our ability to be nice to them.
Barring some truly extraordinary circumstances.
Redditor ne0neptune had a colleague who seemed like an outcast in her office.
It wasn't long before this colleague got on the nerves of the original poster (OP) as well.
Namely, owing to his constant gloating about a hobby the OP introduced him to.
The OP found herself unable to keep her mouth shut, however, when this colleague shifted from gloating to making personal remarks about the OP.
Having some doubts about how she handled things, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**Hole" (AITAH).
Unlike the similar 'Am I The A**Hole' (AITA) subReddit, AITAH allows Redditors to ask for advice on issues that are not permitted on AITA, such as asking for advice or posting about ending relationships. Voting acronyms aren't required, and no final judgment is declared.
The OP asked fellow Redditors:
"AITAH For Telling My Coworker No One Cares About His Workout Routine?"
The OP explained why they felt compelled to put her colleague in his place:
"I (21 F[emale]) work in a small company with only a few coworkers."
"One of them, let's call him Joe (27 M[ale]), is the owner's son and has always had issues."
"He can't keep a job down besides in his parents' company, and he is an all-around miserable person."
"I gave him a lot of chances because I felt bad for him."
"Last summer, I decided to get a gym membership and thought I could invite him to join me since we leave work at the same time."
"I know I like to have motivation, so I was just trying to help him out."
"We stayed on a steady routine for a few months, and then he flaked out on me until he just stopped going."
"I stayed consistent and eventually stopped going to the big gym since I had switched to a new apartment complex. I have been using their gym instead, so I decided to end my membership in February of this year."
"Fast forward to August of 2026, he has begun to go back to the gym, and it has consumed his life."
"'Hey Joe, how was your day'."
"'All I can think about it going to the gym after work'."
"'Hey Joe, can you grab me that box from the top shelf'."
"'Ah man, don't make me reach for it. I am wayyyy to sore since I worked out in the gym'."
"'Hey Joe, I got a new dog'."
"'I have to lift more weights so I can lift that dog up'."
"'These little comments just got under my skin because I didn't care about what he did or why he was sore'."
"'I think it would bother me if anyone was gloating like this, especially since well....he doesn't exactly look like he's going to the gym either'."
"I held my tongue and just put up with his constant need for praise and attention."
"I wasn't going to tell a grown man good job for walking on a treadmill for twenty minutes."
"He does not lift weights or do any strenuous cardio."
"Even if he did, he doesn't need to bother me with all the details."
"Today, I go out to eat for lunch and brought food back."
"I came back from my lunch break and Joe commented that the air smelled like fries."
"I just ignored him and continued walking, to which he said, 'You know, if you didn't eat like that, you'd be a lot healthier. That's why I have been going to the gym, you shouldn't have cancelled your membership'."
"Finally, I snapped."
"I told him that no one cares that he went to the gym every day, and if he was really happy with himself, he would just focus on his own body."
"He told me I was being sensitive and not everything has to be a big deal."
"I told him that I have been going to the gym for months and just because I eat out once doesn't erase my hard work."
"I don't tell everyone about my gym habits because...my coworkers don't care I was in the gym for an hour last night lol!"
"Maybe I was sensitive to his comment about my eating habits, but I honestly am just fed up with his constant need for praise over something that most humans do without batting an eye (exercise)."
"AITAH for snapping at him?"
Fellow Redditors weighed in, with some using the voting acronyms:
- NTA - Not The A**hole
- YTA - You're The A**hole
- NAH - No A**holes Here
- ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community was generally in agreement that the OP had every right to clap back at Joe.
Everyone agreed that if Joe had only been talking about himself, it would be one thing. But once he started making personal remarks about the OP's body, someone needed to put him in his place, even if some questioned how good an idea it was to talk that way to their boss's son:
"NTA."
"Once he brought up your personal habits, it became inappropriate."- Quiet-Hamster6509
"NTA, why is a man commenting on your health?"
"He sounds annoying."- kombuchakowgirl
"NTA."
"He went from talking about his own workout to commenting on your body and eating habits."
"That's where he crossed the line."- OfficialBroccoliRob
"NTA….the insult he threw at you totally justified your response."- No-Firefighter-7442
“'I’d think you would have more results for how often you go to the gym'.”- ChartPuzzleheaded747
"NTA."
"Really isn’t his place to comment on bodies or eating habits."- female-trb72
"NTA."
"Why is he commenting on what someone else eats?"
"Or on their health?"
"It’s rude."
"He sounds like a brat."- rwindsor7
"NTA."
"People like him are exhausting."- sherbetx
"NTA."
"The audacity of THIS guy commenting on your body and health when he was the one who flaked on gym plans with you."
"He really crossed the line there."
"Also, he’s clearly miserable, and you have tried your best but now you’ve been pushed to your limits."- wherearetheavocados6
"I don't know if OP is TAH, but not smart to piss off the owner's son for something, not threats, sexism, racism, but talking too much about health and workouts when OP is the one who invited them to begin with?!"- epeeist42
"NTA."
"If you can't enjoy eating what you want every now and again, life would be a lot more miserable."
"He sounds miserable and wants everyone to be as miserable as he is."- MistressJacklynHyde
"NTA."
"But is Joe actually neurotypical?"
"There might be a cognitive issue."
" I have a relative on the autism spectrum who would latch onto a topic, and that's all they talked about."
"Their parents worked really hard with them, and they're much improved."
"Totally not okay to comment on your personal choices."
"How kind of you to have invited him to the gym in the first place."- DependentReaction896
"I think YTA."
"You say you gave him lots of chances because you felt bad for him."
"I’m interpreting these chances as just friendly conversations."
"So maybe he thought you were work friends since you two have conversations."
"You are the one who introduced him to going to the gym."
"You were both going to the same gym after work, so you had that in common."
"You tell him about at least some things in your life; for instance, that you got a dog."
"You ask him to do things for you in the office; asking him to get things down from a high shelf for you."
"He probably talks to you about working out all the time because you have that in common, he wants you to see he is at least keeping up what you introduced him to, and he probably doesn’t have much else going on in his life."
"You are the one who kept letting him talk about working out until suddenly it was the last straw."
"Maybe communicate with him and others before you get so angry you yell at him/them."
"If you don’t like him, stop interacting with him."
"In the workplace, you need to be professional and respectful."
"Especially if he is owner’s son."
"That will blow back on you, not him."
"Maybe you could apologize for blowing up at him if you haven’t already?"
"You don’t want that at work."
"Hang in there, you are in a tough situation, but you will be ok."- jaynor88
"The best strategy would be to talk over him and completely ignore his comments."
"NTA, though."
"Nothing wrong with the truth."- DynkoFromTheNorth
Putting someone's hobbies or passions down for no reason is simply unkind.
Equally unkind, however, is using your hobbies and passions to make demeaning remarks about someone else.
Joe should consider himself lucky that the OP didn't sink to his level.
