When hosting a dinner party, making it potluck style is a very efficient decision as to how to decide what to serve.
Saving the host the trouble of doing all the cooking and cleaning, and allowing everyone to contribute to the meal.
Of course, there is always the unfortunate possibility that not all dishes will be as popular as others, resulting in some guests taking home a virtually, or entirely, untouched dish.
Redditor PotluckThrowaway3 and his friends would often get together at potluck parties.
Sadly, their most recent gathering proved to be a less than joyous occasion, after the original poster (OP) discovered that not only did a new member of the group ignore the rules when it came to dishes, but the dish they brought turned out to be contaminated.
Resulting in the OP taking matters into his own hands, and causing something of a scene.
Having second thoughts about how he handled the situation, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for throwing away a full dish at a potluck because of dog hair.”
The OP explained how a recent potluck all went sour owing to mashed potatoes.
“My (28 M[ale]) friends and I have potluck parties every so often.”
“One of our rules at this is it has to be store or restaurant bought.”
“We had a food poisoning incident and so we just said no home made dishes.”
“Everyone has been cool with it.”
“At our most recent one, a friend invited someone that I had never met before.”
“She (20’s F[emale]) brought her own home made dish.”
“I guess it was communicated that it was a potluck, but not the rule.”
“Whatever, first time, we left the dish out.”
“She brought mashed potatoes.”
“I took a serving.”
“Noticed some dark spots.”
“I just thought it was pepper.”
“I felt something weird in my mouth and fished it out.”
“It was an animal hair.”
“Played around with it and found a few more.”
“I was absolutely revolted and threw away the dish.”
“I didn’t care that it was mostly full and people were in line for food.”
“I immediately get yelled at for throwing it away.”
“I tell her that dish has animal hair in it, it’s disgusting.”
“I ask her if she is trying to make us all sick?”
“She starts crying, calls me an a**hole and just leaves the party.”
“I found out she has 4 dogs, if I knew that I would have never gotten a scoop of potatoes.”
“It was pretty mixed on how I handled it.”
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
While the Reddit community was somewhat divided, they ultimately believed no one came out of this party looking particularly good.
Most people believed that the OP was justified in throwing out the potatoes, as no one should eat potatoes full of dog hair, but still could have been more polite and diplomatic in how he handled it.
“ESH.”
“Yes the dish needed to be thrown away but you could have handled it better.”
“Nobody wants that sort of public humiliation and it could have been a side conversation instead of something so dramatic.”- Eastern_Alps572
“I cannot imagine anything worse than a potluck where everything is store bought hahahahaha.”
“ESH.”
“OP doesn’t suck for throwing it out or hosting the worst potlucks ever, but for overreacting like an A and treating the person who did it like it wasn’t an accident, asking if she was trying to make them sick etc.”
“This was gross and needed to go but no one was likely to get sick.”- OLAZ3000
“ESH.”
“Her dish was disgusting, but you handled the situation in the most undiplomatic way ever.”
“And a potlatch with no home cooked dishes sounds terrible.”- stiletto929
“ESH.”
“To avoid a scene, you could have pulled her aside and tell her the situation and let her know you won’t be serving the dish.”- lovely_aria_ann
“ESH.”
“Multiple animal hairs in a dish is disgusting, and I would have tossed it too.”
“Having 4 dogs doesn’t mean it’s ok for there to be dog hair in food brought for other people.”
“But you were rude about it.”- mutualbuttsqueezin
“ESH.”
“You for publicly embarrassing her when you could have quietly pulled her aside to let her know after you pull her dish off the table.”
“Her for bringing in a dish that was unsanitary.”
“Your friend group for having store bought only potlucks rather than just educating yourselves on food safety.”- WhollyDisgusting
“ESH.”
“Her for not cooking in a clean environment and you for how you reacted.”
“Best thing to do would be to have a word with her on the side instead of making it a public display.”
“You completely lost the plot.”- slap-a-frap
“ESH.”
“Yeah, the dish had problems.”
“And maybe you had to throw it out.”
“But the rest of what you did and said was ridiculous.”- hamhead
Others, however, completely sided with the OP, agreeing that bringing over a dish full of dog hairs was unacceptable and should not be tolerated.
“NTA.”
“You found more than 1 dog hair in a scoop of mash and immediately threw the dish away even though people are queuing for it.”
“If I’m your friends I’ll be thanking you profusely for saving me from eating dog hair mash.”
“Eww.”
“I don’t really see what else can op do?”
“It is disgusting and people might get sick from eating food that is contaminated – it has dog hair in it, what else can be inside?!”
“Having 4 dogs doesn’t give you the right to feed people your dogs hair.”
“I’m still grossed out.”- Crazy_Past6259
“I’ll let a single pet hair slide.”
“‘Some dark spots’ ‘found a few more’, is hell no thank you very much.”- shammy_dammy
“NTA what the f*ck?”
“That’s disgusting.”- IWouldButImLazy
“NTA.”
“I have 4 cats and would be f*cking mortified if someone found fur!”- No-Locksmith-8590
“NTA.”
“Bro she needs to do some serious dusting if there is that much dog hair in there.”- IndigoGlass64
“I would throw it out of it had human hair in it let alone dog hair.”
“Hair in food is disgusting.”
“NTA.”- nochoicetochoose
While a few felt that the OP’s behavior was not only way out of line, but the idea of a potluck with exclusively store-bought or restaurant-made dishes was ridiculous to begin with.
“YTA.”
“You could have removed the dish from the table and taken her aside, shown her the dog hairs and not caused a scene.”
“Yes, it’s revolting but public humiliation isn’t called for in this case.”- ToastMmmmmmm
“YTA for yelling at her and causing a scene.”
“Also YTA because wtf kinda potluck only allows store bought dishes??”
“Where I come from, you show up to a potluck with a store bought dish, you ain’t gettin’ invited back to no more potlucks, ya’hear?”
“Most people take reasonable precautions with food safety.”
“Just because ONE person ONE time made a mistake is no reason to stop having normal potlucks.”- Abba_Zaba_
“Miss Manners would suggest you remove the dish from the table and pull the cook aside and quietly explain the problem with the dish.”
“Wrap the dish up for her to take back home with her and not throw it out.”
“You don’t have the right to throw it out (as odd as that sounds).”
“People aren’t going to die or get sick even though I find it gross, you find it gross, everyone finds it gross.”
“By loudly announcing everything and making a scene you put your guests in an even more awkward position.”
“Just simply saying to your guests ‘we are pulling the mashed potatoes’ or ‘the mashed potatoes will no longer be served’ should suffice.”- Notonmybingocard2022
“YTA.”
“She was correct to call you an AH.”
“What sort of sentence is that to utter?”
“You’re not wrong for taking an action, but this was a sh*tty AH action to take.”
“‘Hmmm… new person in the group, time for some public humiliation.”- Mr_Ham_Man80
“Seriously, you could have handled it much better instead of embarrassing her.”- whogivesashite2
“YTA.”
“Not for throwing the dish out, but for making her cry?”
“Like?”
“’Are you trying to make us all sick?’”
“That’s so rude wtf.”- spicyychorizoo
“YTA.”
“Not for throwing the dish out, but for being over-the-top dramatic about it.”
“’Are you trying to make us all sick?!!’”
“Really, dude, I highly doubt she planned on coming to the party to feed everyone dog hair-laced taters.”
“You could have grabbed the pot, then pulled her aside and pointed out the issue and at least given her the option of discreetly throwing it out.”
“The way you tell it, from her perspective, all she saw was you dumping her food, then when she’s obviously upset that you’re dumping it for no reason known to her, you’re screaming about dog hair and throwing accusations around like she did it on purpose in front of everyone.”
“Being right doesn’t give you license to humiliate her.”- Waddiwasiiiii
Dog hair must be extremely high on the list of things people never want to find in their food.
Even so, one has little doubt the OP could have found a more discreet way of addressing this issue and making sure no one else ate the contaminated potatoes.
The scene caused by the OP could very well have put an end to any further potlucks down the line.