Living with your parents as an adult can be a difficult and awkward situation. And for one woman on Reddit, things got extra dramatic when she tried to protect her privacy.
So the woman, who goes by the name ChipsandPepsi on the site, took her story to the AITA (Am I The A**hole) subReddit to get some perspective.
The Original Poster (OP) asked:
“AITA for putting a lock on my room door after mother threw away new clothes?”
She explained:
“I, 35f[emale[ live with my parents. No kids, full time job and pay $650.00 rent a month. My parents are legally separated but have stayed living together for the past 10 years.”
“Basically, we all live in a roommate situation. Everyone buys and cooks their own food, everyone tidies up the communal spaces and for the most part we just all do our own thing.”
“5 years ago I had my own apartment but lost my job, car and good credit. Mom invited me to move back in so I could rebuild and I’ve been doing well in fixing credit and saving money. Mom guilts me to stay now because she relies on my rent $.”
“My mom has always been nosy and overbearing. As children, she never gave me or my brother privacy. Now that I’m home again, she’s got a habit of doing a quick knock on my door and then opening it before I can say ‘come in’.”
“She’s obtrusive when I’m on the phone and gets angry when I ask her to leave my doorway. I’ve nicely requested that she stay out of the room when I’m not home but I know she goes through my stuff. She calls my room dirty but it’s not; some clothes on a chair and an unmade bed is not the end of the world.”
“Things blew up when I received a package of lingerie. I immediately tried everything on and of course my mom picked that moment to leave her room to come knocking at my door.”
“I yelled for her not to come in. She got huffy and went back into her room slamming her door. I got irritated and took all the new pieces and shoved them back in the shipping bag along with all the tissue paper and clear plastic.”
“I left the package on the chair that I throw my dirty clothes on. I leave for work the next day and come back home to no clothes or package on the chair. I ask my mom if she’d seen it and she says ‘yes, I threw your trash away and washed your clothes’.”
“I kind of lost it. I told her that she’d thrown out $80.00 of brand new underwear and she had no right to be in my room in the first place. She yelled back that it was her house and if I didn’t keep my room a pigsty, she wouldn’t have a reason to go in there.”
“Today, I went and bought a new locking doorknob and installed it while my mom was out of the house then I left for the day. About 2 hours after I left, my mom started blowing up my phone with angry texts demanding I change the doorknob back and that I didn’t have her permission.”
“When I got home, I completely ignored her and locked myself in my room as she banged on the door and screamed for 5 minutes straight. I’m now looking for apartments. I was saving for a house down payment but I can’t take this drama.”
“Brother says I should have left years ago and that our mom is too manipulative. My friend says that I should not have put a lock on the door without permission and should have just moved out as soon as possible. 4 days in and Mom has yet to apologize for tossing my lingerie, just gave me the silent treatment until today when she blew up about the lock.”
“AITA for installing the lock?”
OP’s fellow Redditors were then asked to evaluate who was in the wrong based on the following categories:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
For them, this conflict was a no-brainer.