There is little that is more stressful than meeting your significant other’s parents.
By the time this major milestone has arrived, you’ve firmly established that you and your partner are committed, and in it for the long haul, so you can at least stop worrying about impressing them.
But no matter how long your relationship lasts, you might always find yourself trying to impress their parents, and sadly, their approval is never a guarantee.
Redditor NeedleworkerThese174 had sadly not received the approval of her boyfriend’s parents, who’s mother even went so far as to proposition her to leave him.
Upon hearing of his mother’s actions, the boyfriend of the original poster (OP), let his anger be known to his family, resulting in their temporary estrangement.
Feeling somewhat responsible for causing a familial between her boyfriend and his family, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for telling my boyfriend that his mom tried to pay me $600 to leave him?”
The OP explained how she did not meet the standards of her boyfriend’s family, and was even propositioned to leave him.
“I (23 F[emale]) and my boyfriends mother Mariana (55 F) got into an argument today because she offered me money, $600, to leave my boyfriend because I’m not ‘pure’ Colombian.”
“I was in shock but I told her to get out of my house.”
“She didn’t want to leave because it was her sons house.”
“I told her that if she didn’t leave then I will tell Nick everything.”
“She was shocked and left after that.”
“I was crying, I don’t know for how long, but my brother was home from school.
“He asked what was wrong and he was mad at Mariana but he told me not to worry about it.”
“An hour later Nick came home and he looked like he ran over here.”
“So he asked if what Jayden, my brother, said was true.”
“I said yes. Nick called Jayden and they left.”
“I thought they were gonna go hangout at a game store but no they went to the house of Nick’s parents and Nick went off on his mom about how she had no right to say that to me.”
“Sofia, Nick’s sister, and Dave, Nick’s brother, said it was because Mariana wants the best for Nick.”
“Because apparently to Mariana ‘a Colombian man is only supposed to be with a Colombian woman’.”
“‘It’s how our culture works’.”
“Joe, Nicks father, said that a woman like me doesn’t deserve to be in this family.’
‘Info: I’m half Mexican and half Puerto Rican.”
“Nick is full Colombian.”
“So Nick and Jayden came home then Nick pulled me into a hug and that everything will be ok for me and our baby.’
“Not even 2 minutes ago I got texts saying how dare I turn Nick against his family or that they will ruin my life if I don’t leave Nick.”
‘Nick has not called his mom yet to apologize because he does that when he’s mad at her.”
“Now I feel bad because I turned him against his family.”
“I told Nick to go apologize or call his mom to apologize but he said no that he won’t apologize this time.”
“I called and told some of my friends and half said that I did the right thing while others said I was a complete AH to do that.’
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community firmly took the side of the OP, agreeing she was in no way thee a**hole for telling her boyfriend about his mother’s actions.
Everyone was horrified by what Nick’s mother did and everything his family said, while also being proud of Nick for standing by the OP after all she went through.
“NTA.”
“Hold onto this man, he stood up for you when you needed him to.”
“Sounds like nick’s a keeper.”
“Sounds like it’s time for you, Nick & your soon-to-be baby will be better off without nick’s family.”
“You can keep Jayden around, too.”
“Sorry that these people are such ignorant assholes, but you’re not.”
“NTA in any way.”- cambridge_ax
“Well, do not hesitate to drop the friends that think you are TA when his mother showcases some premium xenophobia toward you.”
“NTA.”- NeedleworkerThese174
“NTA.”
“$600 seems like a paltry sum if you’re pregnant with his baby.”
“Aside from being TA, this was just dumb on his mom’s part.”- thirdtryisthecharm
“NTA.”
“His family are racist a**holes, it’s better if he does turn against them.”- DrMindbendersMonocle
“NTA.”
“Couple should have few secrets.”
“His mom should know you will tell him everything.”- gastropodia42
“NTA.”
“The only AH’s here are his mother and family for believing in this ‘pure blood’ bs’.”-PaintLicker_2022
“NTA.”
“His mom was WAY out of line there.”
“If I were in his position I’d want to know what she said to make you that upset.”- StankThot420
“NTA.”
“Sounds like that title belongs to his mother and father.”
“It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders so just keep your wits about you and don’t let them dictate your life.”
“Just do your best to stay clear of them and if they threaten you/ try something like that again then don’t keep it to yourself and sweep it under the rug.”- Capital-Literature-9
“NTA.”
“My bf is Peruvian and I’m nothing but a plain ole white girl.”
“His family has been incredibly welcoming of me and have made it their goal to ‘make me Peruvian’.”
“I understand the familial bonds in Latin cultures are very, very sacred.”
“Good for Nick for sticking up for you.”
“It’s not your fault his parents have such shitty mindsets.”
“There’s no need for you to feel guilty over something that’s outside of your control.”
“I would say to have a conversation with Nick to see how things are going to be going forward though.”- ZGW12600
“NTA.”
“Show him any abusive texts that they send you as soon as you can, every time.”
“Do not engage or text them back.”- fun_brainz
“NTA.”
“Should’ve told her to give you $300 upfront and then the $300 after so you’re sure about it and then told him.”- at_noober
“NTA.”
“You didn’t turn him against his family.”
“Their own actions turned him against his family.”
“What can be destroyed by the truth, should be.”- VoyagerVII
‘NTA.’
“Anyone else read MIL’s name as ‘marinara’.”- avocadoslut_j
“His family is being ridiculous.’
“They are cultural snobs.”
‘If you and Nick are happy together, that’s what matters.”
“Not what country you were born in or who your parents are.”
“Neither of you owes any of them an apology.”
‘They owe you one.”
“NTA.”- ScoutBandit
“NTA.”
“I’m sorry you have to deal with this sh*t.”
“This is like something out of a bad soap opera.”- gnothro
“NTA.”
“His mom, and dad, are the toxic ones in this sad story.”
“You did nothing wrong.”
“You didn’t specify if your baby has been born yet but in either case, you don’t need all this stress.”
“I honestly don’t see why he has to apologize to his mom for what she said and did.”
“What I do see is a real need to start limiting contact.”
“You both need to be on the same page and hopefully won’t have to go no contact.”- LoveBeach8
“NTA.”
‘She sounds awful!”
“You did nothing wrong.”
“She was ridiculous and he’s standing up for his partner and child like a good man should.”-Littlemack18
“NTA.”
“Boyfriend’s family sounds like a treat.”- IAMTHEADMINNOW
“NTA .”
“His family sounds really crazy.”
“I don’t know how I would deal with it.”- miss-katherine
“NTA this is racism pure & simple.”
“Besides its nick’s family and he dealt with it as he wanted.”
“You should respect that and ignore them.”- trialtestofreddit
“NTA.”
“Is it just me or is there no such thing?”
“Like, is his mom a native with no Hispanic mixture?”
“Otherwise, even a cursory Google search of South American history might be a bit of a shock.”
“For the record, I’m a straight kaleidoscope 20% Hispanic, 10% native, 20% European, 5% African, 2% Jewish and so forth. 23&me is crazy.”
“I love it, hybrid vigor.”
“I think my wife likes me too.”- a**kicker1762
“A ‘pure’ Columbian?”
“The Americas are some of the most racially diverse/mixed places on the planet due to their quite recent colonization, what would ‘pure’ even mean in this context?”
“What a silly notion.”
“NTA his family sucks and anyone telling you that you’re in the wrong is not your friend.”- Chortney
It’s pretty sad that the family of the OP’s boyfriend could be so closed minded when it comes to who their son might marry.
Or that they would think any amount of money would persuade any sensible person to leave the one they love.
At least the OP can take some comfort in knowing that her boyfriend loves her for who she is, and could never be persuaded to leave her.