in , , ,

Parents Of Infant Agree To Split Chores—But The Husband’s Loophole Has His Wife Livid

Tom & Dee Ann McCarthy/Getty Images

The divvying up of household and parental duties has been the source of domestic strife for ages, and for one man on Reddit things became downright dramatic.

When he got tired of cooking for his wife all the time, he took his dilemma to the AITA (Am I The A**hole) subReddit to get some perspective.

The OP (Original Poster) who goes by the name LowRepresentative770 on the platform, asked the anonymous strangers in the subReddit:

“AITA for not serving my wife breakfast, lunch, and dinner when she demands it?”

He explained:

“About 6 months ago, my wife and I decided to split household duties, totally her idea. I had been cooking a lot and she basically said she hated cooking and figuring out food, and if I kept doing it, she would be happy to take on the majority of housework/cleaning.”

“We tried it and thought it went well so we kept doing it.”

“Easy enough. Onto the issue.”

“I’ve started cooking in bulk. On Saturday and Sunday I make one giant meal each day in our instant pot and portion out the remainder of the food into serving-sized Tupperware, basically meal prep.”

“I’ve also stocked the fridge each week with lots of jellies, meats, and cheeses, and the pantry with lots of snacks and bread for quick sandwiches.”

“Now, during the day, she’ll randomly come into my office and tell me ‘I’m hungry’ and want me to make her food. I tell her all of the sandwich options and all of the leftovers that would take her 2 minutes to heat up and she’ll just roll her eyes and leave, which I think is rude.”

“We got into an argument yesterday where she told me I’m not holding up my end of the bargain. She wants breakfast, lunch, dinner, AND snacks served to her throughout the day.”

“I told her that if I’m making myself lunch or dinner, I will make some for her, but I’m not going to drop everything to stand at a microwave for two minutes when she’s capable of doing that herself.”

“I don’t tell her when I think something needs to be cleaned, you know?”

“Anyway, she thinks I’m being a jerk and I think she’s acting childish. AITA”

OP came back to add more details:

“EDIT: okay, a lot of people think I’m the a**hole here, which, after defending myself and still getting told I’m the a**hole, I’m willing to accept.”

“New question – will I be the a**hole if I tell her I want to go back to how things were, where we both clean and both cook? Thank you.”

“EDIT 2: I’m definitely an a**hole. Thank you all, really. I plan to change starting right now. I got my a** handed to me and I deserve it, I’ve been acting shamefully.”

“Final EDIT: I’ve noticed an uptick in NTA comments and I don’t want anyone to get downvoted because they didn’t see my comments.”

“We also have a newborn that she’s been doing 95% of the care for, as well as breastfeeding. I should have mentioned that in the original post.”

OP’s fellow Redditors were then tasked with placing blame based on the following categories:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

And particularly in light of the revelation that he and his wife have a new baby, people were absolutely not having it with this dude!

“…You figured out a way to game the system, congratulations. Instead of picking up the slack and helping, say, keep the kitchen clean or doing a bit of childcare, you’re on Reddit asking if you’re upholding the letter of your agreement.”

“You are, if that’s what you need to hear. You’re just not holding up the spirit of the agreement with a woman who is taking care of your house and child while working from home.”

“That makes you the AH. A colossal one at that.”


“ETA in response to your edit: when faced with the actuality of being responsible for meals – a daily breakfast, lunch, and dinner – you’re hanging up your skillet. That’s…in character.”

“Why don’t you put in a best faith effort by looking up a few recipes and making a weekly meal plan?”Trick_Doughnut_6295

“…As a meal prepper: making two bulk meals for two people for a week takes MAYBE 3 hours…4 if you grocery shop too. Your wife does so much that you are hardly acknowledging with childcare.

“Also who wakes up in the middle of the night for the baby? Who cleans the bathrooms? She probably isn’t getting a lot of sleep ontop of all the work she needs to do for her job.”

“Also, she is breastfeeding. I’m no expert but I’m going to assume that sandwiches for lunch every day is far from the high nutrient diet her body needs to feed the baby. That is being lazy and inconsiderate about her health and the health of your baby.”

“So yeah, YTA.”GentleTugboat

“Honestly, this guy was an a**hole even without all the info he conveniently left out. He agrees to do ‘all the cooking’ and his version of that is two meals a week, supplemented by telling her to heat up leftovers or make herself a sandwich, exchange for her doing all the other household work. That’s some lazy bullsh*t even without a baby in the equation.”AttractiveNuisance37

“If reheating food in the microwave takes such little time and is as easy as he says, then why is it such a big deal for him to do it for her?”shapiro18

“I love these posts where the writer of them leaves out a ton of info to make themselves look better and then perceptive commenters manage to peel back the onion layers of a**holery.”theworldisnotquiet


“I thought those two were just a couple of goofy childfree hams like my dude and me – I was like, ‘Oh lol I’ve been the wife, I get it.’ But OP TWISTED the story by omission! I see OP has admitted their A H-ery, but DANG. I got whiplash!”hellolittledeer

“…I have 4 kids and one of them is a newborn. My husband and I split everything equally. If all he did was meal prep, I would be pissed!”

“OP needs to get off his a** and make food or something. Holy sh*t!”Jeneo00

“…I dont get why it is so difficult for so many men to just take responsability. You live there too! And dont you care about your partner? Arent you in this together?”

“I see so many posts about this and dont get it. I suck at cooking and I am not the best at cleaning but I try to do as much as I can. I dont get it.”lookingforfreedom90

“His wife is a massive SAINT to be putting up with this sh*t. What a self-righteous a**hat.”peachyperfect3

At least this guy quickly learned the err of his ways and owned up to how wildly wrong he was. There’s hope for this couple yet!

Written by Peter Karleby

Peter Karleby is a writer, content producer and performer originally from Michigan. His writing has also appeared on YourTango, Delish and Medium, and he has produced content for NBC, The New York Times and The CW, among others. When not working, he can be found tripping over his own feet on a hiking trail while singing Madonna songs to ward off lurking bears.