Whether parents want to think about it or not, their children are eventually going to grow up and start relationships of their own.
The best thing to do is to properly prepare them for when that time comes, pointed out the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.
Redditor turquoiselephant’s parents were not as ready for a sex-positive household as they thought they were.
After seeing their reactions, the Original Poster (OP) wondered if she was in the wrong.
She asked the sub:
“AITA for bringing home condoms even though I don’t plan on using them myself?”
The OP received condoms at a college health fair.
“I (21 [female]) attended my college’s health fair with a friend and was given a bag of condoms.”
“Since my friend didn’t need hers, she gave hers to me.”
“I brought them home and forgot the bag was in my hand.”
“When my parents confronted me about it, I told them they were condoms.”
The OP’s parents did not agree with her bringing them home.
They were livid as h**l… As ‘progressive’ as they are, they shamed me about this and wanted me to reflect on the kind of character I have to BRING HOME FREE CONDOMS.”
“I’m currently crying in my room about this.”
“(My reason for bringing them home was because I thought of condoms kinda like feminine products, and I’ll make sure to put some them in my feminine care bag.)”
“Also, my mom compared me ‘bringing home the condoms’ to ‘bringing home coke’ or other types of substances, like what the f**k?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some said the OP’s parents needed to rethink their opinions.
“They’re two ways you’re going to handle this. 1. tell your parents that there were a lot more condoms but you used them before you brought them home.”
“2. Ask your parents if you can exchange the condoms for pregnancy tests.”
“Your parents need to get a grip. Someone gave you condoms. You didn’t throw them away. If that bothers them then they shouldn’t have raised a child to adulthood. Because that’s what happens when you have an adult: they have sex.”
“Whether or not you are or not is up to you. And it’s always a good idea to get comfortable with them before you have to use them.” – DarcyKnits
“I’d be thrilled if my college student brought home condoms!! (I mean, I’m not quite there yet but just thinking about it!) I know what I got up to in college with those free health service condoms!” – eli121012
“Condoms are a safe and legal way to protect yourself from STDs vs drugs like coke are illegal.”
“I’m sorry your parents’ insecurities are projected onto you. Also free!! Hugs sent your way. Also NTA” – TheMoofia
“NTA – Your parents cannot be both sex-positive and also shame you for being in possession of condoms at your age, those two things are mutually exclusive.” – sunlikebutactually
Others said the OP could have brought home far worse things.
“I mean, better a bag of condoms than a bag of baby clothes.” – GodzillaAteMyTaco
“OP you should say this to them.”
“‘So… You’d rather I get pregnant? Is that what you’re saying? Because if you don’t want me to get pregnant, this is how I avoid that.”” – lordmwahaha
“Or is it better if she brings home an STD? I don’t get how people are against contraception and sexual education. Not to mention that the OP is already 21! How come they talk to her like that?” – WestInvestigator7367
“Well, you are a person who surely will not get STDs or get pregnant through neglect of safe sex when you decide to be sexually active. My response probably would have been: ‘Well, would you rather prefer I come home with an unplanned baby?'”
“Someone who has a free bag of condoms is also a person who can give some to a friend in need lest they have unprotected sex.”
“Having condoms doesn’t equal having immediate sex orgies or being immoral (and even if you had sex orgies, you are an adult and you’d be responsible, so they really have no ground). I am sorry your parents reacted unreasonably to something actually innocent and responsible.” – fettnaepfchen
Some questioned the parents’ use of the word “progressive.”
“‘Progressive’ is my mum telling me in my teens, ‘Please try not to get pregnant in your teens – here’s how you can avoid that – but if something happens and you do, it’s not the end of the world; we’ll deal with it.'”
“OP’s parents are not progressive. They’re conservatives in a trench coat.” – lordmwahaha
“Your parents are not progressive. If you were 14 I might be a little bit understanding but you are 21. Progressive parents would have been giving you condoms as a teenager just to have even if you didn’t plan on having sex, and at 21 they wouldn’t be saying anything at all because it’s none of their f**king business and they would know that.” – CeruleanRose9
“You’re 21 years old. If you are old enough to buy alcohol, I’m pretty sure you’re old enough to practice safe sex. If they were progressive, they wouldn’t be bashing you for bringing home free condoms for when you’re prepared to have sex.” – AlienSuccubus
“I’m sorry your parents are absolutely crazy. They don’t sound progressive at all. You’re 21, too old for their ‘go reflect’ bulls**t, condoms are NOT bad at all, definitely not bad like coke, and them shaming you is just mean, abusive behavior.”
“You’re not crazy, this isn’t something normal people get mad at.” – xxAustynxx
The OP was admittedly upset in her post, and the subReddit understood why, but they also insisted the OP was right to keep the condoms and stand up for sex-positivity, even if it wasn’t as prevalent in her home as she originally thought.
Whether or not she planned to use them herself, she could still provide them for others in her life who needed safe sex options, especially if they didn’t have the same accessibility to them as the OP did at her college.