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Teen Accused Of ‘Ruining’ Friend’s Chances With Injured Crush By ‘Bullying’ Him Into Going To Hospital

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For some of us, meeting someone we like is a big deal, and we take our dating lives seriously.

But trying to flirt with someone who was just injured might be a bit much, admitted the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.

Redditor dullign was criticized by her friend after they disagreed about whether to send an injured guy to the hospital or to flirt with him.

After seeing her friend’s reaction, the Original Poster (OP) wondered if she should have just stayed out of it.

She asked the sub:

“AITA for making my friend lose her chance with a guy she liked by ‘bullying him’ into going to the hospital?”

The OP and her friend went to a party.

“My (19 [Female]) friend (18 [Female]) and I went to a frat party over the weekend.”

“The party was in a packed basement, and toward the end of the night, we went upstairs to get some air.”

“There were barely any people upstairs, except this one frat guy sitting on a couch alone in the corner.”

They met a guy on their way out of the party.

“We walked into the room, and he said hi and started chatting with us.”

“He was cute, and my friend was flirting a lot with him. He apologized for sitting down (we were standing) and said his knee was hurting.”

“I asked why, thinking it was mundane.”

“He was like, ‘Oh, I got hit by a car. I’m fine though.'”

“This freaked me out a little, but I figured he meant like a week ago, so I asked when he got hit.”

“He was like, ‘Oh, about an hour ago. I was riding my bike back to the frat in the pouring rain, and some guy didn’t see me and hit me with his car. But I got up and walked my bike here because it was my turn to set out all the drinks tonight.'”

The OP insisted the guy go to the hospital.

“I admit I might have been acting irrationally because my little brother got hit by a car this summer (he’s alright), and I was thinking of him during the whole conversation.”

“I told the guy he should go to the hospital to get looked at.”

“He was like, ‘It won’t hurt that bad in the morning. It is what it is.'”

“For several minutes, I tried to get him to go to the hospital while my friend tried to flirt with him.”

“He eventually decided to go to the university health services and left the party after I tried for some time to convince him.”

The OP’s friend was mad at her. 

“My friend got p**sed off at me because she said he was clearly fine and it wasn’t a big deal. She said my irrationality ruined her chance with a cute guy.”

“She said I bullied him into seeking medical attention.”

“AITA for being paranoid about injuries?”

Fellow Redditors weighed in:

  • NTA: Not the A**hole
  • YTA: You’re the A**hole
  • ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
  • NAH: No A**holes Here

Some said the OP did the right thing.

“Um major NTA this dude was literally hit BY A CAR and your friend more interested in flirting with him than seeking medical attention???”Tricky_Ad_3605

“She didn’t care about him, she only cared about getting laid.”

“You’re the only person in this situation who was actually being a caring human.”WhatThis4

“He seemed to be in shock. He needed to go to the hospital ASAP, and OP did the right thing.”

“A lot of injuries might not show up right away. Honestly, that is terrifying that anyone would think otherwise.”kayt3000

“Can we just appreciate that this guy got hit by a car and his first priority was putting drinks out for people?”

“NTA.”

“He needed to get checked out to make sure there was nothing more severe. Sore knees are one thing, but he’ll be lucky if that’s his only injury.”

“Your friend is an a**hole for hitting on someone when he clearly needed medical attention.”

“The adrenaline from something like that will have kept him somewhat not feeling it as much, but adrenaline is supposed to last you until you’re out of danger or getting it looked at.”

“If you check in later on, I hope the guy’s okay.”TheGingerCynic

“He could have had a head injury or anything if he was hit by a car and came off his bike.”

“My daughter had a fall off a bike at about the same age and she hit the ground pretty hard. She was wearing a helmet, so we didn’t think too much of it at the time (she was with friends, we didn’t see it). Apart from her hip and shoulder which were sore and bruised, she seemed fine.”

“Fast forward 2 days and suddenly she’s gone all white and is being sick, and we decided to get her to the hospital pronto where she was diagnosed with a concussion.”

“A concussion can apparently take DAYS to show up, which I know now but didn’t then, and although head scans didn’t show any damage to her brain, she’s been left significantly disabled by post-concussion syndrome to the point where she’s unable to work.”

“She’s doing fine, all things considered, and she’s happy and living her best life, but it’s not the life any of us thought she would have, and it’s certainly not the one she was on the path to at the time of the accident.”

“So the moral of this story is that you never really know what’s happened to someone, even with what appears to be a ‘minor’ accident and ‘minor’ injuries. Head trauma doesn’t always show up straight away and the effects can be serious and life-changing.”

“You’re absolutely not NTA, OP, but your friend is an idiot. And I’m really glad your brother was OK.”Red-Peril

Others said the OP’s friend missed an opportunity.

“Honestly, the girl could’ve scored extra points by actually showing the same concerns as OP and walking the guy to health services.”

“He gets a check-up, she makes a good impression, and she might even score later that night.”raikuha

“The friend is a little dense. This is a perfect opportunity to get him alone, she just has to offer to walk with him to the health center to keep him company.”

“Young people!”saucynoodlelover

“This is what I was thinking, too, like, dummy, if you want to flirt with a cute person, you’ve literally been handed a dozen ways to do that!”

“Not that I mean ‘be nice in the expectation of sex,’ of course, but really, ‘Can we call someone for you or take you to the doctor?'”

“And then follow with, ‘Here’s my number, let me know you’re okay, okay?’ which would have been far more effective than just small talk with someone who’d just been hit by a f**king car.”_Kay_Tee_

“It feels like she missed a golden opportunity to help take him to student health. Way better way to ingratiate yourself than drunken flirting.”DuckDodgers22

“Also, if she wanted to flirt, she could have just gone with him? I was going to say drive him, but I realized she had probably been drinking.”

“But that should definitely get you some brownie points.”frugalrhombus

The OP was second-guessing herself after seeing how angry her friend was with her, but the subReddit didn’t agree. The OP had cared more about making sure the guy was okay, which was the higher priority, after all.

Her friend could have gone with him to the hospital if she wanted to spend some quality time with him, as the sub pointed out.

Written by McKenzie Lynn Tozan

McKenzie Lynn Tozan lives in North Chicago, where she works as a poet, freelance writer, and editor. She received her MFA in Creative Writing from Western Michigan University, and her BA in English from Indiana University South Bend. Her poems have appeared in Rogue Agent, Whale Road Review, the James Franco Review, Thank You for Swallowing, and elsewhere; and her essays and book reviews have appeared with Memoir Mixtapes, The Rumpus, BookPage, and Motherly, among others. When she's not reading and writing, she's in her garden or spending time with her family. For more, visit www.mckenzielynntozan.com.