Parenting means protecting your child at all costs.
Redditor Dangerousbean1984 recently took this to heart when he made his son’s teacher cry.
This led the Original Poster (OP) to subReddit “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA).
He asked:
“AITA for yelling at my son’s teacher and making her cry”
He went on to explain.
“Last Thursday I, [36-year-old Male] got a call from my son’s school telling me I needed to come and collect him because he had passed out during class.”
“My son has passed out a good few times before, so we’ve made sure he knows what to do when he starts to feel faint to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself.”
“However, when I arrived at the school my son was holding an ice pack to his head, when I asked about it the nurse told me he had hit his head when he fell.”
“I wondered why he hadn’t lay down like we taught him to do, I brushed it off and decided to ask him about it later as he was still kind of out of it.”
“The next day I asked him about it and what he told me made my blood boil. Apparently when my son had first started to feel like he was going to pass out he tried to tell his teacher.”
“When he stood up to talk to her he was immediately yelled at to sit back down. The next time he tried to tell her she told him that he didn’t look sick so he wasn’t allowed to go to the nurses office.”
“Then, his class was doing an activity that required standing for practically the rest of the lesson.”
“Before the activity started my son, yet again told this teacher that he felt like he was going to pass out and asked if he could sit the activity out.”
“The teacher responded by yelling at him, claiming he was just being lazy and was making excuses.”
“My son’s friend was getting worried about him so he told the teacher, who then started yelling at his friend, accusing them both of trying to get out of lesson.”
“Not even a minute later my son passed out, and according to his friend and a couple other classmates, she acted very shocked.”
“As if she hadn’t been ignoring him trying to tell her how he felt for the last 5 minutes.”
“I’m extremely worried about the impact this will have on my son, as when the fainting first started he didn’t tell any of his teachers as he was scared that they were going to yell at him.”
“This resulted in quite a few injuries from falling.”
“It has taken a while for him to start telling them when he’s feeling faint and I’m afraid this incident will cause him to stop asking and he will hurt himself.”
“I had wanted to go down to the school that day but my son had stayed off and my wife wasn’t home from work yet.”
“The following Monday I arranged an appointment with the Principal.”
“After I explained what had happened, he called in my son’s teacher, who then tried to deny the fact that he ever told her anything and he had just randomly collapsed.”
“This is where I may be TA. By this point I was pissed, I began to scream at her, yelling about how my son could have gotten hurt.”
“I was so pissed I hadn’t even noticed that she’d started to cry. By that point I was asked to leave by the principal.”
“My wife and some of my friends think I’m in the right, but my parents and the other half of my friends think I went too far. I don’t know about this one”
“[Edit] I’m just gonna answer some frequently asked questions that the answers weren’t included in the original post”
“1. We are not in the US so a 504 plan is not in place, however we do have something similar”
“2. My son is in the middle of getting a diagnosis, doctors say the most likely option is POTS”
“3. My son is 13, and I would say he’s a fairly well behaved kid, only sometimes getting in trouble for stupid sh*t that 13 year old boys do, he usually stops after he gets a verbal warning.”
“We’ve never had any major issues with his behavior.”
“4.Yes, the teacher was aware of his episodes”
The OP was left to wonder,
“What do you guys think, AITA?”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
-
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided:
“NTA. The teacher repeatedly yelled at your son, berated him, caused him to injure himself physically, and quite possibly scared him away from communicating his needs in the future.”
“She is a bully. When confronted, she started lying to cover up her behavior, and eventually crying.”
“Boohoo. That’s what bullies do: bully, lie, then cry when not let off the hook.”
“You losing your cool is completely understandable. Your parents don’t need to have an opinion about it, and your wife is in your corner.”
“Consult a lawyer. I bet the principal won’t ask a lawyer to leave.” – Content-Plenty-268
“I’m assuming your son has a diagnosed medical condition that is on file with the school and his teachers have been made aware of his condition and how to prevent injuries?”
“At this point I think I would take my concerns to the Board of Education and let them know that you intend to speak with an attorney.”
“Yelling at the teacher was probably not your best move, but I certainly understand when it comes to the safety of our children. It’s hard to maintain our cool sometimes.”
“I’m going to say NTA.” – Glinda-The-Witch
“NTA, that teacher is a bully who deserved getting called out. Yelling after she straight up lied is warranted.””
“If you’re in the US, please get this condition and his accommodations into a 504 or IEP plan if it’s not there already.” – C_Majuscula
“NTA I think she needed that dose of reality for her negligence and dishonesty. She literally endangered your child’s life b/c he didn’t ‘look sick’.”
“I don’t remember those school floors being very soft. If he hits his head the right way, it can cause life-long complications.”
“With that in mind, it might not hurt to have your son looked over even if he says he feels fine.”
“He was just taught not to talk about feeling unwell, so he might try to hide it if he’s not feeling 100%.” – ExRiverFish4557
“I would honestly get quotes from the friend and other people that were in the class, go back to the school, talk to the principal again.”
“Because that teacher knowingly put your child in danger and actively bullied the child that is NOT ok.”
“Yelling and berating a child as an adult that has power over them is never ok that on its own warrants going down to the school and talking to the teacher.”
“Also as someone who still has trouble advocating for their own rights, I would maybe get a therapist for your child to help them learn to advocate for themselves while of course still letting them know that you will always advocate for them.”
“I don’t even like kids, and I would have gone down there and screamed at the principal and the teacher for a random stranger.”
“Teachers who abuse their power and berate kids and are just nasty are disgusting. I don’t care if you had a bad week. If you can’t behave properly around children, you should not work with them, period.” – No_Possibility1074
“Based on all the info shared NTA, your kid is your world. Obviously, the teacher is not going to come clean..”
“However, you may need to have the side of your son confined by a classmate as, sadly, you’re only getting it from the perspective of your son.”
“FYI not calling your son a liar. I’m simply saying there are two sides to every story.” – Ok_Peak1112
“NTA, she shouldn’t have ignored your son. Especially because there was a protocol in place. It’s a bad thing she lied.”
“But I do think that screaming is never the solution. You can also be angry and make a point without being verbally aggressive.”
“You also don’t know how the ambiance was in the classroom, maybe the kids were teasing her, and she thought that your son was joking around.”
“(It’s not an excuse, I’m just trying to think of why the teacher would act like this).” – Traditional_Belt6783
”I’m a teacher. You’re NTA. I would have lost my cool and perhaps my job since I worked in the same school as my kids.”
“That woman is, first and foremost, responsible for the safety of her students while in her care. She wouldn’t allow a student to jump up and down on a desk for safety reasons.”
“She should take a kid who feels faint seriously for the same reasons.” – StacyB125
“NTA”
“I had asthma growing up. In kindergarten, I had a sub teacher refuse to let me go to the nurse’s office for my inhaler (the 1990s, inhalers had to be kept in the nurse’s office).”
“Luckily, the teacher’s helper was a neighbor who called my mom and told her what was happening. Granted, by the time my mom got to me, I was gasping for air on the floor.”
“The teacher then tried to tell my mom she could take me to the office for my inhaler.”
“My mom just took me home, and I had to have two nebulizer treatments just to start breathing normally again (We only lived about a block from the school).”
“The office tried to scold my mom for not “checking” me out of school until they learned what had actually happened, then they dropped it and promised it would never happen again.”
“This teacher put your son’s health/safety at risk. She deserved to be yelled at, especially after she tried to LIE just to cover her a**.”
“Yes, being a teacher is hard, but under NO circumstances should a child’s health be put at risk like this.”
“Your son warned her, but she refused to believe him and even yelled at him and accused him of lying. As a result, he got injured. THAT’S ON HER.” – RogueInsanity90
Safety is an integral part of receiving a proper education.