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Dad Disinvites Family From Thanksgiving After Catching His Sister-In-Law Stealing His Son’s Birthday Money

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Birthday’s are a special time for most children.

Having family and friends give gifts and cards is exciting and fun. During this pandemic even children can use a morale boost and what better way than having a wonderful birthday?

But what if a family member stole those gifts?

Redditor IamNotARealDr  was shocked and upset to find a member of his family had done just that.

He turned to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit with the question:

“AITA for un inviting my mother and brother & sister in-law from Thanksgiving dinner and shutting the electric off at my brother’s home because my sister in-law stole $400 from my son’s birthday presents?“

The original poster (OP) explained:

“We had a ‘drive by’ birthday party for my 3 year old for friends and had grandparents and aunts and uncles over for a very small gathering. Most people gave cards and cash.”

”My security camera caught her taking the money.”

“So I un invited my brother and sister in-law from Thanksgiving and my mother said if they aren’t invited, she’s not coming too. So I told her fine and told my brother if they didn’t return the cash, I’d be calling the electric company to take the account out of my name.”

”The account was in my name because they can’t get service, because they owe the utility company $1200. So they would pay me each month for what the bill was. So I called and cancelled the account, the power was shut off yesterday.”

After a slew of responses OP added additional edits for further clarification. 

“Wow. This blew up. Thanks for the awards and silver! I’ll add some clarification…Brother and sister-in-law have no kids. So I DID NOT shut power off on any innocent little kids.‘Who was at the party?’: My mother, my brother and sister-in-law, my wife’s mom and dad and her brother.”

“Sister-in-law jimmied open a locked door to take the envelopes off my desk (home office) that is a spare bedroom. The door is always locked. I have work equipment in there that I don’t want my son to get into.”

“I confronted brother and sister-in-law, they denied it. Even though I told them my hallway camera shows her as the only one entering the room. I have not filed a police report yet. I am considering it. This occured last Sunday.“

”Additional clarification….Brother eventually came around and admitted it, wanted me to let him and Sister-in-law pay it back over time. But wouldn’t agree to a plan.”

Redditors were asked to judge the dad’s reaction by voting:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared OP was NTA but the person stealing from a 3 year old’s birthday cards sure was.

“NTA. I like you. This is how you handle selfish, entitled people.”~lizzyborden666

NTA. Good on you for cutting of the electricity. Not petty at all. They should be happy you didn’t get her charged for theft.”~Smiley-Canadian

Vindictive? No, what you did is referred to as ‘justified.’ Who tf steals from the child of the person who helps pay their utility bill? Don’t p*ss in the river you drink from. NTA.”~rzrbladess

100% this. NTA. Don’t bite the hand that keeps your electricity on.”~blacksteel15

NTA how could you consciously steal from a child? I would go further and press charges.”~Buffalo48

NTA. I would also file a police report and show them the security footage. A person who would steal money from a child is the lowest kind of person and has probably done a lot worse.”~crystallz2000

NTA, you told them to return it but they did not, hence the consequences. Good job at drawing the boundaries and not caving into ‘Forgive because they are Family’ in order to keep the peace.”

“Do that and they’ll treat you like a doormat forever.”

”Forgiveness is not for those who don’t repent. Sad that your mom decided to be an enabler and expect you to suck it up.”

“Stay strong coz she’s going to guilt you into it again and again.”

“If they need money, they should be honest about it and ask for a loan from you or other family members. Stealing is no no.”~emmy1905

NTA but the rest of them are. What’s up with mom siding with the thief ..wrong side to take. She can put the power in her name and have them over for Thanksgiving to steal from her.”~Curlytomato

“My mom emptied two bank accounts that were set up for me and my little brother by our grandparents (her parents). I didn’t find out until I turned 18 and was supposed to gain access to it.”

“Several more incidents like that led me to cut all contact with her about six years ago. My grandparents still try to make me talk to her, even though she has done so much worse towards them.”

“I guess I get it, but I’m never speaking to her again.”~MesaCityRansom

“99% chance the Mom’s enabling is why brother/SIL thought stealing from a kid was okay.”

“Too many parents don’t realize the harm that comes from never drawing a line for their kids. They won’t grow out of bad behavior if they never have consequences.”~stumblios

“She stole from a child, and still expected you to continue helping her financially?!? No.”~HowardProject

“NTA, all I could think of is what kind of asshole steals money from a three year old child.”~squee_bastard

The OP would be within their rights to report such a theft to the police, family or not. Redditors certainly thought they handled this situation with grace given what happened. Hopefully, the young child was able to still enjoy their gifts and birthday.

Written by Heidi Dockery

Heidi Dockery is a Maine artist & nature enthusiast with an affinity for libraries. She studies Criminal Justice with a special focus on psychology & sociology at the University of Maine. When not studying, painting, or re-reading the works of Terry Pratchett, she volunteers & enjoys various activities most would label nerdy.