One of the key decisions every parent has to make is, both, a simple and paramount one:
What will they name their baby?
Will other people like the name? Will people make fun? Will they be able to find any trinkets with their name, and correct spelling, on it?
Feeling the pressure of this on the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit, a future mom had a questionable reaction to some feedback.
Redditor LindyG12 explained their feelings but was not well-received.
Now the Original Poster (OP) wonders if they were wrong for being honest with the mom:
“AITA for my reaction to my friend’s baby name?”
The OP thought their friend’s name choice was questionable.
“This is the first one of my friends to have a baby, so I haven’t run into this before.”
“My friend ‘Kelsey’ just found out she is having a girl. She announced on social media with a picture of the ultrasound and a frame with the baby’s name.”
“She mentioned her favorite name had been Bindi, but she was told it was cultural appropriation, so she picked out something similar. The name—Bundi Skye.”
“The first thing that came to my mind was Ted Bundy.”
The future mom reached out, inquiring.
“I didn’t comment or anything on the post, she reached out later and messaged me, ‘So I can tell by your silence you don’t like the name…why? Be honest.'”
“I responded, ‘The first thing that came to mind was the association with Ted Bundy—sorry!'”
The friend did not receive it well.
“She was extremely pissed off and sent me a long angry message I won’t quote here, but the gist of it was that I have a sick mind and just because I’m obsessed with messed up people doesn’t mean everyone is, and that’s not what most people will think of.”
“I’m not obsessed with Ted Bundy at all, it’s just the first association that came to mind.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some agreed and said they thought of Ted Bundy the serial killer or Al Bundy from Married… with Children.
“I’m dating myself here, but I immediately thought of Al Bundy from married with children. Then Ted bundy. Either way, NTA. Why does “be honest” never mean “be honest”?” – electrichyena
“Al bundy is not exactly a great namesake either. Better than Ted bundy but still not great.” – DazzlingTurnover
“What else does anyone possibly think when they hear ‘bundi’? I literally can’t think of anything else, and it’s good that she heard it before it went on a birth certificate.” – Clare_not_a_bear
“Yes! And when you hear it, you can’t tell how it’s spelled, and most people are going to just hear ‘Bundy.'” – sqibbery
“The only other thing I can think of is the German American Bund, which isn’t much better as an association.”
“(It was a Pro-Nazi group in the US in the late 30s, [for the record])” – KylieQuilor
Others agreed and said to go with the name “Bindi.”
“I say she should just name her daughter Bindi as she planned. Alot of people have names that trace back to different countries and cultures.”
“My name has russian roots and I’m Black. So what? They thought it was a pretty name. And so is Bindi.” – Majestic-Meringue-40
“It makes me think of Bundaberg rum, which often gets shortened to Bundy but that’s probably strictly an Australian thing.”
“I don’t really understand why Bindi is cultural appropriation, can anyone explain that? To me, Bindis are big thorn-like things in grass and it mostly just makes me think of Bindi Irwin.” – Captain_Quoll
“I thought of Bindi Irwin too. It’s a much prettier name than Bundy. Bundy in the US is the last name of a serial killer lol.” – Suckerforcats
“In Australia, Bindi is either Steve Irwin’s daughter (named after his croc) or grass buzzies you get in your feet during summer.”
“Bundy is a type of rum. Delicious. But I wouldn’t call my kid Bundi unless my other kid was called Coke.” – Odd-Sprinkles6186
“Being Australian I had always assumed Bindi Irwin was named after the Bindi weed, notorious for its little prickly pods (‘Bindi Eyes’) that hide in the grass waiting to inflict pain on unsuspecting barefooted children.”
“So I googled it, and it turns out she was named after her father’s favourite Crocodile (!) who was probably named after the weed.” – CompleteAlbatross5
Some questioned why the friend bothered to say, “Be honest.”
“It’s like ‘tell me and you won’t be in trouble’.” – beauty-and-rage
“Al Bundy was my first thought too!”
“Also, NTA. She asked you to be honest, then was upset because you were honest?! She’s the A.”
“You were silent to be respectful and she sought out your opinion knowing she would most likely not like it. I think she just wanted your reassurance that you liked it and couldn’t deal with reality.” – LazsloandNadja
“‘Be honest’ almost always means ‘tell me a truth I want to hear’.” – GarrZillarr
“Nta, you answered honestly. When people say be honest about opinions about baby names, they don’t like it when you don’t show over enthusiasm about the name.”
“You gave your honest opinion and that matters. You didn’t sugar coat it. Your friend may have taken it as a personal attack on her, it’s ok, she’ll get over it.” – Einsten20192021
“NTA: It’s not like you said anything to her. You didn’t comment.”
“She specifically sought you out and pulled it out of you why you didn’t fawn all over the name. You were being honest.”
“She totally overreacted. I’d have thought of Ted Bundy first too. I think most people will.” – NorthernLitUp
It was probably disappointing for the expectant mom to hear her friend didn’t like her future child’s name, but as the subReddit pointed out, she did ask for an honest response.
Always be careful what you wish for… and don’t ask questions that you may not want the answers to.