One thing people need to learn is to stop commenting on somebody’s weight.
You never know truly why that person looks the way they do and it is not an on-sight indicator of health or fitness. Someone can be athletic and extremely strong and not have a stereotypically “hot” body.
Redditor shattalo is a bona fide example of such a person.
They gained a lot of weight after lifesaving operations they had no control over. But the weight was a by-product of something that literally helped save their life.
After yelling at a doctor who gave them some very negative feedback about their weight, they went to the popular subReddit “Am I The A**hole?” or “AITA” to see if they somehow stepped over the line for defending their dignity.
They asked:
“AITA for yelling at a doctor?”
Our original poster, or OP, talked about the condition that nearly killed them.
“Growing up I was always a normal weight, but when I was a teenager I was treated for a life threatening condition.”
“The medication and treatments made me gain over 150lbs. The doctors told me it was a toss up as to whether I’d lose the weight, I never did.”
“I’m not upset about it, I’m alive and for awhile it looked as though I wouldn’t be.”
But unfortunately, people don’t treat them the same.
“I definitely notice a difference in the way people treated me between being normal weight and obese, especially doctors.”
“When I was normal weight I was treated like a person and doctors listened to me and took my concerns seriously.”
“When I became obese they were very rude and unkind and only wanted to talk about my weight. I could be in for stitches from a car crash and they’d want to talk about my weight and only my weight.”
After getting weight loss surgery, they were hopeful for a better life.
“For many reasons, but mostly how the medical field treated me; I got weight loss surgery. It was very hard, I had a lot of complications and was laid up for 2 months afterwards.”
“For those who don’t know you have to completely relearn how to eat after this surgery, it is difficult. I lost about 100lbs in a year and I’m still losing, though it has slowed down.”
But then came a doctor who continued making OP’s life difficult.
“I recently moved to a new state for work and had to get a new pcp. He had all my records including my childhood condition and weight loss surgery.”
“All he could talk about was my weight, telling me I was still considered overweight and I needed to work harder.”
“I told him I was still losing from my surgery, he said he wanted me to lose faster. I said my surgeon was happy with my progress and kindly asked him to move on, but then he told me I took the easy way out with weight loss surgery.”
“I lost it. I told him none of it was easy. It wasn’t easy almost dying at 15, it wasn’t easy laying in bed for 2 months vomiting nonstop, it wasn’t easy relearning how to eat.”
“He muttered about how unhealthy America is. I told him to go f**k himself and left in a blind rage.”
“AITA For yelling at his place of work?”
Anonymous strangers weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
Reddit agreed if they were in OP’s place, they would have lost their temper too.
“NTA. The doctor was incredibly unprofessional, inhumanely rude, and tried to contradict your surgeon (who I’m assuming knows more about the procedure then he does).”
“I don’t know what the process would be to report a doctor (or if it even exists) but you should consider it if it does.”-Trashmanjoe
“NTA. Doctors have an obligation to care for patients. Maybe that involves tough love sometimes, but it does not involve judgment and belittling.”
“He has terrible bedside manner and needs to reevaluate how he talks to patients. Congratulations on your progress.”-ArchieS0121
“NTA. I’ve had more than one doctor focus solely on my weight when I’m trying to deal with other problems.”
“I’m fat. I’m not morbidly obese, but they like to shove all my problems under the ‘because you’re fat’ umbrella.”
“I had one doctor even try to peddle his ‘weight loss seminar’ that he expected me to pay for when I went in for a completely unrelated to my weight reason.”
“Some doctors like to be lazy and instead of actually looking at what might be wrong, they lump it under weight and miss a lot of signs for serious illnesses because of it.”
“‘Well, she/he was fat. How was I supposed to know they had a tumor/blood clot/diabetes/cancer/thyroid disorder?'”
“By… looking? By using your 10 year education to actually diagnose someone instead of seeing ’50lbs overweight, so that’s your problem. Stop being so fat.'”-yay_darkness
“NTA ask for the patient advocate or office manager and report him for being so unprofessional and rude.”
“This is actually a major problem and you can find way too many stories of overweight especially women having serious medical conditions and symptoms ignored due to weight.”
“Oh and congratulations on surviving and on your weight loss journey.”-MKAnchor
In fact, lack of equivalence in healthcare is a real thing when it comes to peoples’ weights.
“Nta. I’ve heard that called ‘fat broken arm syndrome.’ You come in for something else and they only focus on your weight.”
“This kind of crap, along with women and bipoc not being believed when they’re in pain make more than a few people dread doctor visits.”
“Make your experience known to the practice, the more people talk about these experiences. I hope your future visits are better.”-adlittle
“NTA. Firstly good on you for coming through such huge health challenges and still being someone strong enough to advocate for good medical care for overweight people.”
“Because that’s what you were doing in advocating for yourself you also advocate for others. It is documented that overweight people get inferior medical care, so go you.”
“That doctor should be reported. Don’t give up OP. It’s hard but you will find another good Dr who is supportive and caring.”-LeafCase9847
“NTA – the guy has your records and should know better than to tell you to lose the weight faster.”
“If anything, a good doctor might have suggested (I’m not a doctor so I’m guessing this), something like getting into better shape via exercise (muscles weigh more than fat but you’d be in better shape and healthier) rather than just ‘lose weight faster.'”-RandomCashier75
“NTA Honestly not all doctors care about records. My Mom had a stroke and her speech was impaired….her doctor’s office acquired a new doctor and she caught my Mom’s case for an appointment.”
“She belittled my Mom, mocking her stuttered speech and literally told my Mom she couldn’t be bothered to read her chart.”
“We filed a complaint and switched doctors offices all together when best we were told was that particular doctor would never see my Mom again but was still practicing at the office.”-Any_Project_6644
That doctor is basically committing malpractice and could get in a lot of trouble.
“NTA – any doctor should always check the charts/records first. This is simply out of logic and avoiding accidentally killing/offending your patients.”
“My mom actually has three allergies to medications that are very commonly used to the point these medications could actually kill her.”
“Any doctor that even suggests that basically gets the verbal slap across the face of ‘Hey, do you want to kill me? Read My Chart,’ from my mom.”-RandomCashier75
“NTA also his advice could be dangerous, unless your weight is causing serious issues you’re better off not losing too much weight too fast or it can make you sick or mess with your gallbladder.”
“There are times doctors need to discuss weight loss but this isn’t one of those times because you’re literally already doing so under the guidance of a professional and everyone deserves proper care regardless of weight.”-Crinklecutchip
“NTA. I wouldn’t call gaining 150lbs because of taking a life saving medicine then having a life altering surgery the ‘easy way’ but you know, potato, potatoe.”
“It is insane and really mentally hard to process when you experience the vast difference in how people treat you depending on your weight.”-lsjdhs-shxhdksnzbdj
“NTA. I used to be obese and that kind of treatment was usual.”
“After I gave birth I had complications and had to be readmitted into hospital ( you know it is bad when they readmit you ) and one of the nurses kept making comments like ‘well I wont have any problem finding fat on your arm’ when giving me a shot.”
“Long before that I had a LOT of bleeding/pain issue and Dr’s, specialists and ER told me it was nothing, all in my head, because I was obese.”
“IF I lost weight any problems I ‘thought’ I had would go away. After 2 years of seeking help I gave up until the pain was so bad I ended back in Emergency where this DR found a ‘tumor the size of a small chicken’.”
“I was being sent to another hospital where a surgeon was waiting to operate. Huh? You all said it was because I was FAT.”-Curlytomato
OP is within their rights to be angry, because a doctor insulting you is still a person insulting you.
Healthcare is a human right and should be administered free of discrimination.