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Teen Upsets Their Mom When They Decide Not To Get ‘Family Tattoo’ Now That They’re Eighteen

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Tattoos have become more and more popular. People from all walks of life now get tattoos.

Families even share the experience.

But what if one family member isn’t on board?

A young person found themself at odds with their family over a tattoo. So they turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback.

Redditor HumanBarracuda1 asked:

“WIBTA if I don’t get our family tattoo?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“A bit over 4 years ago, a few days after my older sister’s 18th birthday my mom, sister and me decided to all get the same small ‘family tattoo’ on our wrists.”

“My sister and mother already got their tattoo, and I was supposed to get mine after I turn 18.”

“But I have changed my mind, and I’m now uncomfortable with getting a tattoo. But when I told my mother she accused me of breaking our pact and not caring for her or my sister’s feelings.”

“I find this unfair because I was 13 at the time, but my mom insists what I should keep my promise and has started to pressure me into giving in.”

“WIBTA if I don’t get our family tattoo?”

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided OP was not the a**hole.

“Your body, your choice. NTA.” ~ AnotaCocktail

“It’s as simple as this! They can be mad all they want but if you end up regretting it, it costs so much to get them removed! NTA.” ~ Less_Event_3719

“I wanna ignore the fact that the mother is trying to hold OP up to a deal they made when OP was 13 and focus on the fact that a MOTHER is the one PEER PRESSURING their own daughter.”

“That’s downright disgusting.” ~ MooseChain

“Your skin your call!” ~ BarryZZZ

“There is a reason minors need a parents consent to even get tattoos, because it’s a huge commitment and their brains have not developed appropriately to fully appreciate the ramifications of such a decisions.”

“Your feelings on the tattoo now are prime examples of why this is necessary. Your family trying to hold you to that commitment is ridiculous, and you should not feel guilty about changing your mind.”

“You were literally a child. Who knows, someday you may decide you do want the tattoo, once you know what your life looks like, who you are, and as an adult have given it due consideration.”

“But if you get it now with your misgivings I think you’re likely to regret it. Don’t bend to the pressure. NTA.” ~ BitchRen

“If you were 18 and made that promise and backed out after they got their tats I would say you were the ahole but you were 13 at the time.”

“Your mom and sister are holding you to this? That is so unreasonable of them. NTA.” ~ Tinkerrific

“Even if they were 18, NTA to be honest! Tattoos are permanent and they can fucking hurt!”

“The one on the back of my knee felt like that man was flaying me. This is one of those things you need to be 100% sure about, regardless of age or ‘family pact’ lol.” ~ welliwasemily

“If the three of us (all 18) are there, 2 of us get ours and you back out, I’d respect your right but still think it was an a**hole move.” ~ heyelander

“NTA. The reason they don’t allow 13 year olds to get tattoos is because they know they’re not fully developed/informed enough to make that choice.”

“There is no reason you should be held to a choice you weren’t legally able to make.” ~ Miss_Magpie_

“Right!? Kind of reminds me of the AITA post about a person’s BIL getting their 12 year old nephew a tattoo.”

“Like… a real one. And the nephew seemed like he didn’t even want it in the first place. Kids shouldn’t get tattoos period.”

“I got a tattoo spring break of senior year. I was 18 at the time and my then best friend talked me into it.”

“Its f’king awful looking. The ink blew out, the tattoo is black with purple shadows instead if the other way around.”

“It’s just an eyesore. But I can’t get rid of it because it’s a reminder to me to not do impulsive things, and the friend is now dead. So I keep it for her too.” ~ QCisCake

“NTA. It’s your body. I get that they’re disappointed, but a tattoo is permanent.”

“Only you can decide if you want one.” ~ Rice-Correct

“Besides, a tattoo on the wrist is pretty noticeable, it’s something people couldn’t ignore.” ~ GingerStoat

“And unfortunately may bar them from getting jobs.” ~ asdf3141592

“NTA. Your family is being comically unreasonable.” ~ Djaq

“NTA – And honestly, a mother that would hold their child accountable for something they ‘agreed to’ as a 13yo – WOW, that is NOT a thing!!”

“Sorry, but think you’ve got bigger problems. Hope you are making plans for your future…kinda feels like anything you plan to grow/educate/move forward would be sabotaged to keep you right there with them…” ~ Babsgarcia

“NTA. Contracts signed by a minor aren’t legally binding for a reason.” ~ Lion_ebony___

“NTA. Breaking your pact?”

“Is your family a cult? A coven of witches perhaps?”

“Your mother gets no say in what does or does not go on your skin.”

“And if your mother is the type to hold the promises of children against them I guess I should write a note saying sorry for not being a space shuttle.” ~ Dangerfyeld

“NTA. INFO: does your mom have any friends her age to hang out with instead of trying to be the cool mom who tries to be their kids friend??” ~ Based_God12

“NTA. You can’t hold someone accountable for something they said as a suggestible child.”

“Kids just agree with whatever cuz it makes people happy and whatever. If you don’t want a tattoo you’re never obligated to get one.” ~ awkarfnar

“NTA it is your body at the end of the day and you agreed to it when you were a lot younger.” ~ theworldisnotquiet

“NTA. You were a kid when you decided to do it, and now you’re uncomfortable with getting one.”

“Your mother saying you dont care about her or your sister’s feelings while at the same time not caring about yours is wrong.” ~ ckbruinfan

“It would be one thing if you were all over 18 when you made a pact to get a tattoo together, but you were a kid when you made this decision.”

“You shouldn’t be held to it as an adult. And if you feel uncomfortable, you shouldn’t do this. NTA.” ~ DaniCapsFan

“NTA. You were literally 13 at the time. We all say/want things at 13 that down the line we would never even consider.”

“More importantly, you’re allowed to change your mind, especially when it comes to what you do with your body.” ~ ow-mylife

“Of course NTA. My daughter and I planned a similar thing.”

“If she changes her mind, well, that’s life. I’m not going to give her a hard time about it.” ~ WritPositWrit

“NTA and your mother clearly needs to get a grip if all she has to worry about is the daft idea of a family tattoo.” ~ Wee-bull

“NTA. It is your body and you only get one. Don’t get a tattoo based on a promised when you were 13.”

“There is a reason 13 year olds can’t get tattoos. Your mom is an asshole for trying to pressure you into getting a tattoo.” ~ ShiloX35

“U couldn’t possibly know for sure u wanted a permanent tattoo at the age of 13. NTA but ur mom is.” ~ cautiouslizard

“NTA. Why would you get a permanent mark on your skin already knowing you’ll regret it?” ~ Hyru_Nayru

Redditors all agreed, the OP had the right to change their mind at any time. They shouldn’t be held to a promise they made when they were only 13.

Written by Amelia Mavis Christnot

Amelia Christnot is an Oglala Lakota, Kanien'kehá:ka Haudenosaunee and Metis Navy brat who settled in the wilds of Northern Maine. She considers herself another proud Maineiac.