Redditor Perplexed After Vegetarian Wife Confesses She Thought He'd Give Up Meat For Her Eventually

The six countries with the highest percentage of vegetarians might surprise people.

India leads with a full 29.5%.

Next are Mexico (19%), Brazil (14%), Taiwan (13.5%), Israel (13%), and Australia (12.1%).

The six countries with the smallest percentage of vegetarians are Russia (1%), Portugal (1.2%), Spain (1.4%), Slovenia (1.5%), South Korea (3%), and Greece and Colombia (both 4%).

The United States has the seventh-fewest vegetarians, at just 4.2% of the population.

People adhere to a vegetarian diet for a variety of reasons. For some, it's a religious requirement, while for others it's a moral obligation or a health or environmental concern.

One Redditor turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback.

FeeInfamous3921 asked:

"AITA for refusing to go vegetarian for my spouse?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"My wife and I have been married for 6 years and together for 8 years. She has been a vegetarian since she was 17 (we are both 31 now)."

"Her reasons for being a vegetarian have always been personal preference, and she's noted in the past that it doesn't bother her that I eat meat, even offering to cook meat for me sometimes when we first got together."

"To be clear, I am the family cook. I make dinner/meals 6 out of 7 days a week. I prepare her food with extra care so there is no risk of cross-contamination."

"Cooking is a stress reliever for me. She is happy to cook, but it's a great way for me to decompress after I log out from work, so it just works out that way."

"I've purchased her an air fryer and other appliances that are meat-free so she can prepare her snacks with peace of mind. 95% of the meat I cook is either stove top or microwave (i.e. chicken nuggets etc...)."

"She has confessed recently that she always assumed I would just become a vegetarian. This obviously did not happen, though I do not eat red meats at home and I don't eat pork at all (just personal preference)."

"I do quite a bit of meal prepping and the chicken or salmon I cook can have a distinct smell that, unfortunately, makes my wife queasy. I work from home, and my wife doesn't work, so there isn't really a time for me to cook without her around."

"We don't have kids and are likely to be a child-free home. She does 95% of the other household chores. Her not working has actually been a relatively recent development."

"She left her job about a year ago after facing some severe corporate burnout. She contributes quite a bit to our household."

"This has become a point of contention more and more, resulting in increasingly escalated confrontations. It's mostly like a passing comment and not something that was blown up or said with a lot of emotions."

"That said, it has become a persistent comment whenever the topic comes up. It's not like every day, but it's often enough that it feels like there is weight behind it, hence why I came here for objective, 3rd party opinions."

"We don't have a large house and it can be difficult for her to escape the smell."

"I definitely use the overhead fan, but I should probably double-check it's working, as it's been a while since I've tinkered with it. We have air purifiers in most rooms, I'm allergic to animals, but we have always been a dog household (my and her choice)."

"I usually try to confine my cooking/meal prep when she is sleeping in the morning or outside, but this doesn't seem to be enough."

"I will, unfortunately, not be going vegetarian."

"This is just a small sticking point in an otherwise very happy relationship! I don't think this is even remotely in the territory of ruining our marriage."

"I would say at this point 90% of our meals together are vegetarian. It's mostly lunches which I eat alone while Im working that are either already meal prepped or just something quick."

"AITA?"

Redditors weighed in using the AITA voting acronyms:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
• INFO - more information needed

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"NTA. That's on her for not being honest about her real preferences and dealbreakers. Sounds like this bothered her more than she let on, but she assumed (as many do, unfortunately) that she'd just be able to convince you to change later on." ~ seventythousandbees

"Yeah, she definitely pulled a bait and switch. I'm vegetarian. Lucky for me, my partner is vegetarian, but I've dated people who ate meat in the past. But the thing is, I never cook meat."

"Doesn't matter if it's for someone I'm dating; if I'm cooking, I don't do meat. But I also never expected a guy to go vegetarian for me either. She pretended to be cool with OP eating meat, cooked it for him, etc... and then she pulled the rug." ~ trewesterre

"Easy solution is OP's partner finds a job or hobby to get out of the house for a bit so OP can make his meals." ~ BigLuffyEnergy

"That’s what’s blowing my mind; she doesn’t work, and she cooks maybe one day a week. OP is also being very courteous about avoiding cross-contamination and trying to cook meat when she’s not around to smell it. He didn’t go into the marriage expecting her to start eating meat." ~ BresciaE

"Obviously NTA. She was with you for two years, got married to you without communicating this, and now on year EIGHT? It's an issue? What?" ~ Technical-Region-669

"I'm guessing, like others in this thread have said, that she figured she could slowly pressure OP to change, and now that she's finally realized that's never going to happen, now it's a problem, and she's escalating, hoping she'll still be able to get her way." ~ ywgflyer

"If you are a vegetarian expecting to slowly pressure your partner to change...you had better be doing 95% of the cooking, not the other way around." ~ throwaway5498124181

"As a vegetarian myself, I find this odd. I started eating as a vegetarian and then a few months later connected with my now partner. Even though I do most of the cooking and we mostly eat vegetarian out of convenience. If he wants meat I don't mind preparing it, I just won't pay for it." ~ vesa87

"NTA - I speak as a vegetarian of 31 years who also made that choice solely because I don't like to think about where meat comes from, so I probably shouldn't eat it. You can't make that choice for other people. I'm not sure what advice to offer re: the smell of cooking meat, though." ~ SuperDoctorAstronaut

"I also wonder if she complains about the smell to get him to go vegetarian. I know fish can really smell, but she's been around these smells for the last 6 years. I can't imagine the smells getting 'worse' when she never stopped being around them."

"I would understand if she worked from home and he only recently started cooking meat in the house, but he's never stopped cooking this in the house and she acknowledges being manipulative." ~ Firm_Cookie_8747

"I'm a lifelong vegetarian that gets queasy when I smell chicken or ground beef cooking, and there are ways to deal."

"You can make agreements to open a window or the door to the backyard if it’s open concept while cooking (honestly good practice in general to keep your furniture from absorbing the smell and to keep the air from getting Smoky sometimes), you can light a candle after, you can close all bedroom doors prior to cooking so the smell stays in the kitchen and you have a place to escape."

"Unless they live in a studio, she’s doing too much." ~ Icy-Mortgage8742

"Hopefully OP at least has the fan over the stove going while he's cooking meat. If he does, make sure it's actually working properly (and isn't clogged/just there to look pretty), and maybe have a couple air purifiers scattered around the house that can be turned on while cooking?"

"I'm vegetarian and have lived with roommates who aren't, and having an air purifier that can get rid of cooking smells in my room has been super helpful. Along the same lines - if there are any doors that can be closed between where OP is cooking and where she is, definitely close them until cooking is done and long enough has passed for the purifiers/stove fan to do their work."

"I've been able to keep the smell of curry out of my room/not noticeable in my room by doing that before, while the rest of the house smelled of curry for days (I was the one making the curry)." ~ birdsandbagels

"NTA. She married you hoping you would change. The fact that you didn't is now offending her. She should have made it clear that this was a deal-breaker for her before you got married." ~ CanAhJustSay

While OP isn't interested in giving up their omnivorous ways, they have some tips and tricks to try to minimize the smell.