College tuition prices are out of control.
The cost of education can leave people in debt for life.
Nowadays, to get a loan, one may need a co-signer.
But not everyone is willing to do that.
Redditor SwissCheese1981 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.
They asked:
AITA- for not co-signing my niece's student loans
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
"My niece is heading to college this fall."
"Her parents make over $150K together, and as a result, she doesn't qualify for federal student aid."
"Yesterday, they went to the bank to try for private student loans."
"My niece, being 18, needed a co-signer."
"Her parents applied to do this, but they have trash credit scores and were denied by the bank."
"Her parents have always been very wasteful spenders."
"Her mom is over $100K in student loan debt and has deferred her student loans multiple times, most recently to get to a PhD, which was completed 2 years ago."
"Good for her, but not good for her credit score."
"They are always paying bills late and will get shut-off notices for utilities."
"They leave TVs on when no one is home and get upset over $500 electric bills."
"They have a $40,000 car loan with a super high interest rate."
"Their house is full of brand-name clothing, sports memorabilia, expensive computer equipment, and gaming systems. "
"They have KNOWN for years that their daughter wanted college but never made a plan, never saved, never did anything."
"So, the loan application gets denied, and they come to my partner and me and ask us to co-sign."
"We make less than half of what they do, but have good credit scores because we keep our bills paid on time and don't put off paying loans."
"We recently took out a car loan for $20K, which is our only debt."
"We discussed helping, but decided that if she were not to pay the loans, it would be too much of a financial burden for us to take on."
"She needs around $30,000 a year for her school of choice "
"We can't shoulder that burden."
"We offered to help with books or a dining plan, but said that we can't co-sign the loans."
"My niece's parents are mad at us."
"But I don't think that her education costs are our responsibility, and that her parents should have planned and been more responsible, especially knowing that their daughter was interested in college."
The OP was left to wonder:
"So AITA?"
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You're The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- INFO - More Information Needed
Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A-hole.
"OMG. Absolutely not."
"I would never cosign or be a guarantor for anyone, but with a family like that, definitely not NTA." ~ Ok-Isopod1172
"Exactly, co-signing would actually be enabling the parents to carry on living the way they are because they wouldn’t be responsible for the debt." ~ odysseyqueenx
"I wanted to add, if they give you pushback, suggest them downsizing their house, selling off the expensive cars and buying used and selling off the designer clothing."
"For some reason I don't think it will go over very well." ~ Tasty-Run8895
"She should do two years of community college if finances are that dire."
"No way should u cosign that loan. NTA."
"Plus, what if u have a child who someday wants to go to school?"
"This could impact your ability to fund their education." ~ rastagrrl
"NTA - This is on your niece and her parents to figure out truly."
"She needed to get a job sooner, plan on working through college."
"Start at community college."
"There are so many options." ~ Lunar-Eclipse0204
"NTA - if she doesn't qualify for FAFSA and her parents are unable to cosign for her loans, she needs to be looking at going to a cheaper school."
"That's just the financial reality of her situation."
"I'm sure that the $30,000 school is her 'dream school,' but sometimes dreams CAN'T become reality."
"The reality is that she can't afford it, and the sooner she acknowledges that, the sooner she can figure out a new path." ~ IceRose81
"I agree."
"She could do her first 2 years at a CC to get all the prerequisites out the way."
"The point is to get the education, and unless she’s going into something very niche, no one cares where the degree is from or what her grades were as long as she passes." ~ ThaiChili
"When I started college (I believe back in the dark ages), not everyone qualified."
"I didn't because my parents earned too much and we weren't rich by any means."
"Plus my dad and mom divorced, and dad refused to pay anything for college."
"I went to a community college and transferred to a 4-year."
"By the time I was ready to transfer, a 4-year university had started a program where they offered classes on my community college's campus."
"I lived at home, worked, and got two degrees by going to school in my own town!"
"Loved it."
"OP's niece might be able to do a community college for the first two years." ~ KoolJozeeKatt
"They need to do the financial aid through the school; they can arrange loans through the Dept of Education."
"They will be in the student's name, with the parents as cosigner."
"When they say they 'didn't qualify for financial aid,' they probably meant they didn't get any free money."
"Pell grants, school aid, but everyone can qualify for educational loans."
"Don't get drawn into their financial drama."
"My wife and I make more money than they do, and even though we didn't need any college loans for our kids, we did the financial aid through the school to qualify for merit scholarships based on smarts and kids' activities, and they offered loans." ~ ExtremeCod2999
"Her parents have good jobs but crappy credit and still have loans… run!"
"Absolutely not."
"Her parents are idiots. NTA." ~ Crazy_adventurer262
"You're probably going to have people say that 'no' is a complete sentence, but if you're reaching out to Reddit it's probably difficult for you to say no to your family."
"So if you need an additional excuse, you can point out that co-signing any loan will change your debt-to-income ratio and will limit your ability to get other loans, which is yet another reason to decline this unreasonable request."
"NTA, of course." ~ DCNumberNerd
"NTA. But your niece's parents sure are."
"First, for not making any plans for your niece's advanced education, and asking you to guarantee her loans, is an insane ask."
"It doesn’t matter if they make 150 thousand per year, if they’re spending 170 or 200,000 per year."
"It’s no wonder their credit scores are garbage."
"Do not cosign, and anybody that complains about it just volunteered to cosign for your niece." ~ u2125mike2124
"Let them be mad. Forever."
"Because that's how long you'd be on the hook for a 120,000 of debt if or when she drops out or stops paying."
"And the risk of that, given how she was raised around money, is very high."
"Tell them it's not an option and that you won't be discussing it again, then mute their calls/texts." ~ capmanor1755
"NTA. I didn’t need to read beyond the headline… but I did anyway."
"If your niece is disappointed, then perhaps you should have a chat with her and tell her why her parents can’t help her."
"She may not know the extent of their stupidity." ~ Nanabanafofana
"NTA, not your child."
"Unfortunately, your niece has parents that did not plan ahead, and that is def not your problem."
"I'm guessing your niece has not been exposed to good financial examples either."
"She will likely end up like her parents debt-wise." ~ Own_Concept5629
"When applying for my daughter’s financial aid, it never occurred to me to ask my brother to co-sign for a private loan."
"That’s not a normal expectation for extended family."
"She might need to look into cheaper schools. NTA." ~ LongjumpingSkill9305
"They are mad at you because you said no, but yet they can’t help her because they didn’t plan better??"
"Why does she need to go to a school that is $30,000 a year?"
"Do not do this."
"You will be on the hook the rest of your life."
"Your niece probably hasn’t learned financial responsibility; she won’t pay, she will defer, and it will ruin your credit, and you will be on the hook for her loans."
"Co-signing is saying you will pay!" ~ Ok_8890
"NTA. 30k a year in LOANS for an undergrad degree?"
"That is just a disaster for financial failure."
"Her parents' largest failure was not guiding her to a much more affordable college option; she could start at community college, she should be commuting."
"They may be mad now, but she can thank you later."
"Not all heroes wear capes."
"I do some counseling related to college selection and admissions, and I have kids in college."
"In my opinion, no one should be cosigning loans for college."
"Step one is set a realistic budget and apply to realistic options, and you don't have an acceptance until you have a financial offer that works."
"These parents are huge AH for setting their child up for a setback in August before she is supposed to start college."
"Hard life lesson, but she will have options." ~ KickIt77
Reddit is with you, OP.
That is a lot of responsibility.
And it's a lot of money.
It's on them to find a solution.
Good Luck.
