Redditor Livid After Wife Ropes Them Into Attending Neighbor's MLM Pitch For $10k Cookware

Business models that involve selling products to family and friends while also recruiting other people to also sign up to become sellers are called multi-level marketing (MLM), network marketing, or direct marketing businesses.

MLM companies make plenty of money—much of it by selling sales kits to their sellers—but few of the sellers ever strike it rich. MLMs rely on recruiting more sellers, but eventually the market gets too saturated with sellers and product.

MLMs are frequently accused of being pyramid schemes, where the people making money get most of it off the people below them—the sellers they recruited. People at the bottom of the pyramid usually lose money.

While some MLM company products have loyal followings that endure for generations—like Amway and Tupperware—others thrive for a few years before going under—like LuLaRoe, Sarah Coventry, and Lia Sophia.

One common thing among most MLMs is the merchandise offers specials and discounts based on larger orders, but the products are rarely inexpensive. And some are very pricey.

Many sell with "parties" where activities and demonstrations are part of the sales pitch. While some people enjoy these get togethers, others don't like feeling pressured to buy.

A spouse who dislikes MLMs turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback after their wife accepted an invitation to one of these sales parties.

Bluechairs1234 asked:

"AITA for planning to be angry at a surprise MLM that I'm being guilt trip to going?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"My wife has been guilt tripped by our neighbor to go to something called a 'cooking show' and I had no idea what this was. But after research, I learned it's basically a demonstration to sell us super expensive cookware."

"And when I say expensive, I don't mean like $100 stuff. I mean like $1k cheese grater, pots and pans in the upwards of $10k. On the promise that the cookware supposedly helps reduce autism and diabetes or some ridiculous claim."

"I like these neighbors, but I felt betrayed on why they would invite us to this. I have asked others and it's basically being stuck hearing this sales pitch for possibly 3+ hours."

"I work hard on my weekdays and doing this on Saturday makes me pissed. And I know…'I don't have to go', but my wife is pressured to go as she wants to be polite."

"So I gotta go, because my wife is telling me to. So I told her, I'm gonna be super grumpy going into this, and she told me that's unreasonable."

The OP summed up their situation.

"I'm being the a**hole, because I'm planning to be super grumpy at a party that I don't want to go to. Which my wife thinks is unreasonable as we should be polite because they are our friends."

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors had a variety of reactions, with some saying the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"NTA. Don't go. And if you and your wife don't have multiple thousands of dollars to spend on snake oil, you should also insist that your wife does not go.

"Play the reverse card on her—if she goes, she's in massive trouble with you, especially if she buys something."

"Going to this demonstration is NOT a matter of politeness. Your neighbors are a**holes for trying to sell this bullsh*t to anyone, let alone people they have a relationship with." ~ NinjaLogic789

"NTA. Please don't let her be guiltripped into going. She needs to tell them that her budget is Farberware rather than high-end cookware."

"One of the women in my office years ago got involved in Mary Kay. She invited me for a makeover."

"I told her that I don't wear makeup due to my job—it gets in the way of the protective equipment—and wasn't interested in learning about it. She never asked me again." ~ No_Philosopher_1870

"NTA. If my neighbors pulled that, they'd be very sorry they invited me, because I'd be bugging them for solid proof of each and every absurd claim, as well as asking them what their commission was." ~ TyrannasaurusRecked

Others felt the opposite—the OP was the a**hole (YTA).

"I hate MLM as much as the next person, but YTA. If you don't want to go, don't go."

"But if you accept the invitation (or are willing to let someone accept on your behalf), then be a polite guest."

"They can't make you buy anything you don't want to, and you're the ones who agreed to attend. There's no need to be a jerk about it."

"That said, you would not be the a**hole in my book if, when you get there and they start the MLM pitch, you excuse yourself and say, 'I'm sorry, I didn't realize this would be a sales presentation. It's not something I'm interested in, and I don't want to waste your time or ours, so we'll be leaving now'."

"Even better, if you or your wife calls them to rescind your acceptance of the invitation ahead of time, with the same sort of explanation, because that way you won't be in their headcount for snacks." ~ catsaway9

"YTA since your plan is to go and be grumpy. Either go and be a decent human being or stay home."

"You don't need to punish everyone there, including your wife, because you don't know how to say no." ~ katieintheozarks

"As we instruct and educate children from a very young age- you do not have to do anything you do not want to do. Well, within reason of course when teaching kids, but the idea is to learn autonomy."

"You, sir or ma'am, as a full fledged adult, do not have to do anything you do not want to do, especially if it's beyond being polite for a 5 minute hello in passing conversation with your neighbor."

"But it does seem childish and a bit YTA if you don't just stay home, but instead go and be 'angry' the whole time." ~ kcsunshineee

"Yes, YTA. Stop being so whiny when you won't actually stand up for yourself."

"Either tell your wife why you don't want to go or tell her you will go, be polite, and not buy anything."

"Instead, you choose to act like a petulant, immature child and want to throw a fit. Grow TF up and act like an adult—even though you obviously are NOT one." ~ btfoom15

While some though everyone sucked (ESH).

"ESH. You're both entitled to say no, and the fact that she didn't shouldn't obligate you."

"But you're a grown adult planning to be unpleasant because you 'have to' do something you don't want to, when you don't have to."

"Picture a 5-year-old sulking and whining because they'd rather play outside than be running errands. It's only understandable because they're 5."

"Just don't go." ~ Inevitable-Place9950

"ESH. Just. Don't. Go."

"Going and being grumpy is not any better than not going, in terms of making your wife happy."

"Actually, you could go and be nice and pleasant, but question all of their claims and prices." ~ v_a_n_d_e_l_a_y

"ESH. You wrote, 'And I know…I don't have to go, but my wife is pressured to go as she wants to be polite'."

"Yet you are intending to be impolite. Do not go. Have some agency." ~ StAlvis

"ESH (everyone's spineless here). Grow up and grow a spine, both of you."

"Your time is insanely valuable, don't spend it on things you said yes to when you wanted to say no." ~ MyPornAccountSecret

"ESH. It's part of the marketing model to choose a weekend where you will be available, and push for people to attend."

"You and your wife are a**holes for entertaining their delusion, and they will harass you relentlessly as this is also part of their model."

"They are a**holes because they haven't realised MLMs are the fastest way to lose friends and family. They also haven't realised how damaging this can be for lots of people, especially those that are vulnerable and poor."

"Let them know that you're both not interested and won't support an MLM. Ask them not to invite you to any event relating to it, but you appreciate them as neighbours." ~ Cheeseburgers_

"ESH. Yes, your wife is trying to drag you to something that sounds miserable. You should not show up and throw a fit. That will only breed resentment."

"What you need to do is put your foot down and say you're not going to this event, and that's final. Set a boundary like a big boy and deal with the consequences."

"You're in the right about everything, but this 'I'm going to teach everyone a lesson by being insufferable' sh*t is exhausting and not effective. It's middle school stuff."

"A grown-up says 'I'm sorry, I know you would like me to come, but I'm not interested in spending my time that way, and the answer is no'." ~ fishsticks40

"ESH. Your neighbor for not disclosing the details and purpose of the event up front."

"Your wife for trying to force you to attend just because she felt guilty."

"You if you go in with a bad attitude and intentionally cause problems. You are a grown adult, don't go if you don't want to." ~ Dschingis_Khaaaaan

"You have to go because your wife says so? Are you a child? Is she your mom?"

"Don't go. Tell her she's free to attend awful MLM sales pitch events if she wants to, but you will do no such thing."

"Being 'polite' and 'supporting' people in MLMs isn't even a good thing to do in the first place. All it does is encourage them to keep doing what they're doing, and ultimately only the scummy company benefits. ESH." ~ SportQuirky9203

If the OP knows they're going to be miserable and their wife knows they don't want to go, what's the question?

Don't go. How hard is that?