Can we all just agree that women have a lot of better things to do than try to seduce random men? We’re just living our lives!
I think as a society we need to stop sexualizing clothes such as sports bras when really we just want to work out and be comfortable in peace.
Redditor FroggySpirit encountered this very issue. So she turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for moral judgment.
“AITA for wearing a sports bra outside of the gym?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“This situation happened a few weeks ago, but it’s been brought back up this morning through an online disagreement. For context I live on a military base, so etiquette is a bit different.”
“I go to the gym on base every weekday at the peak of the day (around 3/4PM) and my workouts are usually around half an hour of weightlifting. It’s not a ridiculous regimen, but it does leave me hot and sweating.”
“When I left the gym the other week it was also unusually hot outside, so I took off my shirt and walked the rest of the way to my car in my sports bra.”
“It is by no means a frilly or revealing bra or anything like that, in fact if anything it squishes my girls in and makes me look like I have man pecs. On top of that I was sweating and exhausted, so not a good look all in all.”
“Anyways two guys pulled up next to my car and I ended up standing around for a few moments waiting for one of the guys to get out of his side of the car because he was blocking my door. “
“The other dude joked at him to hurry up, I said it was no biggie, the first dude moved out of the way, and we all went about our respective day. I didn’t even think anything of it until this morning.”
OP was called out by another woman.
“I made a post on my neighborhood’s Facebook group asking how much candy I should be buying since this is my first Halloween on this base.”
“Not twenty minutes later I got a message from a random woman asking me if I workout at the gym on base, and after a few more questions she told me that one of the guys in that car was her husband and apparently he had talked about ‘this hot chick that was flashing her body at the gym’ to his work buddies.”
“I guess one of his workmates told her about it, my tribal tattoo was mentioned somewhere in the mix, and she just so happened to stumble across that post and my profile picture, where you can clearly see my tattoo.”
“Weird circumstance all in all, but then she proceeded to call me a home wrecking hoe and threatened to get me banned from the gym for breaking dress code.”
“The dress code states that, amongst other typical things like proper PT wear, women aren’t allowed to go in just a sports bra, but I didn’t even take my shirt off until I was like 10 feet from the gym.”
OP was confused.
“I just stated the above and told her that nothing even happened between me and her husband, but she replied that she was still going to report me to the gym and that ‘I knew what I was doing by being indecent in public’.”
“I haven’t been able to respond to her because Facebook has been down since then, but that last sentence has had me thinking.”
“I didn’t really think much of being out in a sports bra, but I guess the only people that I really see going shirtless on base are men running the track or doing frisbee golf.”
“And since etiquette is a little different on base, maybe I broke some unspoken rule about women not going out in public in just a sports bra.”
“I don’t, know but I’ll accept any judgment I receive here.”
Redditors gave their opinions on the situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors agreed OP was not the a**hole.
“I am EXHAUSTED by the notion that a sports bra is ‘showing off’…especially when men are often shirtless. Especially when sports bras are so unattractive. Especially when it’s hot af and your clothes are sticking to you.” ~ shefalls1278
“Yeah, a lot of them are closer to crop tops than to lingerie.” ~ Bath-Optimal
“I’m big chested. Mine are closer to scaffolding than underwear and about as sexy too.” ~ Pleasant-Koala147
“Sports bras are basically crop tops I don’t get what’s the problem. Many actual tops are more revealing than a sports bra.”
“I don’t go to the gym but I swear to god where I live people go jogging in sports bras and no one gives a second thought about it. THEY’RE JUST SHIRTS THAT KEEP BOOBS TUCKED IN BETTER THAN OTHER SHIRTS.” ~ AngelForDemon
“The problem is pretty clear and it isn’t the bra. It is the other lack of self control by the husband and his wife being jealous. There are 2 people to blame in this story and neither of them are OP.” ~ tryoracle
“NTA! If her relationship with her husband is so precarious that a woman minding her own business in a parking lot will ‘wreck her home’ you’re not the problem. It’s between her and her husband, not you.” ~ spartang1nger
OP added some edits.
“I’ve taken some of your suggestions into account and screenshot the conversation. I’ll be heading to the gym later today and will make sure to clarify the dress code rules and make sure that I was following them.”
“Preemptive apologies because this might be quite long, and apologies to those who I didn’t get back to, I’ve been running errands all day and I’m not very active on social media to begin with.”
“Just came back from the gym—the first thing I did was go to the front desk and ask about the dress code rules to make sure I didn’t violate anything. The official verdict is that I was right on all counts: no it isn’t against the rules, but it is sort of an unspoken rule for women to keep their shirts on at this base.”
“For those who are interested I’m based at Fairchild, and for those who don’t know it’s sort of a smaller base with a generally middle-aged/older population (read: conservative). I didn’t think to mention it in the post but I’m 23 and, thanks to the miracle that is weightlifting, have a banging body.”
“It’s really whatever, at the end of the day I can’t change the community, I can only respect it.”
“I also found out when I went to the front desk that the woman who messaged me had already called and made a complaint. Big thank you to everyone who told me to save our messages, because she ended up spinning some wild story about how I was running around the gym in booty shorts and a racy sports bra and none of the staff did anything about it!”
“I didn’t think to mention my outfit that day either, but it was knee length spandex with a college sweatshirt, and the sports bra I was wearing was high neck and plain black.”
“I gave them the date and general time that all of this went down and they checked the cameras, both indoors and out, and the footage showed that the woman was lying. So at least my gym time is safe.”
“Lastly (deep breath), I did take everyone’s advice and ended up blocking the woman, but I found out through my neighbor that she made a whole entire post about me on the Facebook group.”
“In it she warned other married women that there is ‘some young hoe dressing scantily at the gym and messing around with taken men,’ gave them my description (I guess I blocked her before she could save any of my pictures), and told them to report me to the front desk if they saw me at the gym.”
“She also went on a rant about how little girls don’t respect the sanctity of marriage—didn’t think to mention this in my post either (or any of my messages to her), but I also happen to be married. At the end of the day I don’t really care about what strangers have to say about me, so I ended up just shrugging it off.”
“Also big thanks to the service members who commented, it helped a lot seeing things from the viewpoint of others who are in the same position as me.”
Sports bras are made for function, not to seduce random married men.